5227/Attack on Ant-Girl

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Attack on Ant-Girl
Date of Scene: 17 February 2021
Location: Main Room - Titan's Tower
Synopsis: The Titans show Ant-Girl that size isn't everything.
Cast of Characters: Nadia Pym-van Dyne, Bart Allen, Victor Stone, Terry O'Neil, Vivian Vision, Gar Logan

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
It is a lovely day at Titans Tower. Save for the ongoing doppleganger threat, the weather is nice, there is fresh coffee in the coffee pot and nothing is exploding.

Into the Tower common room on this peaceful wonderful day when it seems like nothing could go wrong steps Nadia dressed in her Waspette armor. She seems a touch less focused than usual, just sort of wandering around looking at things.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen has decided to check in with the Titans today. He has been doing a check in with folks he knows lately perhaps a bit more than often than normal after the incident with Phoebe. So today he comes in and actually has brought something. He is carrying a stack of boxes, and moves to set them on a table. Pecan pie, cakes and other things he stopped and grabbed at a bake sell in the south.

Victor Stone has posed:
What else would be happening on this perfect day at Titans Tower, but a pizza party? Vic sets the pies down on the counter, popping each box open in succession: veggie lover's, meat lover's, extra extra cheese, tofu mustard sardine, pepperoni, Hawaiian. Sodas are retrieved from the fridge in no time, plus plates from the cabinets, and soon everyone is invited by the floating scents to partake.

Vic himself grabs four slices, each from a different box, and piles them on a plate before taking a seat at the head of the table. "Come and get it!" he hollers. "Nadia, Bart, grab yourselves plates."

Terry O'Neil has posed:
There is a dash of winter and a few snowflakes that erupt into the room when Vorpal steps through a Rabbit Hole. "... it's snowing in Ontario, just FYI!" he calls out as the hole closes up behind him. The feline shudders and shakes off some flakes off his fur and uniform before his eyes widen a bit, the scent of the feast reaching him. "I seem to have arrived at just the right time," the Cheshire cat says, making a beeline for the food, "Vic you are an angel of mercy, I haven't eaten since last night! Let me grab something before my green menace arrives and eats all of it!" he jokes, set to grab a few slices.

"Oh hey, Nadia, Bart! Food!" he says, pointing to the repast and stating the absolutely glaringly obvious.

Vivian Vision has posed:
It's not exactly uncommon for Vivian Vision to stop by at Titans Tower. With the doppelganger threat it's been all hands on deck. She can always do her schoolwork on the go and her work at GIRL can often be done remotely too. It's simply a matter of a quick flight and a hyperloop trip after school is done.

She also doesn't need to eat or sleep. Which helps a lot with scheduling /and/ makes her a cheap dinner guest!

"Good day Great Aunt Nadia. It's good to see you taking a break from your work," she greets cheerfully. "Would you like me to prepare some coffee for you?"

Gar Logan has posed:
"Is that pies and..pies I smell?" Gar's voice can be heard as he enters the room, clad in his costume. It's the one Vorpal had made for him, so it's got his influence all over it in the way it fits. "Special occasion, or just 'Dinner and dessert at the Tower?'" A general greeting is made to those who have found their way here already, consisting of a casual, "Yo, dudes. And wait a minute before all this stuff disappears. I gots ta document it for posterior..I mean, posterity."

Out comes the smartphone for picture-taking. Ever since the dupes of Gar and Terry were dealt with, things have picked up in Beast Boy's life. He's been happier again, if still wary of threats around.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
"Oh wow, pie and pizza! Score!" Nadia grins from ear to ear and begins making her way towards the stacks of food that have been brought. She does pause for a moment to just sort of stare at Cyborg's cyborgness before she catches herself. And then Vorpal rabbit holes into the room, she turns and grins at the familiar sight, "Well hello, again." Did they see each other earlier? Was that a wink? Maybe she's just being weird.

Vivian too earns the briefest of curious looks when she addresses her as 'Great Aunt' before she nods her head, "Yes, please!" She says cheerfully. The entering green young man also gets a wave as she scoops up a double slice of meat lovers inverts them towards each other like a pizza sandwich and begins scarfing them down.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will look over to Victor "Thanks, and make sure you get yourself some of the pies and cakes, there was a bake sell, where I went to middle school, so I decided to help them out." He offers with a smile "Miss Copples's pineapple cake is the bomb." He offers and does get a plate, and starts off with a piece of pizza from each box, trying to make sure to leave others with some.

Victor Stone has posed:
Vic has already kicked back at the table, and has a wedge of pizza in his mouth when he notices Nadia staring at him. He peers at her for a second, then holds up a palm and waves it across her line of sight a few times. "Earth to Nadia," he says, puzzled. "I've already told you, if you want to work on the borg bits, just ask and I'll drop some I'm not using off in the lab. It weirds me out when you eyeball me like that weird space raccoon." Affecting a tearful, dramatic voice and slapping a palm to his chest with a muffled clank, he adds, "I'm not just a piece of not-meat!"

Finally, he flashes Bart a thumbs-up, and says in his normal voice, "Oh, I'll get to it. Maybe not as fast as you do, but I'll get to it."

Vivian Vision has posed:
Vivian Vision tilts her head slighty at the greeting or lack of, then shrugs. Who knows how many hours her Great Aunt has been working. Probably too many! Either way it's futile trying to coax her into stopping and at least she's taking a break to go get food. Probably a long due one at that.

"Does anyone else want a hot drink while I am making them?" she wonders, already starting to work on what would be the typical coffee order for Nadia. At least the version she expects. "Alternatively I am happy to fetch cold drinks while the coffee is brewing."

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"Gods, go easy on me- some of us don't have the benefit of super-accelerated metabolisms or the ability to burn off energy by changing shape." Eyeing Bart's goodies, the Cheshire adds "If I touch any of those, I'll have to parkour to Gotham and back just to burn that off. I think I'll stick with the two pizza slices for now..."

He looks puzzled at Nadia's wink, but it's not /that/ strange. There's the possibility that someone showed her a rerun of Happy Days and now she assumes Fonzie is the standard for teenage social interactions. Nobody back then seems to have wondered why the teenager looked like he was in his late twenties. "Viv, if you could fetch me a hot cocoa, I will be indebted to you for the rest of my natural life. Or til breakfast."

Passing Gar, he smirks and adds, "There's been too much posterior documenting already, Logan. Stop taking food pics to post on instagram and get to eating. Weird Al says it's tacky!" There's a playful mussing of Gar's hair, "Oh, Vic? Remember my friend from Giorgio's who made you that T-shirt? She's got another one for you. You just gotta drop by there on a Saturday when she's on shift."

Gar Logan has posed:
Changing shape is one of the reasons Gar can eat so much. He also..just loves food, okay? Don't judge him!

"Look at all this stuff. I'll have one of this, and this, and that, and.." he says, trailing off as he loads up some slices like he's trying to build..well, he says it. "Dudes, I gotta be careful before this turns into the Leaning Tower of Pizza!"

Eyeing Vorpal, he points out, "I've met Weird Al, and I could again. He's one of my bros. I feel like we get each other." The state of his hair is an improvement after the cat is done with it. For the moment, he misses whatever's going on with Vic and Nadia, though he adds to the latter, "Gaming sesh later on?" Hot drinks are passed up.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
"You're, just so beautiful Vic, I can't help it!" Did Nadia learn sarcasm? Then again knowing her she might be serious. The Waspette dressed young woman reaches for some pie. "Oooh pecan pie! I haven't had pecan pie in ages!"

She swallows a mouthful of pecan pie and grins at Gar, "Oh, I love games! Yes! We should definitely play some games!" She seems... quite excited by this prospect.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will move to have a seat and says "What games you playing Nukofighter 15? Heroteam Tycoon? Satarish 3?" He asks naming some of the popular or maybe less popular video games. He will zoom out and pop back with a six pack of sodas with a red label of Cheerwine on them "Thanks Viv, I got some for me."

Victor Stone has posed:
"Thanks, Viv, but I'm good," Vic says in answer to the drink offer. He got his own soda while he was setting out the food, and he points to where it has been sitting in a shoulder-mounted cupholder ever since. There's a little bit of mist coming off it; he has an internal cooling system anyway, so why not put it to good use?

Vorpal's T-shirt brings a disappointed look to his face. "Oh, man, if I'd known, I would have asked after her!" he says. Honestly, where they even get T-shirts in his size, he has long since decided not to ask. It's likely a custom order they couldn't afford if not for his patronage, that much is clear.

Gar gets a quick series of nods, then: "I guess if you're all healed up, it's fine. I wouldn't want to injure you all over again."

Finally, Nadia is getting a very odd look. An enthusiastic rant about his technical specs, sure. Probing queries about new upgrades and forthcoming designs, all the time. But it's pretty unusual for Waspette to come at him with something as relatively mundane as 'beautiful.' Still, he thinks there's a pretty good way to check in with Nadia, so he sets down his slice, rises to his feet, and stomps over toward her to lift her up in a big old robot bear hug.

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"Weird Al? Well, aren't you the fancy shmancy, Gar. And you haven't even gotten me an autograph from him!" his green eyes glance over at Gar, and he teases, "And on this day, on top of everything! Oh, Bart-"

The cat heads over to the speedster, prepping his pizza slice, "There was something you mentioned the other day that I didn't get to ask you about. You said something about Gar and I having c-"

And then Vorpal freezes for a moment, the pizza slice part way to his mouth. His head turns to glance at Nadia and, with a slight frown, he says "... sorry, Nadia, what was that?"

Gar Logan has posed:
Gar Logan rolls his eyes at Vic. "Man, I'm better than ever. The only one who's gonna be bringing the pain is me."

Ever so helpful, he informs Vorpal haughtily, "You never asked. Kian's the mind-reader, not me. But I'm sure I can get you, like, a signed napkin. Or, a used pink bathrobe, a rare mint snowglobe, a Smurf TV tray.." Fortunately he doesn't sing it.

Part of that is because after he answers Bart and says, "All that and more," to his gaming mentions, he squints at the speedster and Cheshire as Terry cuts off.

Looking between the rest of them, he centers more on someone else. Then, he pops the question. No, not to Vorpal, but to Nadia. And no, not /that/ question. "Uh, what kind of games?"

Vivian Vision has posed:
"One hot cocoa coming up," Vivian says solemnly as she moves around in the kitchen. Her synthezoid memory allowing her to recall just precisely where everything is kept and, if it's something Terry drinks often, the way he prefers his drink made. "Although I will not require payment as I am not using my own cocoa. Nor do I really have a need for compensation." A shrug. "Financial or otherwise."

Water alas takes it's time to boil. It probably would have been quicker to ask Bart to fetch preboiled water but that does seem rather rude...

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
Nadia looks curiously at Bart when he begins listing off video games, maybe she was thinking about board games or... She looks at Terry and Gar with a big grin, "I said I love games!" She gives Terry a grin he has seen before that slightly mad and not in a good way expression he saw on Ant-Girl right before things spiraled out of control that night in the alley.

"Oh you know, the classics." She tells Gar, "Races, tag, dodge the boot, mazes, fantastic voyage, gladitorial.." It seems like the list might have continued but a very large cyborg is very rapidly approaching and she is being pulled into a robot bear hug.

And that is where things are really laid bare because rather than enthusiastically returning the hug, the young woman that looks like Nadia mildly panics and does her disappearing trick, shrinking out of Victor's grasp.

Moments later she reappears a couple meters away holding what looks like a strange oversized Pym capsule in her hands, with a digital display showing the letters <<A R M E D>>. In an instant the room is filled with a blinding flash of light.

"Let's play!" The doppleganger's voice rings out almost like a clap of thunder and when vision clears, suddenly the world is a whole lot bigger.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen blinks a bit and looks around the room "Oh a rat s level." He looks around the room, and says "Whats the object of the game?" He starts to run around looking to see whats what going under the couch and coming out the other side, couching and covered by dust and fuzz. "Avoid under there... the dust bunnies are huge." But he is smiling still

Victor Stone has posed:
By the time Cyborg's hugging arms clang against his own sides, he's already sure that something is very, very wrong. But when he realizes that everything is also very, very /big/, there's one obvious conclusion he reaches almost immediately:


An obvious conclusion, and a squeaky-voiced one, to boot, but not a particularly germane one. He jets into the air on tiny rocket shoes, scanning for evil Nadia and his allies, trying to get a lay of the land.

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"Oh god damn it!" Vorpal shouts into the comm, "Doppelganger! I've met this crazy crow before!"

He's been through this before, alright, so he is in Deja Vu land. That creeping edge of suspicion gave him advance warning, but it was still too late. "Bart- this isn't Nadia, it's her secondhand psycho double. You're the only one whose powerset is of any use right now-" and then he cuts off.

"She probably has access to our comm system if she got into Nadia's stuff. Try to maintain radio silence."

Because she'd be able to listen in on their frequency, and thus be able to catch on to what they were doing. He doesn't know if Vic is capable of cutting Nadia out of the comm loop from his current state, but he hopes that gives the chrome Titan the idea to try. He has his Rabbit Hole, but using it right now would mean drawing attention... and Harley Quinn's Manual For The Pugnacious Pugilist, Dastardly Daredevil, High-Fallutin' Hero and Bruisin' Brawler indicates that one shouldn't deliver a direct hit unless there is some mis-direction to muss up the direction in which the target was directin' in, indirectly. Of course, he still has accesss to Nadia's Christmas Present- something he should be able to activate even in this tiny state by the use of Rabbit Holes and his ability to manipulate objects with his magic... but setting off an EMP here would be absolutely disastrous- because it could screw with DoppelNadia's suit, but it could also do some nasty shit to Vic, and he was not going to be responsible for BSOD's one of his friends. So, /different/ distraction needed.

That is why the Tiny Vorpal becomes invisible, and suddenly across the room there is a tiny figure that suddenly enlarges herself out of nothingness.

Nadia Pym Van Dyne, in her Waspette suit, facing her Doppelganger from across the room.

"Really?" comes the Waspette's voice, arms crossing over her chest.

Distraction deployed. Now it was time to see how the rest of the team team-worked.

Vivian Vision has posed:
Alas it looks like no-one is getting a hot cocoa or coffee any time soon.

The sole mercy of Viv being the only one over in the kitchen is that no-one is likely to see just how upset she is by the competing notions that go through her head after Doppel-Nadia drops her Pym bomb. Assuming this is a doppelganger she can't help but wonder if her Great Aunt is dead? Captive? Before less likely scenarios present. Perhaps she just performed an experiment to 'fix' herself that went wrong! Or opened a dimensional portal and had her mind eaten.

The list of not entirely implausable horrors is rather longer than Viv would like...

Once the initial shock has worn off, taking a good whole second to panic, she cranks her communications gear up to maximum power and sends out a combined warning & distress signal. Even at this size her communications gear should be able to reach the Tower network. Unless Evil Nadia has set up jammers or tampered with the building network. Still it never hurts to try!

More practically speaking she slips out of phase with her surroundings and holographically cloaks herself too for good measure.

Gar Logan has posed:

Bright flash. Bigger room..except for Nadia or Waspette or whatever. Crud.

"Memo to self. Self: do not set it up on a tee like that next time." And there will be a next time, because Gar will be damned if he's going to get past his own dupe and Terry's and fall to..this.

No matter what their sizes are, they're further apart, relatively speaking, to where they'd been before. Facing a giant in a giant room like this? Surely there's a game or movie or something he can call back to for help. Over the comms he does say, "Honey! DoppelNadia shrunk the Titans!" They can hear in the room and over the comms as he yells, "I bet you feel like a big girl now, don't you? Well, I got news for you. We're still gonna kick your sorry butt and send you back home, so get ready!"

Where he's gone, it's hard to tell. He's turned into something even smaller, relatively speaking. Even if he went dragon-sized, he still might only be able to get large enough to fit in the palm of Nadia's hand. From some other part of the room he taunts, "Frankie Valli sang that big girls /do/ cry!" But how is he going to deal with her? How will any of them?

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
In the middle of the room towers 'definitely not Nadia', now not even trying to keep up the act. Not that her act was that great to begin with since she never had the same spy training as this world's Nadia. "First game! Hide and go seek! I love this game. Hmmmm now where could my new toys have gotten off to?!" A brief burst of dust near the couch has her skipping across the room and getting down on her hands and knees to peer underneath. As a result the flying Cyborg goes unnoticed for the moment.

When she hears her own voice though her head perks up from her under counch investigation looking at the other Nadia across the room. "Oh it's you! The not me! I've been wanting to meet you, ever since I heard you became an icky Wasp, not like Mom or Dad, was The Queen's legacy not good enough for you?!" Her tone is manic and a bit crazed, without batting an eyelash she raises one of the Waspette suit's arm gauntlets pointing it at the other her and fires a high powered energy blast straight at center mass. To the miniaturized Titans it might as well be a starship cannon.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will see that the Badia is down closer to his level, and when she looks up, he runs towards her, and straight up her arm. He looks for wires he can pull, screws he can un screw buttons he can push. and if he finds any of those he does just that. He will make his way up her arm and starts running around her neck, up around her ears, and not finding what he is looing for he punches her ear lobes a few dozen times each before running around and over her back.

Victor Stone has posed:
Unfortunately, Vorpal's distraction is just too effective: Vic is way too distracted by real!Nadia's sudden appearance to pick up on the hint about their comm frequency. What he /does/ think of, seeing reinforcements arriving, is that he ought to be able to bring in reinforcements of his own.

Vic has a lot of projects going in the tower at any time, but it's now the moment to bring one of his longest-running, most well known, and most generally pointless to bear on this problem. He fires off a transmission into the tower network, and within seconds, all of the tiny Titans are going to hear a mechanized whir and outsize rumble from all around them. The reason won't take too long to become apparent, even with their eyelines this close to the ground: from all directions, along walls, floors, and ceilings, the hundreds of oversized pucks in Cyborg's Roomba Army converge on the interloper. They have no guns to blaze, no horns to sound, but the rotund Rohirrim arise nonetheless.

Tiny Cyborg dives onto one near the front of the pack, yells, "YEEEEEEE HAWWWWWWWWW!!!" in his tiny helium voice, and is brought at a relatively breakneck page inch by trundling inch closer to evil Nadia. The other tiny Titans will find the building-sized metal creatures perfectly docile and, thanks to cool details on all of their casings, easy to climb and ride.

Gar Logan has posed:
Bart's got the right idea, even if it's a struggle to actually see him. Gar has turned into an even tinier bird than normal, all the better to get closer to Nadia with, especially as she fires off a /big/ blast at the illusion of herself. Depending on how the reaction to that and Bart's attempts to bother her, Gar flies around very close and drops down past her.

In the process, he turns into the biggest skunk he can manage, which is not all that large, and in his best Bugs Bunny voice he taunts, "Ain't I a stinker?"

*PAF* in her dumb face! It's like nasty perfume.

Back to a bird he goes, lest she get the chance to catch and eat him or something. "Dude..is that a Roomba army? Hell yeah! Go!" Pause. "Keep going!" Pause. "Any day now!"

Terry O'Neil has posed:
And Vorpal grins. This is what he was hoping for! As the blast leaves DoppelNadia's cannon, a Rabbit Hole opens in front of the illusory Waspette to intercept.

And its sister hole appears right behind the imposter! Vorpal is obviously trying to do one of his trademark 'stop hitting yourself!' ripostes. However, due to the very /weird/ angle that he is at, the blast misses Hope, flying over her shoulder and impacting the ceiling.

"Well, fuck!"

It's not easy, being smol. But Vorpal is not done tormenting this doppelganger. He needs to buy his friends some time- and distract Badia so that Victor's Roomba Rumble is successful.

An unusual sight suddenly manifests out of nowhere. Imagine, if you will, a six foot tall man, gangly and awkward, with long black hair falling in greasy waves that frame an unsettlingly elongated face offset by the shocking discordance of features like an aquiline nose, Bette Davis eyes and a mouth the likes of which Vivian Gish might have killed for. The lanky figure, clad in tweed and paisleys like a college professor who woke up late and had to dress hurriedly in the dark, is also carrying a ukelele.

And now there are at least /ten/ of these men, surrounding Badia, and the long, elegant hands begin to strum the instruments in unison like fallen angels who had to trade in their harps in their ignominious descent in favor of something more terrifying, a chorus of the Luau of the damned.

And not only is this man and his simulacra strumming the ukelele, but suddenly he bursts out in a chorus of himself, with the highest, most piercing falsetto that a living human has a right to elicit, loudly and aggressively at Nadia, singing:

~It's a world of laughter
A world of tears
It's a world of hopes
And a world of fears
There's so much that we share
That it's time we're aware
It's a small world after all
It's a small world after all
It's a small world after all
It's a small world after all
It's a small, small world~

(EDITOR'S NOTE: The man in question, true believers!: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcSlcNfThUA)

Vivian Vision has posed:
At this size Vivian can't really do a great deal of damage. Not at range anyway. Her eye beams will be stopped by the sheer vast amount of distance they have to cover and even her holographic systems can't really cover all that much of the room.

So after a very brief scan of the roomba army she concludes she has no choice but to fly in closer. Nope. No alternatives at all.

Still her flight speed is at least good enough she can cover the distance in a short-ish space of time. She's not speedster but it sure beats walking all that way from the vast expanse that is the kitchen.

Her distress signal / warning stops now she's on the move. No point giving away her position after all. And if it didn't reach help by now chances are no-one will get there in time.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
It is not entirely that Vorpal's aim was off, there is a sudden jerking of her torso this way and that as her arms flail trying to scratch an itch, "Hey what no! What are you doing?! This isn't part of the game! Bad toy!" DoppleNadia yells as she tries to swat or grab the tiny Bart running around her body, "Ow my ears! Why you little...!"

She is however interrupted as the room begins to fill with Roombas, "What the fuck is this? Cleaning robots? REALLY?! God this is so annoying. UGH! Get over here!" The spoiled brat whines as she begins stomping on roombas.

And then she gets skunked in the face, "Ew gross, why would do that it smells like the bathroom after Hulk on taco night!" Her arms flail trying to swat at the bird as she is swarmed by the Tiny Titans.

Then she just sort of stares at the new set of illusions surrounding her. To her credit she doesn't open fire a second time after almost eating her own blast the last time, that singing though, it's enough to drive anyone mad. "You are the worst toys ever!"

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will start to run up towards her face, but stops "Ewwww." He says at the smell of skunk in the area. so down he goes. He starts looking for pouches or pockets, where she may have hidden the device used to shrink them. He will stand still for a moment giving her a chance to target him, waiting for her to swat or blast him, before moving so she is hitting herself. Seems he learns from others as well. "You gotta ask people to play games, not just try to make them."

Victor Stone has posed:
The Roomba Army is an army of lovers, not of fighters, and what they all love more than anything is spotless, shiny, clean surfaces. Heedless of the danger Badia's stomping feet pose, they continue mobbing toward her, and as they get close enough, they'll deploy the instruments of the janitor's prized and ancient trade.

Azure jets of Windex fly at the interloper from all directions; cleansing foam blasts her and hot wax drips down from above. With a startling shift in paradigm, several of the Roombas pop open side panels to deploy quadcopters and fly directly at her (how did people THINK they cornered from the floor onto the walls?). If they can get purchase, they stick to the Waspette suit with suction cups and magnetic treads, only to scrub at her with rotary buffers and jab at exposed areas with rough, sloppy squeegees. Articulated vacuum hoses deploy, sticking into whatever joints and servos they can reach and sucking, sucking, sucking.

Vic is riding one of the buglike fliers, and he drops like a paratrooper onto Badia's suit, sliding down the outside of that blaster barrel into the inner workings and seeing if he can work a little sabotage magic. A blaster overheat in the middle of battle would be bad for her, now wouldn't it? And if the Pym Particle emitter happens to be in the same general area, so much the better.

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"How appropriate," Vorpal replies to Badia's declaration that they are the worst toys ever, "You fight like a cow!"

This nonsensical non-sequitur perfectly exemplifies the absurdist frame of mind that Vorpal is in right now. He has fully accepted that he is the distraction faction, working overtime to give Badia enough of a sensory overload to not fully see what the rest of his team-mates are up to. The tabernacle of tintinabulating tenorino Tiny Tims suddenly stretches out into infinity, losing definition and becoming strangely monochromatic until they morph into strange, geometric shapes in black and white that surround Nadia.

It is only then that the next phase of the illusion becomes clear. Nadia seems to be suspended in midair, in this illusion, in the dead center of a sphere stretching above and below her. A circular room comprised of M. C. Escher wallpaper, spinning madly, while an eerie and repetitive piano music plays in the background. It is to music what being stuck in traffic for sixty hours is to sanity. It is as if the composer had an almost erotic fixation on the C major key, and had decided to laboriously, tediously stretch out one measure of a C major arpeggio into five minutes of infinitesimal variations.

Yes. It is Phillip Glass.

Vivian Vision has posed:
Vivian isn't exactly operating with a plan co-ordinated with any of the other Titans, but it does rather depend on Badia being very distracted. So all the chaos and confusion work to her advantage.

A portion of Viv re-runs frame by frame through everything Doppel-Nadia has said and done. Her confusion at seeing her would imply there are no synthezoids on that world. So hopefully she is totally unprepared for a direct phasing attack.

All she has to do is cover the remaining distance from the kitchen to the dining area, avoiding any stray attacks that might disable her, and then it's just the simple matter of unphasing just enough to block a vital vein or artery long enough to cause Badia to black out /without/ killing her. Ideally any of the other Titans get seriously hurt. What could possibly go wrong?

Gar Logan has posed:
Having done something here, Beast Boy eases away from being too close to the action, lest he get caught by a fist or knocked into by something else. Nadia is still large, if not so much in charge.

Vorpal's illusions are even starting to make him feel weirded out in ways he wasn't prepared for. Tiny Tim was one thing. This? He has to look away for a moment from where he's landed on the countertop over by the kitchen.

It would appear some of the others have a good track on hopefully getting things put to rights again, and Vic's efforts look like they're making progress. After Gar's returned to normal, he watches the Roombas go into aggressive cleaning mode and says under his breath, "Dude, I have to try that sometime." Good thing he's tiny and his voice won't carry much.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
The Pym Bomb seems to be gone, likely consumed by the initial detonation but what Bart does find searching through the pockets of the Waspette suit are any number of explosives, sticky bombs, and EMP grenades. "Fuck!" Badia screams as she tries to swat Bart only to hit herself. While she is a skilled combatant, Red Room she is not.

The continued assault of the Roomba army only leads to more, well as much as she can curse before she takes some windex and floor wax to the face. "Enough!" She finally yells retreating from both the impromptu human carwash and mind bending illusions, seeming to vanish. The 'ground' suddenly disappearing from under Bart as she does. Inside the suit's gauntlet however cyborg goes along for the ride getting really really smol for a moment before she resizes again and he returns to just smol. There are so harrowing flight acrobatics in there too however and it is far from a pleasant experience.

"Okay, no more games." Badia declares when she reappears again, still dripping with various cleaning agents, in her hands are the cluster bombs Nadia has used to devastating effect on so many missions. "If you can't play games like good toys, then I guess it's time you went to the scrap heap!."

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will blink and start to fall. He wishes he had one of the yipes signs, but alast he does not. He starts to swirl his hands in circles, trying to at least make a bit of an air cousin to slow himself down. Not something he is used to though, he does wobble, and drops a few relative feet at a time, not slowing the way he had hoped.

Victor Stone has posed:
Sickened badly by the way he's being thrown around, Vic only barely manages to hold down his pizza. Thank God it's just plain old meat lover's; he doesn't want to think about what might have happened if he'd enjoyed(?) a Starfire special before going on that gut-churning thrill ride.

But despite the distractions of the unpredictable resizing and flipping around, he clings to the innards of the gauntlet systems. The blaster's system is simple enough: battery, discharge device, focusing emitter. Rerouting power based on his knowledge of such technology is child's play. Less so when he's sick to his stomach, but still: reapplying and looping a few conduits, he sets it up so that the blaster's next shot will melt down the most sensitive parts of the device, rendering it useless.

Then, he monkey-bars through the wires down to the shrinker device. Physically grabbing what he's pretty sure is the triggering mechanism, he sights along the beam emitter. He won't be able to do much but trigger a blast, but if Badia aims at any of his friends, he'll be ready and waiting to re-embiggen them to full combat status.

Terry O'Neil has posed:
The sight of those cluster bombs is not a good one. Vorpal growls and quickly Rabbit Holes himself to another part of the room- to the area that has the rug. That plushy, comfy one everybody goes 'ooooh!' at because it's so fluffy. "I can show you the world," he says, reaching down and touching a glowing hand to the carpet, "Shining, shimmering, splendid
Tell me, Pymcess, now when did
You last let your heart decide?"

The spread of chaos magic covers the rug in a heartbeat, and that fluffy, expensive rug takes to the air like the flying carpet of fable. It will try to wrap itself around Badia's head, to reduce her accuracy of those cluster bombs, since it might carry the chance of blowing herself up... but she might do it anyway just out of spite.

Also potentially blowing up the tiny Vorpal who is clinging to the carpet for dear life.

"I may not have thought this through."

Vivian Vision has posed:
The problem with Vivians phasing plan? Badia doesn't seem intent on standing still and just letting herself be attack. It's really rather inconsiderate when you think about it. Of course now she's flying around in the 'sky' she can at least contribute to the ongoing struggle with some light laser eye beams.

The tiny synthezoid stealth fighter using all the confusion generated by Terry and his magic as cover. Her energy attacks do after all cause injury, however minor, which might draw reprisals if she was detected.

With the cluster bombs inbound Viv puts on as much speed as she can. Urgency meaning her plan is now less about subtle unphasing to induce fainting and more about a high speed phasing right through Badia's head. Unphasing just enough to cause unbearable, collapse on the floor throwing up in agony, levels of pain.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
Like shooting fish in a barrel, or falling Barts in a tower. Badia brings her gauntlet up, still unaware of her gauntlet's tiny passenger, and aims it at Bart with the intent of taking out the troublesome speedster while he is completely unable to dodge. Tactically it is one of those opportunities just too good to pass up.

It is also too good to be true. As the blaster activates, Cyborg has just enough time to activate the size manipulation beam and get the hell out of dodge before the gauntlet overheats and explodes. Meanwhile a very different beam is fired at Bart, impacting him in mid-air and restoring him to his former size, more or less, give or take a couple inches.

And that's when she is assaulted by a carpet denying her the ability to see. Sticky cluster bombs are cast wildly about the room as Badia is once again flailing under a combined and coordinated assault. Explosions rock the room in all directions. One bomb in particular lands in the pizza and pie and moments later the explosion covers the area in what looks like the remains of a truly terrible food fight.

Gar Logan has posed:
"Yeah! Get her! Show her!" Gar cheerleads from relative safety, but only until a cluster bomb is flying his way. "Incoming!"

He really doesn't want to be caught out in the open when that thing goes off, even if it might not be lethal. For a Tiny Titan such as he, it's a huge bomb! Taking flight again, he gets beneath the level of the counter just before the bomb does what bombs do. That was close!

And then he's buried, stuck to the floor in a pile of warm cheese. The only thing he can do is start eating his way out. That's a lot of cheese.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen ahhs, and as he grows he thuds into the floor, his minivortexes may cause a bit of havoc for others, but only briefly. He will be up, and moving over to Badia. He may not be Tony Stark, Hank Pym or one of the other big brains, but he is decently smart and has knowledge of future tech. He will start to take Badia's armor off, and removing any weapons he can at super speed, trying to leave her in what ever body suit or what not she wears under the armor.

Victor Stone has posed:
As Vic plunges out of Badia's gauntlet, he tucks and then untucks into a full-on swan dive. Explosions of a massive size go off all around him, buffeting his tiny form during its plunge. Dozens of Roombas fragment into shards. It's graceful, if at a tiny scale: an onlooker could almost imagine that they hear the Ride of the Valkyries playing in the background.

Wait, no: that's /actually/ the Ride of the Valkyries playing, over speakers built into Vic's armored body. He turned on his own soundtrack in order to swan dive through a cluster bomb. What a ham.

But his jet boots fire up as he nears the ground, and he swoops away, just in time to land astride a fleeing, flying roomba, fist upraised like a warrior of old. "ARISE, ARISE! FIRE AND SLAUGHTER! FOR THE PIZZA!" he squeaks in his teeny tiny Titan voice.

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"Ahahaha you didn't expect THAT, you ratched-"

Alas, we will never know what Vorpal would have said next, as a giant glob of cheese and pepperoni impacts him and he is temporarily immobilized and silenced.


Vivian Vision has posed:
Ahhh phasing. It's perhaps Vivian's best defensive ability. All those cluster bomb explosions and all the gross exploded food pass through her without leaving so much as a scratch. And finally she'll be using it offensively, despite all the risks involved, as even the slighest pause could allow Badia chance to flee into the Microverse or worse. To send them all there with no way of returning home or simply releasing uncontained Pym Particles in an implosion that'll wipe the Tower off the face of the Earth.

If her dive bomb attack strikes true it'll mean she passes clear through Badia's brain. Disrupting electrons as she goes. A temporary scrambling of her brain functions and a sensation like her mind is on fire.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
Badia is wrapped in a carpet, stripped of her armor, and finally in comes the roomba cavalry. She has likely never had such a terrible day in her life. And then her electrons get disrupted on top of that. Another round of hot floor wax to the eyes and she is reeling backwards, one foot stepping on one of the roombas that quickly scoots forward taking her foot out from under her. If she wasn't wrapped in a carpet she might have been able to use her wings, but she is and can't.

Down she goes, smacking her head on the common room floor with a thud that could very well give someone a concussion. It would seem not having been through the Red Room she also isn't enhanced by super soldier serum like the real Nadia and is out like a light.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will check on Badia once, he knows she is out for sure, he will move to put all her armor pieces on a nearby table. He looks around the room, trying to find any of the small titans "Anyone know how this works, or do I need to call the Avengers or the Atom?"

Victor Stone has posed:
"GET THE STASIS MODULE FROM MY ROOM, BART," Helium Vic chitters from astride his humming quadcopter Roombasus. He's already buzzing toward the prone Doppelganger's neatly stacked armor, and her handy little stolen gauntlet. "IT'S TOO BIG FOR ME TO CARRY. THEN SOMEONE ELSE STAND IN FRONT OF THE GAUNTLET SO I CAN ZAP YOU BACK TO NORMAL SIZE." In a somehow even tinier voice, he appends, "her wrist is also too big for me to aim with"

Terry O'Neil has posed:
Vorpal finally extricates himself from the sea of mozarella and pepperoni, just in time for Badia to be goin' down, she's yelling Timber! There are giants in the sky!

After getting shaken and rattled from the impact, he slowly pries himself from the rug and, seeing that Badia is not moving, he raises his arms in victory and belts out:
~There are big, tall, terrible giants in the sky!~

Because something this ridiculous is never complete without a Stephen Sondheim reference. "Good job, Team! That was some fine teamwork considering we couldn't use our comms. Well-oiled machinery, we are," he glances down. "... with... pepperoni grease. Ungh. I'm going to have to shower for four hours to get this out of my fur..."

Vivian Vision has posed:
Vivian Vision unphases and disables her stealth hologram. Hoving in the air over Badia to make sure she doesn't try anything. Or that Bart doesn't take the removal of armour and equipment too far. She might be an evil doppelganger but that's still her Great Aunt.

"I have recordings of all the times Great Aunt Nadia used her gauntlets while I was around. Plus direct contact details for Wasp and Doctor Pym." This is rather different to knowing what makes them work. But is at least data that'll prove useful in figuring out how to unshrink them. Probably. Who can say if Badia had made her own modifications or rigged any self destruct systems.

More importantly now that the comms are fairly safe to use again she fires off a dozen urgent messages to GIRL and all her Great Aunts various contact details at her assorted labs and various houses. Poor real Nadia will have to spend some cleaning out all the 'Please don't be dead' emails her inboxes..

All the while she remains utterly untouched by the mess. It's almost tragically unfair.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
"Ummm, did I miss something?" Comes a familar voice from the elevator doors. Standing there is this dimension's Nadia, dressed in her street clothes and and looking very confused at the mess, "Oh hi Bart! What happened to the common area? Did Vic and Gar have a fight over toppings that escalated into a full pizza war?"

Then her eyes fall on her fallen double, "Oh no, oh no no no, that's her isn't it. What happened?!"

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen will zoom off to get the device Vic asked for coming back with five or six different things hoping he has the right thing and nothing to embarressing. He looks over to Nadia "She was pretending to be you, and she was ok, wanted to play a game, shrunk us all down, but then started calling us toys and such. If she had just asked to play games and acted asked for friends in stead of toys, she might have been ok."

Gar Logan has posed:
Gar Logan is still working his way through all that cheese. "Oh man, I'm gonna be sooo fat after this. No, wait. I'll just burn it off like I always do." Om nom nom. Somewhere on the other side of the kitchen area, the evil Nadia is being taken care of the rest of the way, but he can't see it from his perspective. Finally, his head pokes out from some of that cheese, and he pats his stomach before climbing out with an exaggerated waddle. With any luck, that won't make it on the security feed.

"Is it done? Did someone figure out how to make us big again?" he calls out, hoping his voice will carry that far. If it doesn't, he birds his way back to the top of the counter, where the aftermath of the pizzasplosion can be seen.

Victor Stone has posed:
From atop the resting gauntlet, next to his resting Roomba steed, Vic's tiny, squeaky voice hollers, "YES, GAR! STAND IN FRONT OF... /THAT/ BARSTOOL AND I CAN ZAP YOU BACK TO NORMAL." In case it isn't clear which barstool he means -- he is awfully small to be pointing -- a beam blasts from the tabletop, and now one of the barstools is the size of a Volkswagen. "SEE?"

Terry O'Neil has posed:
"I'll wait my turn," Vorpal calls out. "I'm hungry and this pepperoni is the size of a pizza so... take your time. Everybody else first." Hey- he has the thrifty instincts of a college student.

Nadia Pym-van Dyne has posed:
Nadia blinks a few more times surveying the scene of resizing barstools and shrunk pizza antics as she really starts to take in the state of the room. She then turns and nods to Bart, "You know what, I think you guys have got this. Be careful though, if she's like me she doesn't need her armor to be dangerous." And with that she just turns and leaves back the way she came.

Bart Allen has posed:
Bart Allen blinks standing there holding the cyber gadgets, and watches Nadia go. He will set the gadgets away from Badia, and moves to start cleaning up, and if he finds teeny tiny titans moves them over gently to where they can get in line for enlargement.

Gar Logan has posed:
"Hey, Nadia!" Gar shouts from the counter, again not sure if his voice is even carrying that far. "Your double is crazy..er! Than you!" Zing!

He finds his way over to that particular stool, waiting. "Okay, time to go big then go..well, right here, now that I think about it." Soon all will be back to what passes as normal, as the doppelganger is finished being dealt with. The Roombas have some extra work ahead of them.