934/Wedding Planners

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Wedding Planners
Date of Scene: 02 April 2020
Location: Stark Tower: Penthouse
Synopsis: Natasha and Tony discuss their fake wedding, and plan a real vacation.
Cast of Characters: Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff




Tony Stark has posed:
A busy day for the Stark campaign. An early morning press junket, followed by a strategy meeting, then Tony had to take the armor for some barnstorming down in Georgia. Here, there, and everywhere with Natalie Rushman-Stark at his side. That's the way SHIELD wants it, and truth be told Tony enjoys it. Sure, he puts on the face of it being an unbearable cover but in the few moments they have together he's always keen to tell her that spending time with her is one of the best things about the whole damn campaign.

But it's the evening now, and they're back at 'headquarters' in New York. Tony emerges from the shower in his Black Widow t-shirt and sweats, towel draped over his shoulders. The suit has been returned to the Armory vault several dozen floors below, and things actually look like they might be quiet for the moment.

"I was kind of convinced those farm people would hate seeing me in the suit," Tony offers as he moves towards the kitchen, pulling open the fridge and looking inside, "But they seemed kinda jazzed about it, don't you think?"

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Every time Tony tells her that, he gets a similar response. Natalie Stark blushes and smirks and says something to the affect of "Ohhhhh, stop~"
    And then Natasha Romanoff kisses him.
    It's a subtle distinction.
    So is the net benefit of having a beautiful woman at your side when you're running for office, apparently; an unexpected bonus that would likely make SHIELD uncomfortable if they thought it would swing the election. Natasha's situation is complex enough without her thinking TOO much about that right now. November's a long ways off.
    She won the arcane game of rock paper scissors that got her the first use of the shower, and had come out in a robe. Now when Tony returns, she's wearing a sleeveless black shirt and black tights as pants, seeming... remarkably relaxed for a body guard. Helps that you'd have to be out of her paygrade to break in here, one supposes.
    Her legs are crossed at the ankle as she sits on the couch, looking up from her tablet and smiling softly as Tony returns, though her eyes dart to the side thoughtfully as he speaks. "... Me too, actually." She's glad it's not just her. She liked to think she was fairly brushed up on America's kaleidoscope of cultures. "... Maybe it's just a thrill for them. AC/DC doesn't really come out to the Farm Belt."

Tony Stark has posed:
"Maybe," Tony agrees, fetching a nutrient vegetable and fruit juice blend smoothie thing already prepared in a tumbler and holding out another to Nat curiously, "Hopefully they're not expecting Iron Man visits every day if they vote me in. The lawyers were looking at it and they're not even sure I'm even allowed to wear the thing once I'm sworn in."

With or without the smoothie, he makes his way over towards the couch. He pops the cap on his own, drinking down a hearty gulp and sighing contentedly once he's done so. It's then that he leans against the back of the couch, peering over Natasha's shoulder at the tablet. He darts his head to the side, kissing her swiftly on the cheek before trying to grab the computer from her hands.

"What's this? Secret spy business?"

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Natasha purses her lips to the side thoughtfully and hums. "Hmm. I don't know. I'm pretty sure I've seen people get elected on the presumption their administration would consist of N'Sync concerts. Anything's possible." She says, and takes the offered drink with a soft "Ah!", watching Tony wheel around the couch, smiling a bit cheekily when he kisses her... aaaand grimacing as he takes the tablet.
    "Hey!" she complains, and makes a weak grab for it, hampered by the lidded drink in her off hand. "You- Rmm!' She grunts with mock frustration, and then 'falls' onto his lap in the procees of one reaching grab for the tablet, shifting onto her back so that her head rests on one of Tony's thighs. She squints up at him in a mix of faux frustration, and a hint of possibly real disapproval that she's willing to overlook. "You're lucky it's not." she pouts, reaching one hand up to tap Tony's nose with one finger, "You're not too important to try for treason yet."
    Seriously, she could break him in half. Possibly before an emergency suit arrives. It would be like a race!
    She sighs and lets that raised arm fall and drape across her stomach. "No, I um. We promised wedding photos would be forthcoming, so I started looking at..." she sighs. A look at the tablet will reveal a scrolling list of wedding dresses. Surprisingly affordable ones, seemingly in the range of a fiscally responsible spy. "... work clothes." she finishes blandly, closing her eyes.

Tony Stark has posed:
"Ohhh," Tony says quietly, taking the tablet and flicking his finger against the screen to scroll through the dresses, "You know I wouldn't read any of your secret spy stuff, anyway. It's hard enough to stay awake at the SHIELD meetings I'm invited to."

He falls silent for a moment, flicking through the dresses on the screen. It's a telling silence, given that Quiet Tony is usually only ever seen at the same time as Sleeping Tony or Hungover Tony. The corner of his mouth ticks up into a faint sort of smile, holding the tablet in one hand now as he rests his palm atop Nat's head and strokes his thumb against her temple.

"You know," he says after a moment, "People are never going to believe we got married and you had to buy off the rack and affordable. You heard I'm something like the world's twentieth richest man, right? We can afford to get something made. Our co-worker is the most famous fashion designer on the planet."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    "I'm keenly aware." Natasha says without opening her eyes, though a hint of a smile tugs at her lips, tilting her head back and forth idly in Tony's lap as he touches her. She's still getting used to this kind of casual contac. Most of her 'relationships' never get past the 'frenzied excitement' phase.
    And they usually kinda die or get mangled before they get very far with that.
    Natasha grumbles softly and turns onto her side, putting her back to Tony, setting her lidded drink on the table, and idly rubbing his leg just below the knee. "Affordable can be pretty." She protests weakly, and narrowly opens her eyes to look out at the lounge. "... Janet will blow a fuse. She will... sincerely lose her mind. And I will never hear the end of it." She sighs. "... Do you know she already guessed at us? She will never buy this."

Tony Stark has posed:
"She did?"

That little revelation seems to surprise Tony a bit, and his eyebrows raise. He looks up from the tablet for a moment, staring down at the back of Natasha's head where she lays there. He shifts his hand to rest on her upper arm, trailing fingers up and down in a casual, idle motion.

"I suppose if anybody was going to, it'd be her," he says at last, "She's got that Van Dyne craftiness. Hell, she invented that Van Dyne craftiness. They paint her as all molly and high society, but she didn't get where she is without reading people."

He gives Nat's shoulder a squeeze, as though to punctuate his words: "That just proves my point. You're gonna have to ask her, or else she's going to be pissed off. She'd never let us hear the end of it if we didn't invite her to our fake wedding."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Natasha gives an affirmative "Mmm." when Tony asks to confirm about Janet. "Got me drunk to talk about it and everything." She says, admittedly making it sound a bit more planned out and sinister than it really was.
    "... You're right. You're right. She'll- oooohhhhh..." Natasha groans, exaggeratedly demoralized with her realization as she rolls onto her back again and looks up at Tony. "... It's gonna have to be all of them, isn't it? The Avengers are all coming to our wedding. We can't just dash it off in Vegas and..." she closes her eyes and ruefully half laughs the words, "... and all my friends are secret ageeeennnnts...."
    Friends is a strong word, in most cases; or at any rate it's a word Natasha doesn't throw around willy nilly even when it's patently true; but the point remains.

Tony Stark has posed:
"Hey, that's not true," Tony says warmly, giving Nat's arm another little squeeze, "Some of your friends are mythical beings from other dimensions. One of them's a robot. The list goes on."

It's fun, sometimes, to highlight just how weird their lives are. They're two ordinary human beings who frequently consort with gods and others who meet the qualifications to be gods but haven't filed all the paperwork yet. He waggles the tablet at her a little, leaning over her gently to lay it down on the table before resting back comfortable on the couch.

"Think of it this way," he offers, "All we need are the photos. We knock those out in, what? An afternoon? Then it's done. At least we didn't have to actually stage the whole thing."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Natasha smiles despite herself, shoulders shaking with a silently laugh that can mostly be heard as soft little exhalations from her nose. "... That's what I keep you around for. Perspective." She says dryly, squeezing the back of the hand Tony's touching her shoulder with.
    "... It's all this country, you know. America's..." Natasha shakes her head as words fail her, and instead she makes a wobbily hand gesture with splayed fingers. "... The craziest thing we had in Russia was a were-bear. We weren't allowed to talk about him."
    Blue eyes look back up at Tony as he gives his optimistic appraisal of the time and effort involved, and a bit of a wry smile comes to her lips. "... Tony." She says softly, then reiterates: "*Tony.*" her free hand travels up to squeeze Tony's bicep as she says, "... You know who we're talking about here."

Tony Stark has posed:
"Yeah," Tony says with a bit of a sigh, realising he's shooting for the moon on that score, "I figure Thor is gonna want to celebrate regardless of how fake it is. I don't know if we can drag T'Challa away from the embassy. I'm not even sure where Pym even is right now. Plus, there's that new guy. Cap's going to just be ... I don't know. Amused? Bemused? One of the 'museds."

Still, he can't help but laugh. The whole thing is just crazy. Their relationship had only just started. It had been faltering, too. He was almost convinced he wouldn't happen more than a few times. Hell, he'd lied to Power Girl about it - told her that it had fallen through in the end, pretending the cover was just that. A cover. Which it was. Sort of. He'd have to come clean about that at some point, too.

"Were-bear?" he says suddenly, as though he'd missed that with everything else going on, "I wanna see the were-bear."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    "We probably don't want to pull the King of Wakanda into subterfuge anyway, if we can help it." Natasha notes thoughtfully. though she nods slowly as Tony speaks, just... soaking in the subtly complex madness of their lives. For all the hassle, she's struck speechless every time she thinks that she might have passed up this life when it was offered to her back in the day. Not that it was pitched to her in quite these terms.
    Their relationship looked like an upward trend to an outside observer, but truthfully Nat had talked herself in and out of it a half dozen times - sometimes under the influence of alcohol - before a Hydra assassin pushed things forward for them.
    In fairness... she's pretty sure she would have taken Tony up on this even if it wasn't convenient for the cover.
    Right?
    Hrm.
    "... I don't care to share the fair were-bear." Natasha says regretfully, though with a smile; taking a rare opportunity to enjoy English. "Maybe when you're President you can crack open some classified files."

Tony Stark has posed:
Tony puts on a look of faux dejection at not being able to see the were-bear. Asgardian gods and robots and super-humans are one thing but a guy who turns into a bear? That'd be wild.

"You know, that's the first thing I'm going to look into. The Russian were-bear and how they faked the moon landing. I'm looking to fake a Mars landing, myself. Hell, why stop there? Let's fake a landing on Jupiter. The sun! We can fake land everywhere!"

He's just playing at this point, and he lifts up his smoothie to take another quick sip of it.

"So, where'd we go on our honeymoon? Anywhere good?"

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Natasha smirks and teases, "You'll just get carried away and build a real ship to Mars."
    Tony's question does seem to catch the agent offguard, however, and she blinks owlishly in silence. "Uh." She says, as if she's about to name someplace, then lets several seconds pass before concluding. "... Hm."
    Natasha finally sits up and retrieves her own smoothie, bringing it to her lips and sipping it as a stalling tactic. "... Somewhere... sunny?" She turns this over in her head. "... With a beach." She gives a determined nod of her head... and then slides her eyes to the side, second guessing it. "Maybe. ... Where, uh. Where sounds fun?"

Tony Stark has posed:
"Oh my god," Tony says slowly, leaning down to wrap her in his arms and kiss her several times upon the forehead, "Oh my god, you've never had a vacation, have you? Oh, Mrs. Rushman-Stark we need to fix that right away. We've got a while before we really get into the meat of the primaries and I can't be out of the public eye. I need to take you somewhere. Sunny. With a beach."

Even after he's done pretending to faun over her in the extreme he keeps his arms wrapped around her, giving her an affectionate squeeze and seeming to pre-empt what she might say.

"No arguing. You can afford a couple days off the radar. We'll call it a fact-finding mission or something."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    Natasha Romanoff visibly deflates as Tony reaches the inevitable conclusion, groaning, "Noooooo..." as she's pulled into his arms, but offering no real resistance as she fawns over her, eyes closed but unable to suppress as smile, ragdolling a bit as she's rocked back and forth, and talking even while Tony continues to speak, "Nooo. Nope. Wrong. You're wrooonng. I've definitely..." she sighs and admits, "... *never* had a vacation." in a whisper.
    "Oh my god..." Natasha sighs and covers her eye with one hand. "Uuuuhhhhhhh...!" Natasha sniffs once sharply and says. "You're serious. You're actually- you're *actually* serious. Okay. Ooookay. Uh..." She presses her lips very tightly together in an 'I can't believe this' sort of smile and shakes her head. "This is- if you do this!" She ascribes it to Tony as if he's the only one embarking on this idea that happens to include bringing her somewhere pretty, "*If* you do this... it is the *last* bad habit I'm going to take up. All year. So. Think about that first."
    She says that, but she's still smiling.

Tony Stark has posed:
"Do I count as a bad habit?" Tony asks, tilting his head slightly to one side and looking at Natasha sidelong, "Because I don't think I'm that bad of a habit. I'm like a pot habit. Not great, but better than smoking."

Her reaction draws actual delight from him, as though everything else in his life - trying to become president, being Iron Man, being an Avenger - all of it falls by the wayside at the notion of taking Nat on a real, honest to god vacation. He gives her another affectionate squeeze of a hug, before he draws her in close and leans back against the cushions.

"I've got a few ideas," he tells her, mind already percolating, "We had a Christmas Party a few years back. Rented an island down in Belize. I'm thinking I give that guy a call and rent it out again. Just the pair of us."

Natasha Romanoff has posed:
    The answer is 'yes, you are probably a bad habit as far as my profession is concerned', but Nat just smirks a little at the question, before giving a pleasantly defeated sigh. "You are... better than smoking, I'll say that much." before she's pulled in close to him.
    Ah, hell with it. She puts her arms around him too, and puts her ear to his chest, curling up a bit with him.
    "Beliiiiize..." Natasha repeats, as if needing to stretch the word out to find the place in her memory, before she smiles a little, murmuring, "That place is gorgeous, actually." as if admitting to some shame, though it's followed by a grin. "A whole island? Just to ourselves?" She shuffles her legs together a little bit and peers up at Tony. "... That could be nice."
    She rethinks that for a second.
    "... That *would* be nice."
    She smiles.
    "*Terribly* irresponsible, though."