3705/An Assassin Hunts an Assassin Who Gets Killed By An Assassin

An Assassin Hunts an Assassin Who Gets Killed By An Assassin
Date of Scene:	06 October 2020
Location:	Warehouses - Chinatown
Synopsis:	Wade Wilson kills an assassin who tries to assassinate him, Strix is hunting that assassin and instead tries to assassinate Wade Wilson. He gets her into a stalemate and convinces her to eat snacks and watch the Rush Hour series. He has likely made an enemy of the Court of Owls without even realizing it.
Cast of Characters:	Wade Wilson, Strix

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Wade Wilson has posed:
No one really knows what Wade's deal is recently. He's just been very lazy, freeloading, relaxing, doing whatever. Right now he's holed himself up in a warehouse in Chinatown. He offerred to work security but really he just wanted to make a comfortable hole for himself to relax in.

It's a great deal, a warehouse full of cheap Wish merch that Wade has free reign in, because he's the security guard!

So he sits on a beanbag chair, wearing an unlicensed hoodie covered in Nickelodeon characters, some jean shorts, and some bunny slippers. He has a TV set up in front of him while he eats chips while surrounded by crates on all sides of him.

The assassin that Strix is tracking, one Joe 'The Wire Shark' Hanks has already come to assassinate Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool, but Joe is now a bloody foot rest that Wade has his feet on top of. "Nikki Parker, you so crazy!" he laughs at the TV, apparently watching The Parkers.

Strix has posed:
Strix has been tracking The Wire Shark for a few days, now, waiting for an opportune moment to strike. Like a lot of the criminal elements in Gotham, none of them move without the knowledge or consent of the Court, and Joe has outstayed his welcome. She's located her mark at this warehouse. He went in about thirty minutes ago and hasn't come out yet. Strange.

Moving silently, she hops lightly from rooftop to rooftop until she's on top of Wade's warehouse. Carefully placing her steps so as not to alert anybody inside the house she peers though one of the many skylights to see that Joe is laying prostrate on the ground, being used by a guy in a hoodie and jorts as a footstool.

Odd.

Still. Everybody has their kinks, and Strix is not one to judge. She quietly opens the skylight and drops down, swords first, to land on him, one sword sunk cleanly through his skull, and the other the spine without noticing that Joe is already quite dead. If he wasn't, well, he is now.

Wade Wilson has posed:
Wade suddenly tosses his bag of chips everywhere when Strix drops down, pulling his legs up into the beanbag chair when a sword goes right through the man's skull. "That gives a whole new meaning to a double murder." he observes, eyes wide in shock.

Then he holds up a finger as he pulls out a second bag of chips for one thigh, and a gun for the other thigh. "You're here for him, not me, right? Trying to decide if you're joining me for chips or if we're going to shoot and stab each other. I have no idea who that guy is, by the way."

Strix has posed:
A cock of her head is Strix's reply, showing a bit of confusion at the situation, but as soon as the gun is out, the girl is in motion. She ducks to the side, pulling the sword from Joe's head and swings at Wade's gun arm, aiming to disarm him. Literally.

Were she any other assassin, they probably would have stayed for chips, but the Court isn't in the habit of leaving witnesses to their crimes, so this guy has to be taken care of.

Wade Wilson has posed:
Wade suddenly raises his arm, to find that she's entirely slides it off. "Whoa, holy shit!" He grabs his forearm and suddenly rolls backward as he holds his arm halves together, allowing them to regenerate back to each other.

"So you're saying that you //don't// want to watch the Parkers with me?" he asks, before looking around at the crates, then kicks the hell out of one into exploding.

It's a bunch of cheaply made katanas from China, of which he grabs two and starts rapidly spinning and swinging them around. "You seem //really// cool, I think we could definitely hang out, make refried bean dip, Netflix and chill."

Strix has posed:
Strix's puzzlement only grows as she watches Wade just reattaches his arm. This is now how she expected this fight to go, and she leaps back out of the way of the box splintering.

This gives her opponent a chance to arm himself with katanas. She hunkers down for a moment, watching Wade go through his katas, calculating. They're longer than hers, so he has the reach advantage, but that shouldn't slow her down.

She waits for an opening before darting in to strike, with a sword of her own, and parry with the other.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"I mean it doesn't have to be the Parkers. We could watch Pawn Stars! Very fake, but fun!" Wade goes running for her, but instead of going for the rational move that one might expect, he instead impales himself on her sword to get her sword stuck in his body, and then swings both of his katanas like a pair of scissors, trying to trap her in position for decapitation.

But he stops short, just trying to get her in checkmate.

"I've got ice cream too, there's a mini fridge around here somewhere." he suggests as blood slowly drips from his mouth. "You could tell me your innermost thoughts, I'll tell you my innermost thoughts. It'll be great. The dead guy can be the foot rest."

Strix has posed:
Strix almost doesn't get her other sword up in time in between Wade's katanas, she's so shocked that he just /impaled/ himself on her sword. And he's talking like nothing is happening. She knows that she could probably pull off this maneuver herself and survive, but it wouldn't be something she could just talk her way out of.

So she stands there, in the kind of stalemate that they're in, and takes a look at who's she's fighting. Actually take a /look/. She sees something familiar there. A man, horribly disfigured, who regenerates more rapidly than she does. Who is just as mouthy as she is silent.

She grunts and leaps away, swords held out ready, but this is a defensive stance. She's unsure if she can take this target, so she warily waits for Wade to make the next move.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Very nice moves, though you don't //have// to impress me, you can just ask to hang out." Wade kicks open another crate, and pulls a bright yellow bean bag out to sit next to his, then he plops back down and tosses her a bag of chips. "Relax, get that mask off, have some chips. You seem like a Rush Hour marathon kinda girl."

His stomach has already healed, instead of attacking he he's fluffing the empty beanbag chair for her. "Don't worry, they hired me as security. I'm not actually doing the job but I wanted to mark 'sleep in a warehouse and use all of their cheap knockoff merchandise' from my bucket list."

Strix has posed:
This is.... unusual. She isn't quite sure what to do at this point. This strange man is talking to her like a person, not as an opponent to fight, or a tool to be used, but an actual person. This hasn't happened since she was just a little girl.

Her swords still point at Wade as he talks, and fluffs the beanbag chair, still unsure as to what to do. The smart thing would be to just leave, but Wade /did/ mention ice cream. That's another thing that hasn't happened to her since she was a little girl.

Hesitantly, cautiously, she sheathes her swords and makes her way to the offered chair. She moves like a wild animal encountering a friendly human for the first time. Cautiously interested, but ready to flee at a moments notice. She slowly settles down into the chair, and looks at Wade, waiting for his next move.

Wade Wilson has posed:
Wade proceeds to navigate an app on his phone, and suddenly the first Rush Hour film is playing on the flat TV haphazardly lodged against a wall of crates. Then he opens the mini fridge and out comes a tub of vanilla bean ice cream. "It's perfect for dipping your chips into, but I'm watching my figure, so we'll just eat directly from the tub with spoons."

He sits the ice cream in between them and offers one of the spoons from a pack he has opened. "Wade Wilson. My enemies and admirers call me Deadpool. And you are?"

Strix has posed:
Strix takes the spoon and now has a conundrum. She's not supposed to take her mask off to /anybody/. Yet, there is ice cream. She looks from the spoon to the tub of ice cream, then up to Wade and the ice cream wins out.

Slowly, like she hasn't done this in a long time, she peels of the hood of her costume, showing her face. Horribly scarred brown skin and black hair poke haphazardly out of white gauze that she's wrapped around herself to help hide the scars. The real surprise would be her age. She doesn't look like she's old enough to vote, much less be an expert assassin.

When asked for her name, she just shakes her head silently, and taps at her throat.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Wow, weeooweeooo, FBI open up! We're keeping you strictly on ice cream and chips. Definitely none of this." Wade holds a six pack dangling from his fingers, then shakes his head and tosses it away.

At the gesture, he's digging around "Oh wait, what am I thinking, of course..." He goes to the pile of tablets and phones, digging through it until he finds a functional tablet, and tosses that to her. "Write with this! Should be a stylus in there."

Strix has posed:
Strix stares at the tablet for a moment, before taking a claw and scratches it on the screen, making horrible sounds. When she's done she holds up the tablet, grinning at her work. There, in big block letters that looks like a 7 year old made them is the name: MARY

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Not //quite// what I meant, but Mary, nice name." Wade leans over to turn her tablet on, poking around at it until he takes the stylus out. "You're pretty young for the assassin game, but I guess it's only fair, with the X-Men and Titans and all the teen heroes around. Teen assassins are probably like the universe balancing itself out."

When he gets it to the writing screen, he shows it to her, then scribbles the stylus over it, though it's a bit harder with her fresh claw marks. "Give //that// a try, a lot easier than the caveman thing."

Strix has posed:
Mary looks absolutely delighted when Wade shows her how to work the tablet, eyes crinkling and breaking out into a wide grin. She takes the tablet back, and carefully scribbles something out on it. Turning it around it says, "ICE CREEM"

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Yeah! Stabbing and shooting is fun, but sometimes you have to sit back and just enjoy the ice cream." Wade digs up a spoonful, then hands the already fully loaded spoon over to her. "Go nuts!"

"See, whoever you work for, you gotta remember, //we're// the mercs and assassins. They might be paying us, but we have all the swords and bombs. They're just squishy people with money. You know what that means? That's right." He nods to the spoon. "Ice cream, whenever we want!"

Strix has posed:
Mary takes the spoon and stuffs it in her mouth, eyes rolling up in pleasure. She hasn't tasted anything like this in over half a century. She strictly doesn't need to eat, being technically undead and all, but there are just some things in life you can't pass up. Things like ice cream.

She scowls as Wade goes on about who really has control over whom. These are dangerous thoughts for somebody whose only ties to their employers is merely loyalty, when you get down to it. She thinks about this for a minute (after getting herself another joyful spoonful of ice cream) before writing down on the tablet:

THEY ARE HOME

Wade Wilson has posed:
"First of all, home is where the heart is. Is your heart sending you out to assassinate people?" Wade wonders, before tossing a BBQ chip at her mouth. "Not that I'm judging, but... you might be able to do better."

He lays back in his chair, continuing to toss chips into his mouth while Rush Hour plays for them. "Now, me, when I do assassinations, I then get wired a very large sum of money into my bank account, and then I can eat ice cream and watch movies all day."

Pointing at her, he asks, "Which is more fun, cold, calculating assassinations because the people at home //said so//, or a fun, //sloppy// assassination where you get to come back and eat ice cream with a cool guy like me?"

Strix has posed:
Mary catches the chip before it hits her mouth, not understanding that she's supposed to catch it /with/ her mouth. She brings it up to her nose and sniffs it, and winces at it's strong, tangy aroma. They didn't have potato chips like these back when she was young. She watches as Wade just tosses them into the air and pops them into his mouth, and so she follows suit. She chews thoughtfully, and renders her verdict.

I LIEK CHIPS

She stays silent while Wade tries to win her to the dark side of the force. Or light side. It's hard to tell when you're talking with amoral assassins. What he's saying makes sense, but it conflicts with decades of programming. This makes her shift uncomfortably in the bean bag chair.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Don't you worry about it right now. Just remember that you can use your awesome assassin training to come and find me whenever you want. Or call me to help you with your daring emancipation if you ever decide you need one." Wade tosses a card over to her. It's a fancy red and black card that says DEADPOOL in large yellow letters. With the tagline: 'Mercenary, and all around nice guy, amazing cuddler, sliding scale prices, sometimes just does a good deed'.

"Right now just eat and watch Rush Hour! Anyone who interrupts us gets decapitated." he decides, and gets a spoon full of ice cream himself.