12567/Reconciliation of the Trinity

Reconciliation of the Trinity
Date of Scene:	22 August 2022
Location:	The Velvet Room - Hallway
Synopsis:	Chas and Rien find Jon in the prison of the Velvet Room. There they discuss his significance and his place among their trio. Healing has begun, but there is still road to tread.
Cast of Characters:	Chas Chandler, Rien D'Arqueness, Jonathan Sims

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Chas Chandler has posed:
    The passage back is... quite different. The door leads to a hallway, much like the one below. Blue walls, blue and butterfly motif tiles. At a T-intersection a stair starts down. After turning in on itself it leads to the stone room where the group had fought the summoned monster Mara. There is no sign of that battle despite it taking place less than an hour before.

    At the arch leading into the prison proper Rien is hit again by that wave of Power. There is a definite deliniation between the rest of the castle and here its heart. Chas wrinkles his nose at a tickling sensation that threatens a sneeze that he is all but certain he doesn't need to do and the sensation passes. "Jon?" he calls in the seemingly empty (save for the crystals) hallway. "Where you at mate?" he adds, his tone attempting to convey worry and open friendliness.

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
That wave makes her pause, frowning. "There is still so much that we just don't know about this place... it's.. unsettling." Shaking her head, Rien shoves that tickle at the back of her mind aside. Not why they're here. She paces deeper into the hallway of crystal alcoves, glancing this way and that.

"Jon? Please, we'd really like to talk to you..." She glances at the tome, "We brought the tome back as well, if you wanted to look through it..."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    "Cael talked to you, didn't she?" Jon's tone is wry, and coming from somewhere further into the prison. Following the sound, the other two would find him sitting at the top of a staircase that seems to lead further down, wings still folded around himself like a shield. He has his hands on his knees and his chin on his hands, and is peering down the stairs toward whatever lies below.

    "There's some major power down there," they murmur as the other two approach. "I considered heading down but, well, I figure I shouldn't be wandering around without supervision, hmm? I tend to stumble through portals and fall out of reality and get attacked by people I thought were friends." The tone is more amused self-deprecation than anything bitter or sarcastic.

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas grins softly as he turns to look at Jon. "Admittedly yes. But our worry for you has not been nonexistent and our decision to come down now was our own. But her words did give us notice that we have been..." he pauses. "Found lacking in our understanding of what is important. And for my part in that... I apologize."

    He frowns his gaze redirecting to the dark archway leading to the lower level. "Probably a good idea. But not because you might blunder into something... but because we should be together for the initial exploration of this place. We're a team: you, Rien, and I and if we're going to claim ownership of this place I think it should be done together instead of individually. Despite our various curiousities."

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
"She told us we were being insensitive. And she was right. Good intentions, but insensitive nonetheless." Rien puts it a little more bluntly, then adds, "But we do hear you. And I am sorry for not being more aware of and sensitive to your needs. We're your friends, we should have done better."

She crouches down near him and holds the tome out, "But we do trust you. And we want to know how you think we can best support you right now." A glance down the staircase has her shuddering, "I for one am not looking forward to finding out what's /worse/ than these things that are being hidden even deeper in this place. But when you're ready to explore it... I'll be there to help."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    "I'm curious," Jon admits, still peering down the staircase. "I mean... I'm always curious. It's both my greatest failing and one of my strengths."

    He's quiet for a moment, still not looking at either of them. Then he says, "I know you didn't mean to be insensitive. Most people don't know how to handle their own emotions, let alone other people's." He chuckles. "If our society was better at teaching that, I wouldn't have been paid so much as a therapist, hmm? So it's not..." He blows out a long breath. "Emotions aren't always rational. I've been angry, but I've also been aware that maybe that anger isn't warranted, or is misplaced. So I've been trying not to take it out on you two, or... everyone else."

    He chews on his lip for a moment. Then, slowly, "For a long, long while I felt like... I felt like I was carrying all of this--the JLD--on my own. I stepped up and offered to be a leader in the first place because I was already doing that, coordinating people and taking charge, but I would have accepted if the group had chosen someone else. Instead, there was an insistence that we have a Trinity--which I thought was a brilliant idea, really. I didn't /want/ to lead, let alone do it on my own."

    They frown. "But then... John bailed at the first sign of trouble. Zatanna stepped away, and never really properly coordinated with me. Phoebe really never should have been a leader in the first place. Sara went off to focus on her other work. I've been the only one that's been... stable. Consistent. And that's not either of your fault, really, but between that and getting so much /shit/ from people about the 'Champion' business I've had a lot of resentment and frustration. When I was tortured, when I died and came back..." A snort. "Lydia came over to visit. That's... about it, really. So it's... I quite literally was tortured, and /died/, for this team. In a way that... I mean, the man I used to be? He's dead. Gone. 'Dr. Sims' died to save the world, and whoever I am now, I'm just trying to live up to his sacrifice. But the people around me never rallied to support me. I never felt... appreciated, by the team as a whole."

    A pause. "But to be quite frank, I also /despise/ that kind of bullshit martyr mindset. Plenty of other people would've stepped up to sacrifice themselves if asked. I shouldn't be doing this work for the appreciation or the... gods, I don't know. Most of the people I'm actually mad at about this are gone, now." He reaches up to rub at his face. "I know I sound like an ass. I'm sorry."

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas frowns for a long time as Jon speaks then he sighs. "Jon... since the moment you showed up on the doorstep of the Laughing Magician, you've been plagued by one thing or another. I will admit that John Constantine brings out the worst in people, directly or indirectly. But I played my own part in that entire ordeal... and for that I am sorry, but your frustrations are warranted. They have a foundation."

    The stair is wide enough, just barely, for the three of them to sit and so he moves in to sit beside Jon being careful of his friend's wings. "I guess, the question is... what can we do to show you that you -are- appreciated and that the things you've done--and are -doing- --for the team are appreciated?" He gently bumps him with his own shoulder. "Because it is. You showed yourself far more capable than your years of experience would say--and sure some of that was pronbably because you are more the mage than you thought but some of that is just because you're a damn fast study and when you are focused on a task, you press every ounce of your energy into finishing it. Which is what we needed at the time and with the three of us, it's what we need now."

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
Rien looks down at her hands, wetting her lips, "I know I didn't really help by just.. taking off.. in the middle of the angels thing. I should have communicated better about what I needed to do to help. That was my fault. I'm sorry it left you with so much.. everything.. to deal with." SHe glances up, "When you asked me to join the leadership of the JLD, it felt like.. like a chance to make things up to you. To help carry the burden that I hadn't been there to carry before."

Clearing her throat, she looks back down, "But then sometimes I get so focused on trying to... help, on trying to keep all the weight off you, that I miss things. Like.. when you need help. And that's not good either." Rien flashes a weak smile, "Curse of my paternal lineage... we're.. fixers. Problem solvers. We suck at relationships and interpersonal skills, so we try to make up for it by 'fixing' things. And that.. isn't always what's needed." She looks back up and smiles faintly, "So. Yes. Please tell us what /you/ need from us so that we can support you."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    Jon glances at Rien. "Maybe it'd help to know sometimes the problem that needs fixing is not being heard? Listening /can/ be a solution to a problem. Not an active one, though, which I get. You want to /do/ something, and that's... not always possible."

    He sighs. "What do I need...? Well, not being a damn cosmic whipping boy would be a start, but neither of you can fix that. Seems to come with the territory of being Archivist." He shakes his head. "I need to talk to Lydia, I think. I don't know what really happened, from her perspective. I don't know whether I should be furious or commisserating."

    They frown, and finally look around at the others. "The team's a mess, and I don't know what to do about it. Mercy has every reason to be worried about me seeing the book, you know? And I feel responsible for what Lydia did to others, at least. People don't know each other, don't trust each other. And as the longest-serving leader... that's on /me/. I haven't been a good enough leader, haven't been a good enough example."

    They frown, and look away. "I've been thinking of stepping down, because of that. I'm quite capable on my own--I know that now. But am I really fit to... lead people? That, I don't know. Maybe it would be better for me to step back into an advisory role, or something."

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas shakes his head. "I... Jon... you're fit to lead people just fine" he replies. "We need you. For that stability. For your power and your knowledge. And because if this situation's proved anything it's that we need you for your skills with people. We can't do what you do. Neither of us, or anyone in the JLD is as capable with people as you are. If you stepped away and removed the relations portion of our leadership, how long do you think it would take for us to fall? The next monster of nightmare that comes along would blow us apart and then..." he snaps his fingers, "goodbye reality. You are the glue that saves us from that fate."

    He reaches out to place a hand on his friend's knee and looks at him. "The team needs help... and I think, without you in the lead, we don't get that help." He looks up at Rien. "We're both -doers- and with often don't even check that what we're doing is what is needed. I can steer the ship, Rien can man the masts, but neither of us are going to be good at the tiller. You are the compass that helps us steer this ship in the storm." He pauses and smirks. "Went very nautical there didn't I? Should I get an eyepatch and a parrot?" he asks.

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
Rien nods to what Chas is saying, looking to Jon, "/We/ need you, Jon. Not just the team. Chas and I. We need you. We don't have your skills, we don't have your patience or your training or your /empathy/ towards people. Can you imagine what would have happened had it just been Chas and I in charge when Lydia was taken over? Do you think either of us would have had the forbearance to not just go in guns blazing to take her down without you pushing for it?" She blows out a breath and murmurs, "You see things in people that we miss. That we don't even know or think to look for."

She lifts a brow as Chas veers nautical, "Only if you get the pegleg to go with them." Rien looks towards Jon again and reaches out, laying a hand over his, "We need you, Jon. The team needs you. But so do we. You're not just a leader, you're our /friend/. None of this works without you." Giving a gentle squeeze, she starts to pull back her hand and looks to Chas, "Even the pirates had a fellowship."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    Jon laughs. "I wasn't the one saying not to go after Lydia guns blazing. People may have /presumed/ that, but I wasn't really pushing for... kindess." A pause. "If anything, I was trying not to put in my opinion because I wanted so badly for whatever's actually responsible for hurting me to /suffer/. I still do. I--" Another laugh. "I'm not as, ahh, kind as people tend to presume I am. Having been through Hell, it is my considered opinion that while a few people down there may not, by my standards, /deserve/ their punishment, /most/ of them do. And they all certainly believe they do."

    After a moment, he adds, "And it might be worth noting that I've never had any qualms handing hearts to Ammit, despite my once believing that that's essentially condemning a soul to oblivion. There is a part of me that wants Lydia to suffer for what she did, even if /all/ she did was give into her Beast during the High Priestess test. That wants to yell at her for being a coward, for leaving us alone with that... /thing/." He sighs, and shakes his head.

    Then they reach up to run their hands into their hair. "But I don't know what to... /do/, to fix the problem with the team. Because, well, if that's supposed to be what I'm good at--people--I'm doing a pretty blood poor job of things. Do we hold more social events? More training? Do I spend more time with each person, individually, get to know them?" A pause. "I think, perhaps, that anyone that doesn't prove they can handle the influence of the Fears is made an ally rather than a full member. And allies... don't get to come down /here/. That's the real problem with Lydia, down in my core. She's not... she's not proving herself to be strong enough of heart to handle... this." He gestures around at the prison around them.

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas shrugs a shoulder. "That might be a good idea..." Chas says. "When I manage to get her to come to us... which I will do soon, you can speak your piece and we can do what needs to be done. After that... we can disuss policy, but I think in general more social events and more training would be good. Especially since Pixie might need to be our next focus and I can't imagine how to go about helping her without hurting her. Her soul is as much a physical item as it is an ephemeral thing." He shakes his head.

    "But again. Policy after healing... for you" he says. "But you're right, Lydia has proven herself to not be strong enough to handle... a lot. Which is the biggest problem. Stemming back to the door. She was so afraid of what she saw that she used a shortcut and that led to... more shortcuts." He sighs. "Ultimately, that's what her power was... a shortcut. A shortcut for people she perceived to be hurting or someone she wanted to hurt. We'll take care of it..." He gently gives Jon's knee a squeeze before returning his hand to his own lap. "And we'll take care of our own."

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
Shaking her head at Jon, Rien glances at him, "I don't mean /after/ Jon. I mean /before/. When you wanted to talk to her. You wanted a chance to save her. Chas or I... we would have been just as happy to stake her and leave her in a cage until we found a fix. Or.. if we couldn't, until we did what we felt we needed. Without /you/, there was no 'Lydia could be saved'." She nudges him lightly, "You're the one that believes people can be saved, at least some people. You see good in people that Chas and I don't always see."

She glances to Chas, "If the two of you want to... handle.. the Lydia situation, I can try talking to Pixie. I have a unique insight into her situation that might be helpful." Looking back to Jon, she smiles faintly, "Unless you want me along for Lydia, in which case, I'll be there."

Rien sets her elbows to her knees and offers, "I want to start helping more with the training. I'm.. not great with socializing, but I need to get better at it. So if I can take cues from the both of you on that, I'll pitch in more with sharing the... century plus of knowledge I've got." She smiles, "But first? You. We help you. first. Then we deal with the other stuff."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    Jon chuckles. "I'm not great at putting myself first. If you hadn't noticed." He sighs. "The team is part of it. I need to believe that I'm actually doing good work, and leading this team is part of that. If the state of the team isn't on me, then who? Unless you truly think it'd be /worse/ without me here."

    He stares back down the stairs. "I need to talk to Lydia. And then... some of it will just take... time. But I need to... I don't know, tackle problems I can actually solve. The trouble with all the focus on /people/ is that sometimes you just can't help someone, at all. You can do your best, and it still falls apart. I don't really have a great track record, with helping people, aside from Cael. Most of the people I've tried to help have either wound up badly off, or figured their shit out without me. So, you know... research, a battle, something like that? Something I can clearly succeed at? That'd be nice."

    They shake their head. "I can't force the team to trust me. I can't force them to follow me, and I can't force them to deal with their shit. Maybe that's why things keep falling apart, I don't know."

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas nods. "What you need is a win" he says and gestures to Rien. "She's got a book full of shit we have little to no idea about and we're thinking that maybe you do." He smiles over Jon to the blonde. "Maybe take a look at it and see if anything catches your fancy."

    He adds, "And yes, -everything- would be worse off without you around, Jon. Like I said, I think the team wouldn't be around without you here to keep us on track." He smiles. "Pegleg Chas aside... you help give us direction. We'd be forced to running down lead after lead and chasing trail after trail without your guidance and knowledge. That's our greatest asset and you're practically made of it. Rien fights fire with fire. I'm the muscle but you're the signal giver of this trio."

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
Rien nods towards Jon and murmurs, "I definitely understand feeling like nothing ever goes right. Or like.. whenever you try to help someone, it... ends badly. I don't help good people so much as I just... stop the bad people. Which is actually a lot different than it sounds." She clears her throat and glances at him, "But I /do/ know that without your support, I wouldn't be here right now. I wouldn't have.. opened up to people. It's because of you that I have friends at all."

She glances down and gives a nod, "So I agree with Chas. Without you, the team wouldn't be here right now. Because I wouldn't be here. And I'm not the only one." Rien clears her throat and looks to Jon again, smiling, "So. Think you're up for finding out about this place and these... creatures, we have captured? And we can all try to figure out how to move forward, together."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    "Not tonight. Not... exploring. Not just yet." Jon sighs, flexes their wings. "I... look, I won't step down if you think I really should be doing this. I... I know I /can/ lead people, I did it in Hell, but that's... admittedly a little different." He smirks. "I can't exactly threaten to cut the head off of team members if they won't cooperate, you know?"

    He looks over to Rien and reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm still sorry I missed that you weren't... you. I'm sorry I didn't do better. But I'll be there to help you take the Tower from them." He smiles. "And I would regardless. I'm not planning to go anywhere. This..."

    They look around. "This place, it feels... /right/, somehow. My duty is to track down and deal with immortal criminals, basically. I'm a supernatural cop, in a way. The only option the Archivists have had, for /years/, is death. Imprisoning them... maybe even working on cleansing them, bringing them into balance? That's much, /much/ better, to my mind. I could spend the rest of my life working on filling this place up, and it'd be satisfying."

Chas Chandler has posed:
    Chas nods looking around. "That... makes sense actually." He pushes up and offers a hand to help Jon to his feet. "Then we'll table the exploration for tonight, but I do think you need to take a look at the ledger. To at least see what you can make of it." He jerks his head a bit.

    "Come on up, I can make you one of your old favorites and we can discuss the next steps? For you, for the team, for us as Wardens of this place." He pauses. "Or not... we'll leave that up to you. But let's go be around friendly faces. Cael's up there after all. She's probably at least halfway through the High Priestess bottle by now."

Rien D'Arqueness has posed:
Shaking her head, Rien smiles at Jon, "Of anyone, I think it would have affected you most. That perfect recall of yours, you know. It changed everything so that you would be /absolutely certain/ that the fake me was the real me." She squeezes his hand, then pushes up to her feet and holds the tome out to him, "Here. I recognized a few of the names, but mostly just the demons. You might have better luck with the others."

She glances to CHas and givesa nod, "She said something about burning Lipton in effigy? Chas talked her down from trying to bring any in here, but we could always do a.. a substitute burning."

Jonathan Sims has posed:
    Jon closes his eyes for a moment. "No. No, gods, that's... /really/ not necessary." He shakes his head. Then, after a moment's hesitation, he takes Chas' hand and climbs to his feet. Another hesitation, and then he hugs the big man for a moment, before pulling away and turning to hug Rien.

    "Thank you," he says, "for coming to talk to me. For apologizing, and... caring. I appreciate it, I really do." He takes the tome from Rien, gently, not cracking it open just yet.

    "No reading aloud from the book until we're a little more sure of it, hmm?"