3668/Welcome Back!

Welcome Back!
Date of Scene:	03 October 2020
Location:	Penthouse - Kord Co
Synopsis:	Booster Gold throws a welcome back party for... himself, at Blue Beetle's penthouse. Huntress literally drops in on the party, and hilarity ensues.
Cast of Characters:	Booster Gold, Ted Kord, Helena Bertinelli

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Booster Gold has posed:
It's an incredibly busy sight, here, in Ted's private penthouse -- long tables decked with copious amounts of food line the back wall, decorations from streamers to balloon arches adorn the doorways and walls -- the works. In the middle of the room is your time-traveling superhero, Booster Gold, currently in the middle of a conversation with a young man dressed like a server. Booster has his hands on his waist, and blows out a hard breath.

"Look, Jonathan, you're breakin' my balls here, okay? Look at these California rolls -- is this /imitation/ crab meat? IMITATION CRAB MEAT?!"

"Mr. Gold, sir, with all due respect, that's what you pa--"

"I don't care what it is I PAID for, man -- I care about what T-DAWG'S gonna think when he bites into one of these suckers and goes, 'Well, that's clearly not real crab meat.' How do you think I'll look, Jonathan? 'Cause it won't be good, y'know!"

He sighs again, this time stopping a few uniformed people who are trying to center a giant banner in the middle of the room that says in big, bold letters:

"WELCOME BACK!"

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord settled the Bug in its cradle and powered it down. Muggers with rocket packs. They could have sold the damn packs for more than they made roughing up tourists. The leader was a big one too. With a baton. Ted rubs his shoulders walking over to the elevator. Meh... it's his elevator. He pulls his hood and tunic off and doffs them. Then the pants go because he thinks better in boxer shorts. Still wearing his boots, boxers, and goggles he goes over to the private elevator, boards and hits the only button on the console.

"I am ready for a nice quiet evening at home. I foreswear any further craziness at least till Monday is what."

Not much choice there. Vic is gone, Booster is gone. Everybody is fucking gone.

The doors open and Ted blinks.

"Everybody is fucking here! What the... aaaasaagh!" He runs for his bedroom. "Where's security? Where're my drones? Where are my pants! Aaaaaagh!" a cry worthy of Charlie Brown or Snoopy. "Who's party is this?"

He fell into the Bizarro World is what.

Booster Gold has posed:
And with the ding of the elevator, Booster immediately spins around to greet his beeeesssst fwend. "T-DAWG!" He blinks as Ted goes running for his bedroom, but decides to scream at the closed door. "Security? Gone! Gave 'em the night off. Drones? Gone! Skeets got up in them programming guts. And your pants? Well, I'd say gone, but that's not true. They're in your closet, bottom right corner as always where you hide things you don't think I'll find." He snickers, nervously.

"But as for the party, it's MY party, bro. Look -- I know it's been a while and you've probably been missin' me somethin' fierce, so I figured I'd help you celebrate getting that vitamin-G back in your life by throwing this shindig. Now, 'Pabo,' that Korean/Japanese restaurant that just opened up in Alphabet City? I got them to deliver all the grub, and as for the deco, well -- it's a combination of Party City and Party Town, which sounds like a Party County, know what I'm sayin'?"

Booster then turns to Skeets who zips right over by Booster's shoulder, "Quick, Skeets -- you're recording, right? Let's get a couple sweet reacto-pics for the 'Gram and drop the #AllGoldEverything on it, yeah?"

Ted Kord has posed:
Rummaging. Rummaging. Clatter. Rustle. Kee-rash! "Fuck."

The door is jerked open. ted has his robe on now and what could only be termed a "bluezooka" at hand which he sticks in Booster's face for a moment. "All right you savages! You may get me but I'll go down fighting like my predecessor!"

Blink.

Blink.

"Booster? Booster! What were did you come fro... what the heck is all this?" The barrel of the bluezooka drops away from Booster's face. Then Ted pokes him in the chest with it.

"Who throws a welcome back party for themselves? Where you been? When you been you, big doofus?"

Booster Gold has posed:
Blink.

Blink.

"Bro, yeah, it's me -- who else would have all this done?" His mouth curls to the side in slight confusion, "And what the heck is all this? It's my welcome back, man -- you didn't hear anything I just said? Ugh, screw it." He goes in for a hug and grips Ted tightly, robe and all, "As for where I've been, I've been doing the whole time travel thing! You know, swimmin' through the timestream like a salmon and righting the wrongs that have yet to be done?" He turns to Skeets again, "Quit recording real quick, bud."

<<You got it, sir!">>

"Okay, seriously, I just had to go meet some folks in San Francisco over some new companies I'm trying to add into my portfolio -- tryna take a page outta your book, ya heard?" He clears his throat and nods back to Skeets, whose red light goes back on. "I narrowly DIED, Ted -- like fourteen times, easy, and you know what kept me going? You know what got me through taking on these world-breaking threats?" He releases the hug and then stands next to Ted, draping an arm around his shoulder, "The thought of our friendship. The thought of the good ol' Blue & Gold." He smiles for the camera and holds up an uncomfortably long thumbs-up.

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord sets his weapon back in the bedroom. "No I didn't hear you, I had my head in my closet grabbing the pacifier, here. San Fran... you couldn't call?" Ted elbows his large friend in the ribs. "I thought the Time Police busted you for killing your grandfather or photo bombing Hitler again... or something! I'll give you a welcome back! Could this evening get crazier?" He rubs his eyes.

Booster Gold has posed:
And sure enough, things were going to get crazier. Casually dressed in a tight, white Balenciaga t-shirt and a pair of boot cut jeans is Bordeaux 'Hot Damn' Porterhouse, who walks into Ted's view, sucking on a lollipop. "Hey, Teeeddddd," she says with a devilish wink. Booster leans in to Ted, elbowing him back in the ribs. "Hope you don't mind, big guy. When I mentioned having this surprise party on sosh, today, she got in my DM's sooooooo quick." He clears his throat and turns to Bordeaux with that million-dollar smile. "So, Bordeaux, whatcha got there? What flavor lollipop is that?"

She thinks for a moment, takes it out of her mouth, and -- after a few inexplicable seconds -- she smiles. "Red."

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord smiles at Bordeaux and nods. "Excuse me a moment, Bordeaux." He turns to Booster and whispers, "You're lucky you got a robot witness recording everything, you know that, right?" He slaps Booster's face in a brotherly fashion. See that woman? The one with 'red'... she wants to try for Blue before the evening is out and... better my car horn sticks when I roll up behind the Hulk. I'm only doing this for your social platform so you'll be successful and get your own penthouse."

He turns back to Bordeaux, "Bordeaux, nice to see you@ You're looking well. Yeah. This is my robe."

Booster Gold has posed:
"Oh, I love it, Blue. I have robes, too, y'know," Bordeaux says with a grin, popping her eyebrows up, seductively. "Silk robes are my favorite, because of the way they just... feel on your skin..." She says that last bit as she slowly walks towards Ted, soon getting real close to whisper in his ear. Her understanding of how volume works, however, leaves much to be desired. "Kind of like how water is, like... wet and stuff. You like that, Ted? Huh? Wet water?"

Booster, overhearing this, has a puzzled expression on his face as he turns to shrug at Skeets who appears equally confused -- for a robot, that is. "Hey, uh," Booster says, drawing out the next part. "Anyone up for some California rolls? Huh? Totally real crab, by the way. Jonathan said so. Right, bro?" He points at Jonathan, who -- along with the staff -- have been watching this awkward AF interaction since the beginning.

"Hi! And yup, totally real crab."

Helena Bertinelli has posed:
CRASH! BANG! BIFF! The vigilante HUNTRESS falls from the ceiling with a loud noise and smashes into a cheapass folding table with some crackers all over it arranged neatly in rows by somebody with way too much time. The little cheeses fly up into the air and down onto the HUNTRESS with embarrassing sticking power. She sits up as a GOAT-MAN leaps down after her. He glares down at the HUNTRESS, who sits up slowly and frowns confusedly at the party atmosphere.

Goat-Man is dressed appropriately for an evil villain. He wears a GOAT HEAD and sort of a cute little kilt thing like he's Scottish or something and some Viking furry boots, which are also quite cute. He puts his hands on his hips and looks upset, "More witnesses, I don't mind," he says in a gloating, Scottish tone as he leans over the HUNTRESS. She looks kinda peeved at this asshole, so she takes her heel and plants it into his balls rather forcibly, "Shut up, moron." Goat-Man doubles over in pain.

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord rubs the back of his neck. "Sure, wet water. I drink the stuff all the time. Gee, you're looking really... close. Uhmmm." He makes sure his robe is cinched tight. No tighter. that's good. He pulls suddenly steamed up goggles up to his forehead. They were keeping his eyebrows from shooting up anyway. "So, you still on reality tv? Oh hey yeah, that's your hand on my arm!"

Then Huntress falls through the ceiling, followed by a goat guy in plaid.

Even as Huntress dispatches the creature. He offers Huntress a hand up, "Insert a pun about falling here. I have some standards. Who or what is that guy... don't say Scottish." Bordeaux is forgotten for the moment because he is a professional superhero.

Booster Gold has posed:
"You are UNDER ARREST, bro!" Booster exclaims, dashing towards the doubled-over Goatman and adjusting his positioning for Skeets. He shuffles from one side of Goatman to the other, finally finding his light and give Skeets the a-okay symbol. Gotta get the best shot for the 'Gram, of course. He peers down at Huntress and gives her a smile and wink, "Big shout-out to Batgirl for the legwork, but I'll take it from here. Skeets, call the cops, tell 'em we got a collar."

Booster winks at the camera.

And then he kneels to make a quick Lunchables-style sandwich of crackers, turkey, and cheese.

Helena Bertinelli has posed:
Huntress slowly wobbles to her feet thanks to the Ted's helping hand and she rubs the back of her head.

"What the &&&& Beetle?!" Huntress yells at Ted, "I'm fighting this guy on your roof and you're having....little...f&&&&& cheeses on ....crackers," she says as a little cheese falls off her leather costume, right on cue. It lands on Ted's big toe.

"/HUNTRESS/ you f**#1097J!$ idiot!" Huntress lets out frustratedly as she glares at Booster now and then starts toward him threateningly.

"Grrr...you little..." Goat-Man begins, starting to recover some. Huntress pauses in her procession of death toward Booster and side kicks Goat-Man, sending him flopping over the back of the couch. He lands awkwardly with a grunt.

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord walks after Huntress, "Hey I came home to this but... the hell was the Goat Marauder doing on my roof? And couldn't you yell? What are you mad at me for F***'s sake. Oh... hold on I'm sorry. Huntress, this is Bordeaux Porterhouse, our friend. Bordeaux, this is the Huntress. Definitely not Batwoman or -girl or femme or whatever. Bordeaux is a... what do you do again?" He picks the bit of cheese off his foot. As he rises he sees Goatman come up behind and "Ba-a-a-a-a-a-ah!" menacingly at one of the servers. Excusing himself he riuns and jumps onto Goatman's back and the villain capers around the room and out to the pool! "Nya-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ah!"

"Hey Hun, grab a drink, I'll finish up for you... oh no you don't... get off that table! Oh yeah take th... goats don't bite! Stay the f*** on theme!" There are a few crashes from outside.

Booster Gold has posed:
"Whoa, WHOA! RELAX!" Booster cries as Huntress approaches, slowly walking back with his hands out if front of him to keep some distance. His mouth is still stuffed with crackers, meat, and cheese, by the way. "My bad for not picking up on the branding!" He then peers over at Goatman, wincing as he's kicked and goes flopping over towards the other side of the couch. With a faint hum, Booster readies one of his gauntlets for combat, but it's here that Ted decides to go for a spin on Mr. Goat's Wild Ride.

"Didn't see that coming." Booster blinks as the pair end up out towards the pool, and he decides, instead, to make right with Huntress. He ambles over doing his best Cool Guy Swagger, and theatrically powers down his gauntlet for the vigilante. "Mea culpa on the Batgirl thing, by the way," he offers, running a hand through his hair before blowing out a hard breath. "You want some cheese?"

Helena Bertinelli has posed:
Huntress just puts her hands on her hips looking like she doesn't believe this shit. "I don't believe this shit," she mutters annoyedly, settling back into her usual mood of often-pissed, mostly-annoyed. As she listens to Ted prattle on, she eyes Sasha Bordeau Porterhouse Steak and pushes her over when Huntress is offered a handshake. "Hey!" Sasha lets out in a whiny way. "Good friend of yours, huh?" Huntress wonders.

Huntress opens her mouth to yell at Ted again when Booster saunters up to her, "Got some, jackass," she mutters as another little cheese falls off of her forehead. She looks over Booster's shoulder at Ted trying to corral the Goat-Man, "Will you stop playin around with that guy? He's a Scottish terrorist!" she explains, "We gotta take him in."

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord scatters caterers as he returns through the patio door. The closed one, his arm locked around Goatman's neck. The two continue grappling. Melissa tries to get in closer where she hands Ted a serving tray. "Here, Mr. Kord sir!"

Ted grabs the tray, "Thank... you... bonus... next paycheck!"

Ted slams the tray down on the crook's skull. The tray is actually bent around his skull and held in place it's bent that badly.

"Nya-a-a-a-a... ," the terrorist screams... then he trails off.

Ted pushes him lightly and he falls over.

"I'm paying your rent this year, Melissa." The server squeals and hugs him. She runs to Booster and hugs him! She runs to... she gives Huntress a nod.

Bordeaux looks around blinking. "I have no idea what's going on..."

Helena Bertinelli has posed:
Huntress keeps peering around Booster to see what the hell Ted is doing over there with the evil terrorist she's been tracking. Finally, she holds up a hand and eyes Melissa threateningly as she tries for a hug, then makes a motion for her to 'get the &&&& out of here'.

Huntress walks over to Ted slowly and crosses her arms, nodding at the results of Ted's tray denting, "Good job, Beetle," she comments almost honestly, "But you didn't win the lottery. We still have to call it in," Huntress reminds him helpfully with the right level of annoyance.

Ted Kord has posed:
Ted Kord looks at the terrorist, then Huntress before giving her a little shove. "You call it in he's all yours. He didn't plant any plaid paint bombs, did he? Exploding haggis? Plant Robert Burns literature around here?"

"Hey! WHo'd you think you're shoving b****... Battle Nun or WHATEVER!" Bordeaux suddenly regains some of her usual mouth. The tv star attempts to shove Huntress back.

Melissa, with supreme grace, plops a full wine glass in Ted's hand. "Sir."

Evidently she's trying to get another year's rent or a promotion.

Helena Bertinelli has posed:
Huntress frowns at Ted, "Stop," she says and takes something from her battle belt and tappity tap taps a secret code to dial in the report to the police.

Huntress sighs because she's probably going to end up on "When Celebrities Attack". The little secret dialer FLIES out of her hand when the TV Star pushes her and the little thing skids across the ground, underneath Ted to the other side of the room, "Stop, you fat b**ch!" she yells at the TV star. She stomps off to find the little dialer, "I am SO outta here. Where'd that f****** thing go?! DAMMIT BEETLE!" she lets out.

Booster Gold has posed:
Booster's been pawing at his plate of finger-food for the last two minutes or so, leaning over towards Melissa who's returned to give him a glass of wine. "Did she just body-shame Bordeaux?" He shakes his head with that parental tsk-tsk leaving his lips. "Hashtag: do better." Booster then sighs and takes a gulp of wine, carefully walking over the broken tables and piles of wasted food, taking a mental count of how much money he's blown on this.

"Not to be that guy, but 5-0's already on their way," he says to Huntress as she stomps off to find her phone. He soon puts an arm around a steaming Bordeaux and gestures over towards Ted, sighing.

"Man, it's good to be back," he says with a smile. "Hey, you a fan of imitation crab meat?"