4899/Ill Advised Career Counseling.

Ill Advised Career Counseling.
Date of Scene:	27 January 2021
Location:	Two-Face Goon's Lair: Gotham
Synopsis:	Strix goes to Deadpool to get some advice. Shenanigans happen.
Cast of Characters:	Wade Wilson, Strix

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Wade Wilson has posed:
The sounds of gunfire are nothing new in Gotham, this time emanating from a safehouse run by Two-Face, little more than a dumpy apartment with the odd Gemini or coin-related decor here and there. But usually when gunfire stops the one getting shot doesn't sound so cheery. "Good aim on you two. You on the other hand, what the Hell man? You emptied that whole clip and only hit me three times. Have you seen an optometrist?" Deadpool questions, hands on his hips, bullet holes in his chest.

The third of the three shooters meanwhiles stammers a bit, all three men in fact staring in shock at the still moving and talking Deadpool, then as one beginning to shakily reload their guns. At this Deadpool throws his hands up in the air.

"Really?! I admire the committment but I would think it's pretty obvious by now that ain't cutting it fellas! Oh speaking of cutting it..." In the next 20 seconds the two men with the decent aim are dead and the third has a swordpoint pressed to his throat. "Now then, what are we going to do?"

"I, I'll go see the doc, I'll get glasses. I promise!" the thug stammers out.

"Good man, outta here," Deadpool relenting, the man stumbling forward to rub at his throat and then dashing out the door, Deadpool only thwacking him on the ass with the flat of his blade as he runs by. "And tell Two Face when I'm done with him he's gonna need to start carrying some dice! Cause I'm gonna, you know, screw his face up even...he'll get it!"

Strix has posed:
Ever since she heard that Deadpool is back in town, Strix has been keeping an ear out for him. It's only when she's sent out on a mission from the Court does she have a little bit of leeway to actually hunt him down. It's no surprise to find him here, doing his thing, and she hung back while he did his job, not wanting to interfere. Now that it's all over with, she silently steps out of the shadows and approaches him, hesitating on how to announce her presence without having him just try to kill her out of reflex.

She ends up making sure she's outside of sword range to clap her hands to get his attention. When she does, she gives him a cheery wave.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Now we fridge raid. C'mon leftover Chinese I am counting on...hello?" Wade distracted by the clap as he spins about to see a black masked figure in the corner waving with undue cheer at him. For just a moment he sounds like a child about to meet Santa. "Batman is that..." his hands rising to his cheeks only for it to finally click.

"No wait, Batman doesn't have breasts. Yet. MARY!" Deadpool joyously cries out and now it's him who might have to worry about reflexive defensive actions as he rushes her and looks to grab her around the hips to lift and twirl her around the small dingy apartment. "My main murder mute Mary. How are ya kid? Still quiet as ever. Alley oop," Wade setting her down on the kitchen counter and then pressing a finger to where her mouth might be under her mask. "Shhh just a sec. Uncle Deadpool needs a sandwich," he confides in her, shushing a mute girl of all things as he turns back to the fridge, making a show of bending over and shaking his ass as he sorts through the gangsters' groceries.

Strix has posed:
There's an odd croaking sound coming from the young woman as she's lifted up and twirled around. After a while it can be recognized as Strix's laughter. She pulls off her hood so that Deadpool can see her face when they "talk." She crosses her feet once she's on the counter, and idly swings her legs, much like what a child would do if they were in the same situation. She peers across the counter, and finding a bowl of fruit, pulls it over and pulls out a banana. She peels and eats it while she watches Deadpool get himself something to eat.

When he's finally done, she pulls out a small notepad that's been slightly crumpled for having been hidden in her costume for so long, and a felt tip marker. She scribbles something down on it and shows it to him.

NEED UR HELP

Wade Wilson has posed:
The bottom half of Deadpool's mask is pulled up revealing his scarred lower jaw but the top remains on for now anyway as he turns back from the fridge, kicking it closed behind him, half a wrapped sub and a bottle of scotch in his hands. Stepping up to Strix he takes a bite out of the sub as he leans forward to examine the note, speaking with his mouth full, "Halp? Whas kinda halp ush..." pausing to swallow at last, clearing his voice up. "What kind help you need kiddo? You're pretty good at the whole murder thing, that usually solves most problems. Bite?" offering the other end of the sandwich to her as he holds it up, leaning back against the counter next to her.

Strix has posed:
Strix holds up a hand and shakes her head no to the sandwich. She looks back down to the notepad and scribbles down some more words.

WANT 2 LEAVE
COURT
HOW?

Wade Wilson has posed:
Deadpool looks down at the note and purses his lips a moment, then takes a swig from the hooch, setting it back with a clank on the counter. "The Court, those assholes you work for? The ones that train child murderers and all? Well, look kid, you gotta think like the assassin folk hero that is John Wick," Deadpool having apparently decided a folk hero is a movie character less than 10 years old as he sets the sandwich down so he can uses his hands in a more expressive manner. "See I'm guessing you can't run and just fade away cause, like it or not Mary, you're like me, you got a pretty...distinctive mug there," Deadpool confides, reaching out to rub a thumb along one of her scarred cheeks. "So either you tear their whole damn system down, which I am 100% with you on if you want, I've got C4 begging to be detonated. Or, you buy your way out. Give them something they want more than you. Find em a better assassin, kill someone they want dead but don't think can be killed. Make them an offer. That's how Wick did it till they killed his dog. Then you GOTTA tear it all down," Deadpool explains with a solemn nod of his head, and a new crunch of his stolen sandwich.

Strix has posed:
There's a tilt of the head at the mention of John Wick, a silent question asking who he is. When Deadpool tries to run a thumb down her cheek, she tries not to flinch away from the contact. If anybody in the world can understand what it's like to be horribly marred it'd be the man standing in front of him.

She nods, as he gives her advice, internalizing it. Tear it down. She frowns. She doesn't think she can offer anything valuable enough to buy her freedom. The Court just doesn't work like that, but tearing it down just might work. She has an idea.

*scribble scribble*
WOOD
BATMAN HELP?

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Batman does seem to roll with a lot of misfit kids who kick people in the face, you might be right up his alley. And I mean, I GUESS he knows this city better or something," Deadpool doing his best not to sound offended that she wasn't looking to HIM for help on this part. He was failing badly, hiding his feelings wasn't a strong suit. The bottle of booze is lifted up and handed to her. "C'mon, I know you're underage but I think you need the pick me up. You even had booze before? Ooh please, give it a try," Deadpool pleads, staring at her with rapt attention. Though he always seemed to be staring the way his mask was designed.

Strix has posed:
Strix looks somewhat surprised that Deadpool took it personally. She leans over and pats him gently on the shoulder to comfort him. When he offers her booze however she hesitantly takes the bottle and gives it a sniff. She recoils at the smell of it, not expecting the alcoholic fumes to burn her nose quite like it did.

She gives Deadpool a 'What are you crazy?' kind of look before chugging down a huge swallow of the stuff. She simply isn't prepared for the potency of the brew. She starts coughing violently, putting a hand on her chest as she feels the burning sensation run all the way down her throat into her stomach.

When she finally gets it under control, she hands the bottle back to Deadpool, tears streaming down her face. After he takes it, she shakes her head violently, and waves her hands, crossing them over each other in a definitive negative motion.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Ahh nothing better than a girl's first time! You get used to it sweetheart believe me. And if you're sticking with this business you're gonna be doing a a lot more drinking before you're done," Wade assures her as he takes the bottle back, pats her hard on the back, and then and downs twice as much as she had in a go and slams the bottle down with a clunk and a belch.

"Woo! Alright lets see if they had anything good in here. You know Two Face? He kinda looks like me only half as good looking? Took a job with the guy and he only paid half. Getting real sick of this gimmick crap this city is so full of. Kingpin never tries and pays me with goddamn bowling trophies or any shit like that," Deadpool complains as he unsheathes his katanasa and starts cutting open cabinetry, furniture, and anything else he thinks might be hiding valuables.

Strix has posed:
Well this seems like fun. She's not entirely sure *why* Deadpool is cutting stuff up, but she wants to be helpful since Deadpool has been so kind to her. (Except for the alcohol part. That was pretty cruel.) So she pulls out her own swords and starts cutting stuff up, too! Couch? HYAH! Take that! Oh look! There's a painting. HAH! In half it goes, only to reveal a safe behind it.

Strix claps her hands again to get Deadpool's attention, and points at the safe.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"That's my girl! Oh if only you had a few more years on you," Wade sighs out melodramatically, unaware how true that really was before he fairly skips over to the safe and takes a look at it up close. An arm goes around Mary's shoulder and he draws her in tight to examine as he points a finger at the safe.

"Now see, this here, if one of us were Catwoman we'd very carefully and delicately crack this baby and wouldn't leave a trace behind," Wade finishing this part by rapidly spinning Mary around to look at the destroyed room. "We however are not Catwoman and that ship has sailed so...fire in the hole!" he declares as he gives the girl a rough shove towards an open bathroom door before he slaps a small wad of C4 on the safe's hinges and sets a detonator. He sprints in after her, all but tackling her into the bathtub before the small bomb goes off.

Strix has posed:
Strix all but flails as she finds herself spun around, shoved into the bathroom, and then shove *again* into the tub. She finds Deadpool laying on top of her as it seems like the whole living room explodes. She looks up to him, brown cheeks darkening in a blush, and she quickly looks away and waits for him to get off before carefully climbing out of the bathtub.

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Is that a throwing knife in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Deadpool teases the girl, his moral qualms if they existed in the first place seemingly gone for a moment. Things only getting worse as he does finally start climbing off her and his hands push and squeeze on places they almost certainly do not need to nor should. Heedless of any vengeful stabbings she might give him for his handsiness he walks back out into the destroyed room, the safe door hanging by one hinge a moment before it falls with a clang. Inside was a few stacks of bound bills, a small satchel of coins, and a fancy engraved revolver that he pulls out first, checking it's loaded before giving it a twirl.

"Hey Mary, you ever use one of these before? Come here, creepy old Uncle Deadpool will teach you how!" he offers.

Meanwhile down below a couple of cars full of men are arriving, the one he had let go earlier meeting with them and starting to organize themselves to head back upstairs.

Strix has posed:
There's all sorts of new feelings that come from being felt up by Deadpool. Embarassment, sure. Indignation, of course. But there's a hint of excitement there too that she's never felt before that thrills her. She doesn't get time to process these emotions as Deadpool calls her over to show her the gun.

She takes the gun from him, pops it open to check to see if it's loaded herself, expertly clacks it close and gets into a firing stance that clearly shows that she's been trained how to use a gun.

While it isn't part of a Talon's loadout, they *are* trained to use any weapon at their disposal should it come to it, which does include a variety of guns. She nods to Deadpool, and hands it back to the merc. It just isn't her style.

Wade Wilson has posed:
If Deadpool is even aware of these 'burgeoning' feelings he's awaking in the young ninja he shows no signs of taking it seriously anyway. Or perhaps this is as serious as he gets "Guns, swords, but totally silent. We've got almost a Ying Yang thing going on here, like two sides of the same coin. Oh Mary we need to go and..."

Whatever suggestion Wade was about to make is for better or worse stopped by an armed goon appearing in the open doorway. "ALRIGHT GET YOUR ASSES-" is as far as he gets before the heavy sack of coins also in the safe catches him square in the face and he goes with a clatter of change.

"We were having a MOMENT!" Wade cries out before more goons start swarming in through the door and a new more intense round of gunfire erupts. "I need a cowboy hat to go with the revolver! How are we supposed to do cowboys, ninjas and mobsters if you...dammit!" even Deadpool having to shut up and take cover as the volley of gunfire starts to tear a few too many holes in him that keeping upright was going to be challenging soon, diving back into the bathroom to recuperate and 'strategize.'

Strix has posed:
Strix isn't one to run from a fight, but a horde of angry mobsters might be enough to slow down even the most talented of assassins like herself. She heads to the bathroom, taking a detour through the kitchen to grab her hood, which she's already pulling on by the time she gets there. Sure she might take a bullet or two, but with her healing factor that really doesn't slow her down any.

Once in the bathroom she turns to Deadpool and gives him a quizzical tilt of the head. What now?

Wade Wilson has posed:
Shotgun blasts, automatic fire, handguns, they had quite the mix as the 9 armed goons focus fire on the bathroom, the edges of the door tearing apart and bullets spraying through the walls at random. Deadpool seems rather nonplussed as he takes a moment to let some of his bullet wounds stitch up and looks over the fancy engraved revolver before casting an eye about the bathroom.

"Right. Well we could just run out there and charge them head on. Or..."

"Larry go check it out!"

"You check it out!"

"Guys look I'm telling you, we shot the dude full of holes before and he just, well look you can see them dead over there!"

"Alright alright, we'll go in a pair, the rest of you..." And then a new round of madness starts. With the wall and door frame weakened the heavy cast iron tub has little trouble smashing through, Deadpool having flipped it upside down and set it over both himself and Mary. The pair of them run out into the room blindly with a crash of wood.

"What the fu-" says the nearest mobster who gets clipped by the tub with its two sets of legs as it goes dashing a few feet further, gunfire already ricocheting off its metal surface.

"NOW!" hollers Deadpool as he and Mary both toss the heavy tub forward which smashes into two more thugs, the tiny apartment offering little elsewhere such a crowd to go. Three of the nine at least momentarily down, and now Deadpool and Mary were right in the middle of them. Up close was not where you wanted to be with these two, distance almost always a better option. Deadpool just lets out a 'WEEEEE!' sound as he leaps towards the nearest one and draws a katana with his right hand, the revolver in his left firing at another.

Strix has posed:
The mobsters just don't stand a chance. On their own, Deadpool and Strix are some of the deadliest assassins on earth. Together? No chance. Strix is a whirl of blades and throwing knives, deftly dodging as many bullets as she can (which is a considerable amount) as she mows through the goons with almost inhuman speed and alacrity.

Together they make short work of the nine men, and when the dust settles, the only two standing are the pair of assassins. Strix looks at the carnage around them with the satisfaction of a job well done. Once they get a chance to catch their breathes, Strix pulls out her notepad, and looking at it dejectedly as there's a bullet hole gone right through it. Still she takes out her pen and writes a message around the hole.

THANK
  O
YOU

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Aww, you are most welcome my bloody moist Owlette. You get away from this Court business you come see me. You get about 5 years older and you come see me wearing something nice," Deadpool lewdly suggests even as he stabs his sword unecessarily in and out of a man's back several more times with a wet 'schlick' sound seemingly just for kicks. Finally though he wipes it off on the apartment's window curtains and sheathes it, grabbing cash from the safe, pocketing most of it for himself but tossing one bundle to Mary. "There we go, 5 for me and 1 for you. Sorry kiddo, gender inequality in the workplace is a real bitch. Best of luck and if you need me to go help blow up some of these ninja pals of yours give me a ring. Or, you know, call BATMAN I suppose," he adds with a bit of a jealous tone as he heads for out the door.