14453/Walking The Shark

Walking The Shark
Date of Scene:	19 March 2023
Location:	Central Park
Synopsis:	Gwenpool runs into Doreen. They talk business and Jeff and the Squirrels ruin someone's day.
Cast of Characters:	Gwendolyn Poole, Doreen Green

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Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Spring is rapidly approaching in New York City. The birds are coming back, leaves are budding on the trees. People are out more, trying to enjoy the nicer weather.

Some are having a better time of it than others.

A dog walker with at least six prissy little fluffballs is struggling to contain them as half of them seem to go berserk in fury, barking and snarling while the other half are trying to flee. Flee from what?

Gwendolyn Poole and her pet Jeff. Jeff is the cutest little shark with legs. He's not bothing anyone! Gwen isn't dressed to murder today, thankfully. She's wearing a pair of black tights under pink running shorts, white and pink sneakers, and a white hoodie with a pink Fantastic Four logo on it.

She seems happy, if a little manic, but that's normal.

Doreen Green has posed:
"When the liiiights... goo out... in the city!" Screings (that's screaming and singing) Doreen Green as she skips down the street. She hops in one direction, then turns with a kick of her foot, to hop in another direction. A group of squirrels have joined the poorly choriographed dance routine. Led by a very enthusiastic Monkey Joe with his itty bitty squirrelly top hat.

"I don't know, the rest..." She screings, to the same tune, but not same words.

Suffice that the poor dog walker being drug around by a pack of fluffy bitches is having to wrangle control of the animals when a whole parade of squirrels nearly sends the canines into a top spin!

And one giant floofy tailed Squirrel Girl!

She sees Gwen... she sees Jeff... "OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S A SHARK!" And turns to immediately run in the oposite direction, "EVERYBODY OUT OF THE WATER, THERE'S A SHARK!" Recreating the very iconic scene from Jaws, expect for on a sidewalks in Central Park.

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
For the first time in her life, Gwen was about to be content just to keep going. To let the dogs go berserk and keep going with her very (somehow) smiley pet.

Then the singing reaches her ears. She looks around, blue eyes scanning for the source, and she sees it. The squad of dancing squirrels. The tiny top hat. The young woman with the enormous bushy tail and a lot of enthusiasm for everything. Gwen points, looking at Jeff.

"Holy shit, it's Squirrel Girl! C'mon Jeff, let's go say hi!"

This will either end in tragedy or triumph. Hard to say which is which.

She starts to run towards Doreen, Jeff's litle legs scampering to keep up. She skids to a stop, almost complete with sound effect, near Monkey Joe, who Jeff eyes in a very sharklike manner.

"No eating squirrels, Jeff. She'll kick our asses if you do," she asides to her pet before she beams at Doreen. "You're Squirrel Girl! You're -awesome-, you kick literally everyone's ass!"

Doreen Green has posed:
Gwen and Jeff earn a long stare from Doreen who pauses in her playful retreat long enough to stare between Woman and Shark with rapidly shifting back and forth action. "Oh heck'doodle do, you're Gwen Poole!" A finger wiggles in her direction, "Yeah.. yeah I've seen your twitter feed!" The squirrel's are running the dogs in circles, dragging the man behind them kicking and screaming. Who's walking who Kyle?!

Monkey Joe climbs up doors leg and side to perch on her shoulder, chittering down at Jeff. "That's rude, Joe.. Don't mind him, he's never seen a Landshark before." She holds up an acorn to her companion, this seems to settle his nervousness in favor of trying to crack the shell with his head.

"So are you old Gwen or did you get a new player?"

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Jeff, for his part, is a pretty polite Landshark. When Gwen tells him not to eat the squirrels, he looks disappointed and sits like an obedient dog. Those black eyes are shifting about, obviously considering trouble.

Gwen beams at Doreen. "I'm the same Gwen ... Somebody else is driving, though. Whatever that means." She shrugs, obviously not caring what that meant. "I do feel a little less pushy lately. Maybe that has something to do with it."

Gwen looks at where the Camera would be and makes a face. You know the one.

"So, uh..." Gwen says, trying to make small tal. "...Wait, you follow my Twitter!? THAT'S SO COOL! Do -you- have a Twitter!?" She fishes in her hoodie pocket, pulling her phone out. The case is white and pink, with one of those pop socket things that's decorated like her logo. Merchandising.

Doreen Green has posed:
"I'm more of a youtube gal, but I do have a twitter account yeah." Doreen is, sort of, a big deal on youtube maybe you've heard. She grins at the explanation of the change in Gwen and likewise turns towards the camera.. A cheesy, buck toothed, grin. With two fingers extending up above Gwen's head...

Then she goes right back into her previous position and continues the conversation. "Less pushy is good.. or not, I guess some people are pretty into that, ya know? I don't yuck people's yum. Whatever gets the boat ashore, man, I'm for it."

She glances at the pink/white logo phone. "Yooo! I have merch too! I didn't bring my bag or I'd fire off the t-shirt launcher."

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Gwen accepts the bunny ears from the Real Life Celeberty Swuirrel Girl. The immortal Camera will save this forever, and she will cherish it in her heart. Or maybe she just doesn't notice. As any good Zoomer, Gwen's thumb flies across her phone, following Doreen's Twitter AND YouTube immediately. She squints as the Algo tries to reccommend yet another Five Nights at Freddy's lore video, but she just closes the app.

"...I should get merch. ... Merch that I make money from." She suddenly deflates for a second. "Being broke sucks."

It's gone quickly. After all, she's only broke because ammo and swords are expensive. And she buys whatever else catches her whim. ... It's her fault she's broke.

"And, yeah it's ... whatever year it is. Consenting individuals can do whatever filthy acts at a reasonable price that they want."

Doreen Green has posed:
"All you have to do is say 'good game'." Doreen agrees, hands up in a shrug with a pouty lipped mock frown, "I don't make the rules, I just follow them whenever they suit my needs." As for merch, "Well, lemme interest you in a fancy Squirrel Girl official t-shirt and a pair of patten pending cotton blend underpants featuring my likeness!" She reaches for her- "Oh, right, I forgot my bag. Well consider it already in the mail."

Her hands rest on her hips.

A pack of squirrels rush behind her.

Followed by the dogs dragging the screaming man covered in knicks and bruises. "OH GOD HELP ME!"

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Gwen, and Jeff, watch the mob of squirrels chase the man and the pack of tiny dogs. She smirks and Jeff's finned tail wags, looking up as if to say 'Can I join?" She looks at Jeff for a second and sighs. "Okay. Just don't eat the squirrels, and those dogs aren't very nutritious." She reaches down and unclips the leash, Jeff bolting off after the squirrels, dog and man.

Gwen smiles at Doreen. "Oh, well, when they arrive, I'll just take a selfie in them and tag you on Twitter, it'll help with your reach!" She pauses. "...I should be an influencer -and- a mercenary!"

Doreen Green has posed:
Doreen watches Jeff run off to play with the mutts and squirrels...

Then back to Gwen, "The world of internet famedom is a battlefield. A mercenary will do well!" She steps over to drape her arm around her shoulder, "Heck, maybe we can even do some colab work!" Walking along while the animals play.

The human bounces across the sidewalk, dogs now running AWAY from Jeff and the Squirrels chasing them. "I HAVE SO MUCH LOVE TO GIVE!"

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Gwen listens to Doreen and nods. She is, after all, an expert in comparison. "I can do, like, product revires," she says. Her eyes suddenly light up. "In my underwear! Simps love that stuff!"

Jeff is honestly just happy to run, tearing after the squirrels and the dogs, jaws full of pointy teeth wide open, tongue flapping along as it hangs out. He's a good boy.

Her head swivels immediately, blue eyes wide. "C-collabs!? Those are so good for engagement! ... Did ... did we just become friends!?"

Doreen Green has posed:
"The very best of friends!" Doreen squeezes Gwen's shoulders as if they've known each other for years! "So, here's my card." It's held up between two fingers and held out to the pink/white mercenary. "You give me a call anytime and we'll work out details on what we'll do for the colab? My manager, Tippy-Toes, usually handles negotiations, but she's always got me working for peanuts."

"HELP ME GOD!" The screams are muffled, comically banging against a tree as the squirrels chase two of the dogs in oposite directions, chittering angrily after them!

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
That's how these things go. Mercenary meets Girl with Squirrel Powers and an entourage, then they're best friends for life until the inevitable falling out that only results in one of them dying, leaving, or thre's the other outcome.

CENSORED

Gwen takes the card and stares at it for a moment. "Look at that subtle off-white coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God, it even has a watermark..." Gwen is probably just quoting something. Either way, she tucks the card in her phone case. "Yeah! I'll call soon. I'm ... between contracts right now, so I need to figure out a new hustle."

Doreen Green has posed:
"Did you just quote American Psycho?" Doreen stares at Gwen with ever widening eyes, to anime rediculousness. Her hands are clinched together with her knuckles resting under chin, if she randomly started speaking cuties UwU Japanese... that's the only way it could be any more intentionally diabetically sweet adorable.

"I think I have JUST the thing! Come come, let's go discuss BUSINESS!" Arm back around Gwen, headed towards the exit of the park.

"I'VE NEVER DRANK BAILES FROM A SHOOOOOE!" The man is drug away by his animals being chased by squirrels.

Gwendolyn Poole has posed:
Gwen, the Unbelievable Gwenpool, beams at Doreen. "People usually run away when I quote that movie. Though it's proooobably because I usually have an axe and am screaming 'Try to get a reservation at Dorsia now, you stupid bastard!'"

She is struck by the woobie, blushing just a little bit. It's cute, she can't help it. When she brings up business, she whistles, and Jeff stops chasing. "Jeff! Go on home, I've got some things to do. You can have one ... no TWO sewer rats on the way. I'll know if you have more!" She shakes her finger at the landshark who starts trotting off, heading the direction they'd come from.

"Alright, business! Maybe I'll be able to get that Fifty Bee Emm Gee!"