14298/Late Night Bat-Mite Meals

Late Night Bat-Mite Meals
Date of Scene:	02 March 2023
Location:	Batburger
Synopsis:	Tim drags Lonnie and Phoebe out in the middle of the night on a Quest. Several Bat-mite meals later, they still don't find a Robin toy. I mean action figure.
Cast of Characters:	Tim Drake, Phoebe Beacon, Lonnie Machin

---

Tim Drake has posed:
    The price of knowing Tim: it's 2 o'clock in the morning on a night he doesn't have patrol but he's awake, hungry, and frustrated with his inability to find a Robin figure from Batburger. In the past week he's gone no less than five times, some external pressure driving him to try and complete his collection ASAP, and this, this right here?

    A last ditch effort.

    They've driven all the way to Bludhaven, of all places. Well, Tim drove, that's only fair because this is his Quest, but he's dragged Phoebe and Lonnie along on this wild ride.

    Okay, there's nothing wild about being in Batburger at 2AM. There are a few beat cops getting their mid-shift meal, a couple of teens who are nebulously out past bedtime, and a skeleton crew of minimum wage workers. Tim sets his tray down at a table in the corner, all the better to do some (meager, given the current building occupancy) people watching. "I can't open this," he says, holding out the blind-bagged toy from his Bat-Mite meal. "It's too stressful at this point. One of you needs to do it for me."

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    "I dunno, should I say something professional or is that gonna be considered cheating if I try to change Schrodinger's Sidekick?" Phoebe inquires. She'd been pulled away from writing an urban ethics paper with a scalding review of anti-homelessness archetecture, and her hair was up in a wrap tonight instead of braided, so the coils and kinks were a little all over the place, wearing a black sweatshirt with some epic space rock band on it, and a pair of jeans tht she definitely put tears in on her own and were not purchased that way, leggings protecting her legs from the cold as she settles with her own two Bat-Mite meals.

    She's just happy they allowed for the 'upgrade' to a black bean burger for her pair.

    "You want the honors, Lonnie?" she asks, motioning to Tim's toy.

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    Lonnie is frequently up at 2 AM. When Tim told him what he wanted to do, he just laughed, and came along. Why not?
    So he's sitting across from Tim with a milkshake and an unopened Bat-Mite meal, and he raises his eyebrows at Tim, before he drums his fingers on the table, and he says, "You're being superstitious." He sips his milkshake. "You have a one in six chance. A 16.67 percent chance. Assuming even distribution of figures between each Batburger franchise which is STATISTICALLY unlikely, but I also know the most popular figure is Nightwing-" He shrugs. "I would be jealous but I trademarked my own likeness so no one can commercialize it. Use the system against the system."
    He plucks the baggie out of Tim's hand, and then casually tears the plastic open.

Tim Drake has posed:
    "It's not an even distribution, though!" Tim starts unboxing the rest of his Bat-Mite meal once Lonnie has taken on the task of opening up the bag for him, his mini Bat-bean burger and Jokerized french fries joining his own milkshake on the paper-lined tray in front of him. And to his credit, he only scowls a little bit when Lonnie ends up with a Batgirl. "At least it isn't another Red Hood," is all he says.

    Then he rests his elbows on the table, cupping his face in his palms, and sighs. "I want to find it fair and square otherwise the whole search is pointless." Tim's gaze cuts to Lonnie, and he shakes his head. "And you don't market any Anarky merch?" What follows is a pause only the space of a heartbeat before Tim shakes his head again, this time more dramatically. "Nevermind, stupid question." He unwraps his bean burger and looks down at it with an expression of mixed disgust (it's his sixth so far this week, remember) and pity (at himself, because this is ridiculous) but there's no missing the way he's side-eyeing the two Bat-mite meals Phoebe has, and the single meal Lonnie has.

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    "Ruining the magic of childhood one statistic at a time -- glad I got that class out of the way." Pheeb comments to Lonnie with a small smile. "But yeah, I can see Nightwing being the most popular one." Phoebe states, pulling out the first plastic packet and -- opening Red Hood.

    "... you ever wonder if they make his face *really* angry under this thing in some way?" she asks, turning the Red Hood action figure and setting it on the table, and she raises his arm and makes a hi-yah! sound, giving a soft tap to Tim's milkshake.

    "What's the principle of changing the outcome by observing it? That's some Quantum level physics that I just don't get."

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    "Well." Lonnie says, before he opens his own meal and says, "Split my meal with me. You usually do. Then you can open my figure and give yourself another chance. But-" He says, "But you have to open this one yourself." He leans back, arm slung across the back of the booth seat as he picks his vanilla milkshake up in one hand and takes a sip of it. "Mm."
    This would explain why he got Chikkin Nuggets.

Tim Drake has posed:
    Is Tim's hand already creeping towards the chikkin nuggets? Nooooo... of course not. But he has set his milkshake down in a very optimal placement so that if he were to do so, he could very easily make it look like he's going for his drink and not for thievery.

    But then Lonnie just goes and offers, so Tim leans over to grab a nuggie. "Deal," he says, then pops the whole thing in his mouth. So he's out of the conversation for a moment, that moment extended when he goes in for some Jokerized fries too. "I think they thought Red Hood would be the most popular one. Edgy. Kids nowadays like that," he says once that moment is over. "But they didn't give him his guns, which was a stupid decision. Look," and he turns Phoebe's figure around. "He's just doing finger-guns, it's ridiculous!"

    After he's used the Batgirl figure to roundhouse kick Red Hood, echoing Phoebe's "hi-yaaah" with one of his own, Tim holds his hand out for the toy from Lonnie's meal.

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    "Oh nooo-- I'm defeated." Phoebe states in a stark tone -- and then pops off Red Hood's boots.

    And tries not to laugh at her own footwork.

    She plucks up a couple of fries and pops one into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. "I dunno. There's enough edge in Gotham that we should have band-aids and neosporin everywhere like hand sanitizer. Nightwing's generally seen as The Good One an' also involved with the Titans, high profile both in front and behind." she remarks, eyebrows rising up as she picks up her second packet, and peers inside.

    "... oooh I see hair." she murmurs. "... man now I want a milkshake."

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    "If you look at his eyes, he's winking, too." Lonnie says, before he hands over the toy, putting it in the palm of Tim's hand. "I think that the Robin figure looks like he caught a whiff of something nasty, but maybe that's just the expression the kid usually has on his face?" He shrugs, and then takes Tim's burger for himself, and takes a bite out of it. He rolls it around in his mouth, before he swallows it.

Tim Drake has posed:
    Hair means a one-in-three chance of the toy being Robin, if life were fair and the odds were even. Tim's almost certain the odds aren't even, though, and with no hesitation he tears through the bag Lonnie hands over... to reveal another Batgirl. Who he uses to team up on Red Hood, roundhouse kicking him while he's down (and also bootless).

    "Here," Tim says, placing his milkshake on Phoebe's tray and then immediately snatching up Lonnie's milkshake to take a sip. "Think I owe you for a smoothie a while back." Then he flashes a bright smile at Lonnie to compensate, and also... you know, doesn't drink all of the milkshake. Only a little bit. Sharing is caring. "So much edge," he agrees, even as he repositions both Batgirl figures so that they're high-fiving over Red Hood's downed figure.

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    "Yep. Sounds appropriate for Nightwing to be winking, even in toy format." Phoebe states, and then she opens her packet the rest of the way to reveal -- RED ROBIN!

    She sets the Red Robin on the table, and wrinkles her nose as she bites into one of the burgers.

    "Now the question... after two bean burgers, am I gonna feel lucky?" she questions, looking back up to the counter, and then to the collection of the bat family high-fiving over poor unfortunate Red Hood as she looks over to the shake placed on her tray. "... ohmigod. What's a smoothie between siblings? I didn't even have an ostrich." she comments quizically, and then arranges Red Robin like he's holding onto the straw of the shared sibling milkshake. "Such Edge. Much Emo. Wow." she attempts to imitate Tim's Red Robin voice in agreement with... himself.

    "... and I dunno about Robin's expression. Never seen him. Can't wait until Osprey gets a toy, though. I'll need more houseplants."

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    "You know what. These meals aren't very filling. I'm still hungry. How about you, Tim? Still hungry?" He gets up, goes over to the counter, and buys... three more meals. Sans drink. None of which are a falafel burger. He brings them back, and sets them down between him and Tim, and then nudges the first bag toward Tim, and he raises his eyebrows. "We can eat them on the way back to Gotham." He says, before he leans back, re-assuming his louche repose.
    "You might as well open the toys now, though."

Tim Drake has posed:
    Tim nods along with Phoebe's statement RE: Nightwing, and while they're on the topic of expressions, he offers up a "I bet he's scowling," of this mysterious, never seen Robin figure. "That's the only thing I can imagine on his face."

    The quantity of chikkin nuggies on the table have slowly diminished over time, but even disappointed, Tim's still playing with the toys. And yes, he is in fact 21 years old, an adult in everything but the ability to rent cars. Red Robin turns at the waist to spin his staff around (the action figure, not... actually Tim) and now one Batgirl is left hanging as the other one has been knocked out.

    "Starving," says Tim immediately, and he creeps to the edge of his seat as he waits for Lonnie to return with three, THREE! whole new Bat-mite meals. The way Tim eagerly rips through each bag that is handed to him doesn't waver until the last one, when he dumps an indeed-winking Nightwing onto the table along with two frowning Batmen. "Oh my god this is so much food," he groans as he sinks down into his seat.

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    "Just for that -- I bet a home-made pan of brownies that in spite of all evidence to the contrary, they're making him smile because it's a kid's toy." Phoebe states, and she goes to her feet and pulls out her wallet.

    "I can always swing by and drop off some extra food to some friends of mine." she states, going to get another two Bat Mite Meals. One with Falafel, one with Chikken. She was curious about the chikken. It sang to her... in fake clucks.

    "Either of you want anything else?"

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    "Well, you know what?" Lonnie says, "I collected a Red Robin, so I'm pretty happy." He shrugs his shoulders, and then he eats a fry. "You'll get one eventually. It's statistically improbable that you won't." Lonnie says, "The fact that you haven't so far is just a fluke." He picks up a fry, and sticks it in Tim's mouth. Or failing that, maybe up his nose. "No, I'm good. How about you, Tim?"

Tim Drake has posed:
    "No more for me," Tim says with a soft groan, and then tips his head back so he can chomp the fry Lonnie holds out to him rather than it going up his nose. He doesn't want to know how badly Jokerized seasoning burns if it goes up your nose. Because he suspects the answer is A Lot.

    He polishes off the chikkin nuggets and steals Lonnie's milkshake again for another sip, and then after that they're just waiting for Phoebe to return with her last attempts at claiming a Robin toy. Er, with her Bat-mite meals. That are totally going to be eaten!

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    Phoebe returns, and specifically sticks her tongue out at Lonnie. "Yeah," she grins, "you got the ultra-rare," she replies, picking up and taking another bite out of the black bean burger as she pulls out the two packages.

    "All right. So not strictly cheating --" she states, and she holds both packets in her hands, in front of her as she closes her eyes.

    "Let's finish our quest, resolve the missing songbird, please not another Red Hood." she states, and then sets the two packets down, lifting the further one with her left hand, and opening it up.

Lonnie Machin has posed:
    Lonnie shrugs his shoulders, and looks on. He gestures with one hand. "Go ahead." He says, "Open the last one."

Tim Drake has posed:
    Well, it's not another Red Hood! Tim goes for the other bag on the table, only to reveal... another him. He actually laughs at that, a little wheezy, but genuine. "This is insane. I'm insane. Oh my god, I am going to lose my mind over a plastic toy."

    Either way, it's time to go. Tim at least helps gather up all the food, sorting it so that Phoebe can take it to her friends. That, or the three of them scarf it down on the long drive home from Bludhaven. Who knows what will happen.

    And yes, he takes the toys with him too.

Phoebe Beacon has posed:
    As soon as the trio leaves Batburger, Phoebe is going to use her Red Robin toy to karate-chop Tim, with the wheezing giggling whispers of:

    "Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."