12505/A Free trip to the grocers!

A Free trip to the grocers!
Date of Scene:	19 August 2022
Location:	Big John's Grocery Outlet, Happy Harbor
Synopsis:	Scott and Barda go shopping, and Scott manages to stick his foot squarely in his mouth!
Cast of Characters:	Scott Free, Big Barda

---

Scott Free has posed:
Like many small towns, Happy Harbor still has a good number of institutional mom-and-pop stores to support the township. They thrive because of social loyalty, people who remember their parents taking them shopping there, and then continuing the tradition years later.

Big John's Grocery Outlet is one such place. The prices are good and the owners make a habit of keeping a lot of local fruit and meats in stock. They even host a Farmer's Market once a week during the harvest seasons, just to help keep smaller businesses thriving.

Scott is standing in the cleaning supply aisle with a pensive expression on his face. Khakis, short-sleeve white dress shirt, and a pale yellow sweater-vest look almost suspiciously 'normal'. "I don't understand why there are so many different detergents," Scott says. "This one offers 'more bounce' but this one 'brighter brights'. And this one says it will 'clean the crud and smell the freshest'." He looks at Barda with a helpless expression. "I just used whatever the laundromat sold me. I had no idea that it was *this* complicated!"

Big Barda has posed:
It's a little harder for Barda to blend in at times. Most women aren't as tall as she is or quite as muscular, but she is at least wearing a comfortable looking coral-colored maxi dress. It's a little less obviously 1940s housewife, but Barda had seen some sitcom on TV about the 70s. She peers at the broad selection of detergents, squinting at them as if it would somehow allow her more knowledge of the secrets of laundry.

"We should determine what outcome we want the most. How do clothes... bounce? That seems an odd thing. I have seen clothes glow bright before in the dark and I do not think that is something that would blend in. It's very distracting."

Scott Free has posed:
"They're not very elastic," Scott says with a frown. "Mine always just hit the floor and... stay there. I think that's the normal thing. So bouncy clothing must be... uh, cultural, I suppose?" he hazards.

Scott looks at the options again, picks the second-least-expensive, and tosses it in the cart Barda's pushing. "Two years here and I still haven't figured out most of this," he admits. "My old apartment had six humans in it. I just kept to myself. Once in a while they'd offer me some food but the only thing I got comfortable making was noodles. Thank the powers for Mother, she'd transmute it into something palatable if I got really desperate." He sighs. "But I gave up on that once I realized what a risk it was. Too easy for someone to pick up on."

They continue down the aisle, Scott referring to the shopping list in his hand frequently to make sure they're getting everything they need (or are supposed to get, needed or not).

Big Barda has posed:
"Perhaps we need to throw the clothes to get them to bounce..." Barda muses, pushing the cart down the aisle. She's careful not to lean on it too heavily as she pushes. Too many things in the store are unnecessarily fragile. "Do not worry, Scott Free. I am learning to cook! I can already make a few things very well and I am told there are recipes even on the food boxes. It is certainly my job as a traditonal housemaker to... make things in the house."

Scott Free has posed:
"I do appreciate that, Barda. Sincerely," Scott murmurs, and with a quick glance around, gives her hand a brief and grateful squeeze to go with the brilliant smile he gives his 'wife'. "And when we're in public, it's just 'Scott', remember? Darling?" he says, with a careful emphasis. "We really must do our best to blend in," he reminds her.

They turn into the cereal aisle, and Scott makes a face at the options. "How do humans consume so much sugar?" he asks Barda, forgetting his own insistence about being covert. "This is almost nothing *but* sugar and starches. Even I know enough about anatomy to know that it cannot be good for them," he mutters to the ravishing dark-haired beauty. "I don't even know if we can *get* as obese as some of them, no matter how we try."

Big Barda has posed:
Barda clears her throat and stands up straight, correcting her language. "Of course, /Scott/." Blending in is absolutely key, and she's not going to get that wrong. "Perhaps humans are lamenting their miserable existence by eating food that is unhealthy? I wonder if that is the reason for shorter lifespans..." She looks up from her musing, peering at the cereal. "Perhaps we should pick the one with the most clever painting on the front. I am not sure why animals are on the box but there really are a great many of them."

Scott Free has posed:
Scott makes a face at the suggestion, but it's a better one than he has. He casts around, picks up one with a rabbit and one with some kind of tiger on it, and holds both up to Barda. Whichever one she picks, he tosses into the cart. They're just about to start moving again when someone runs their cart into the Free's groceries.

"I'm so-- oh, hi Scott! And... Barda," the intruder says. Her name is Penelope Ramirez, and she had been an... enthusiastic welcome wagon for the Frees. Well, mostly for Scott. She's around 28 and is a fairly well-known social media personality. Whereas Barda is tall, pale, and regal, Penelope is short, energetic, and curvy, with a healthy tawny complexion and spray of curly black hair. The peach-tone dress she's wearing hugs her lush curves like a second skin. The expression she flashes at Barda is polite only in the technical sense of the term, but she turns her full attention to Scott a beat later. "Scott, I love the sweater. It's so kitsch. You're a one man fashion trend," she tells him.

"Er... thank you?" Scott says. "Barda picked it out for me."

"Well she sized you up just right," Penelope says, looking Scott up and down. "Sorry for being so clumsy. I'll see you later," she tells Scott, and walks away from them with a wave over her shoulder and a little extra sway in her hips.

Scott watches her walk away, looking a little dazed, then back up at Barda. "She's nice, isn't she?" he states with a beaming smile. After all, he's 'blending'!

Big Barda has posed:
Barda scrunches up her face when Penelope leaves, glaring down the aisle at her for a moment before she looks back to Scott. "She seems /too/ nice. I'm sure she's hiding dark secrets under that veneer of politeness!" She looks back to Scott, manuevering the cart to block the direction Penelope went in. "Do not worry Scott, I will protect you. Not everyone can be as 'nice' as they seem."

Scott Free has posed:
Scott blinks in surprise. "Goodness, you think so?" he asks Barda, looking truly surprised. It's not until the tension leaves Barda's shoulders that he dares to start walking in her wake, catching her up with two steps and resting a hand on her shoulder.

"Barda, you know I treasure our friendship," he reminds her. "You saved me from Granny. But we're not in *that world* anymore," he says, carefully stressing his words. "Not everyone is an assassin or informer, or conspirator. In fact I'd dare say, none of our neighbors are. We're a world away from Ap-- that place. Those people. We're .... safe, here," he declares. "Cautious, yes, but we don't need to be suspicious of everyone."

A beat passes and he lowers his hand. "You know, maybe you and Penelope should socialize a bit," he suggests to Barda. "I understand she's very, uh, 'fashion-conscious'. Maybe she could help you with your wardrobe?"

Big Barda has posed:
Barda's a little better at hiding the face she makes this time, but she directs her gaze away from Scott for a moment. "I know that things are different here, but it never hurts to be a little cautious," she insists. "I do not think I would like her help with my wardrobe. She... seems to like standing out too much. It won't help us much."

Scott Free has posed:
Scott looks a little ... uncertain. There's a niggling sense that he's missing Something Important, but Barda's composed mask is impenetrable even to him. All he sees is the towering Female Fury and her unimpeachable sense of safety and concern.

"...yes, of course," Scott says, with an apologetic tone. "I'm sorry. Security is your decision, and I won't question it. You're quite right, she does dress recklessly." He casts around, then looks at Barda and flashes that irrepressible smile. "C'mon, we're nearly done. We need milk, juice, that ... 'coffee' stuff, and then you mentioned that you wanted some kind of animal protein to eat."

Big Barda has posed:
"Yes, we should... get the things on the list," Barda says, trying not to frown. "Animal protein, yes..." She says, distracted as she picks up a whole frozen chicken by a leg and peers at it before she looks back to Scott. "What do you think of this one?" She then pauses. "/Scott/, what do you think is so nice about our neighbor?" She glances in the direction where Penelope went, as if waiting for her to round a corner.

Scott Free has posed:
"She looks delicious," Scott tells Barda with a grin.

There's a beat, and he nods at the chicken. "I'm sure you'll do something clever with it, I mean," he clarifies. "Chicken tastes like everything, apparently, so there must be many ways to prepare it."

Much as Barda prefers to do it, he offers to take a turn pushing the cart. "As for Penelope... uhh, I don't know," he admits. "She's just... very friendly. None of those fake smiles," he says. "I can spot those a mile away. She is always courteous and asks questions and tells me her plans, like when she'll be home or doing her ablutions in the shower. And she's offered me to 'have a drink' a few times. I don't know what that means, I always tell her 'no thanks, we have water as well.' Never seems to stop her, though."

Big Barda has posed:
Barda holds the chicken up and drops it into the cart with a *thunk*. She perhaps didn't mean to drop it so loudly, but her face scrunches up in annoyance. She understands /some/ of what Penelope is trying for and the rest of it she can assume. "Of course, she is very nice. It wouldn't do spend too much time with her alone, people might get the wrong idea that you don't like to spend time with our other neighbors."

Scott Free has posed:
Scott blinks twice. "Time alon--- ohhhhh," he says, softly, and nods at Barda. "Goodness, that never even occurred to me. You're quite right, Barda, thank you," he tells her with real gratitude. "Yes, it's the sort of thing people can misread. We must be, uh, /convivial/, right?" he inquires of Barda. "Make everyone feel welcome and get a reputation for being pleasantly average in every way."

They start walking again, heading into the ice cream aisle. Scott clinks his 'wedding ring' against the cart thoughtfully, then swings his fist in a short arc of triumph against the cart. "Hah! You know what would be smart? You should invite her over!" he tells Barda. "That way no one will think that we're being unsociable. What do you think of that, dear?"

Big Barda has posed:
"/Scott/ darling," Barda says. She's getting good at this saying his name thing. "I do not believe that Penelope is as /interested/ in visiting me as she is in visiting you." She wrestles the cart away from him when his hands are in the air and starts pushing it forward. Thankfully, she's not crashing into anyone but she's certainly pushing it faster.

Scott Free has posed:
Scott just stands there looking a little befuddled as Barda is marching away. Hands spread in confusion, then fall to his sides. He looks behind him, then at Barda's wake. He doesn't know much about Earth, and even less about women, but he knows what Barda's Angry Shoulders look like, and the tension in her neck woe betides anyone who threatens to get in her way.

"...What did I say?" he asks of no one in particular!