Owner Pose
Monet St. Croix For the abductees, existence would come in by a flash of light. Themselves all over in large, laboratory style glass tubes. Suspended up in the air floating above a barren plain with nothing but clouds in every direction. Chanting would be coming i as if being piped in from all over, despite the lack of any sort of immediate crowd.
    "MOJO! MOJO! MOJO! MOJO!" The chanting would go higher and higher, being near impossible to pinpoint.
    Up in the air would flash a giant Valentines Day style <3 and a series of pink fireworks erupting along it.
Tabitha Smith There are groans from one tube that contains an explosive blonde while consciousness is a continued debate. And maybe a clunk of a forehead against the tube itself as she tries to wake up or at least figure out what may or may not going on.

At least she's dressed, sure it's bumming around her dorm dressed but still. So that means oversized gray hoodie that may or may not be used for pajamas and some dark blue jeans she might have been wearing while working the tables at Harrys. Bare feet and a lack of anything in her hair hinting she had been settling in for the night before flashy light and maybe waking up it a tube. "Fiiiiiiive more minutes?" she says in a droning voice needing coffee more than she does life itself.
Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde leans forward, hands curled into fists and resting them against the glass tube that encases her. "What the ever loving h-" she starts to say, when the chanting causes her to cut off whatever she was about to say that might have raised the parental advisory level.

She lets out a groan and rubs a hand down her face from her eyes to her chin. The sight of the big heart and the fireworks only seem to make matters worse. "I was having the Henry Cavill dream, darn you!" she yells, shaking a fist in no particular direction. Her attire suggests that was possible, wearing a pair of boxer shorts and a light tank style t-shirt with the Oxford University logo on it, and her hair a bit mussed up looking.
Stella Roundtree      And here Stella was just feeling sorry for herself and wandering around the night-time city when- TUBE. She's still clad in her bar-hopping apparel, jeans, boots, and a jacket, as she looks out of the glass. It's sort of pretty for a moment, all the clouds, the hearts. And terrifying for similar reasons. So the self-pity is shelved in favor of survival instinct as she lets the images coalesce. Some faces are familiar, but most are not. But everything looks strange to the energy-detecting mutant, and she timidly pokes at the glass with a finger, then knocks on it a few times.
Jubilation Lee     It hasn't even been a whole night since Jubilation Lee's rescue and safe return to Xavier's. Upon her return, the door to the apartment was shut, locked, and that was that. It was understood that only people with a death wish should knock on that door. But then, suddenly, whatever was going on in that apartment is no longer going on in that apartment. It's going on in a weird glass tube suspended in the clouds.

Jubilee is reclined on the 'floor' of the glass tube, her back arched a little, and her fingers raked into her long, black-brown hair. She's wearing a t-shirt with the words 'MINIMUM EFFORT' printed across the breast, though it has been pulled down a bit so one of her shoulders is bare, peeking out from the neck hole. Her long, dark hair is messy... and not on purpose.

    Jubes is caught in the middle of a loud exhale, which is kind of strange since she doesn't breathe anymore. Any sound that might come from her lungs is deliberate and meant to communicate something. "...Ahh--- what!" Jubes sits up suddenly, wide-eyed, and stares out at the infinite sky.

    "NO!" she shrieks, slamming a fist against the tube. She just got rescued!
Jean Grey Well, this is... no, actually, it's not new.

Indeed, being suspended in suspiciously experiment-y glass floaty tubes is a state that Jean is probably more familiar with than she'd prefer. At least the circumstances, and their particularly holiday theming, is a bit more jovial than what she's had to deal with in the past, with this sort of thing. Not that it terribly bodes well regardless. Since they've all been caught in off hours, she appears in some kind of oversized comfy sweater with pajama pants and fluffy slippers. She's also holding out a hand as if she had something in it. But not any more.

As disoriented as everyone, she murmurs some kind of low 'what the...' before her brain slowly catches up, and she looks around. Soon she notices at least that there's many of them all suspended together, and so she quickly presses her hands up to the glass and her face nearly to it, to get as much of a view as she can of those nearby and try and get some kind of headcount.

Naturally, her instinct is also to reach out and see if she can contact everyone mentally... although her experience with containment tubes rates the chances of this working as maybe low-to-poor.
Noriko Ashida Is this some kind of cosmic joke?  Did Noriko just get knocked out and this is some coma dream?  Noriko experiences everything much faster than the others but the strange scenery throws her for a loop at first.  In a similar position to Jubilation in her own tube, Noriko leans toward the glass, a grin forming at her lips, eyes closed.  Then the chanting starts happening.

Noriko's eyes shoot open wide and she instantly knows this is not a dream.  She immediately appears a blur like a cartoon as she also quickly adjusts her attire....there's not much to do.  The other is she's just in a sports bra, some short shorts, and no footwear.  The strangest thing?  She has no gauntlets on.  Her face flashes red and a thin bolt of lightning strikes out at the glass from her shoulder.  "JUBES?!"  Noriko looks around frantically and hugs her own middle with her suddenly naked feeling arms.  "Shit, shit, shit..." she murmurs.  Another ZAP like a lightning bug trapped in a bottle.
Rogue Rogue is wearing her leather bomber jacket and a hoodie with blue jeans when she wakes up inside of this tube. She's also holding a donut with pink icing and little sprinkles. She looks around at the glass, and then at her donut, which she promptly drops.

"What the hell is this? Christ all---" A series of curse words come out of the Belle as she puts her hands on the glass, then balls up a fist and tries to punch her hand through the glass!
James Proudstar James Proudstar sighs and stretches, looking cramped in the tube. He presses against the walls, "Size-ist B-" The rest of his word cut off by the crowd. He presses against the tube he occupies bracing himself against the walls. Jim it seems was also attired for bed a rarity but it happens. He's wearing just a pair of jogging shorts.
Monet St. Croix Jean is able to make contact wtih everyone on the team. Everything feels fuzzy, a bit off. A sense of strangeness over. Well..
    "HEEEYYYY MEATBAGS! WElcome to the MOJO-WORLD HOLIDAY SPECIAL! Where every holiday is a celebration of me! MOJO!" Flashing up in teh air would be a figure that appeared to be some sort of huge greenish blob-snail suspended on some sort of exoskeleton. Huge glands of flab bouncing on him.
    "I am MOJO! Your Director!" A huge holographic image of Mojo appearing in the air, then as the group would suddenly find themselves over in a giant Colloseum styled arena.
    Countless individuals would be in the stands that went up cartoonishly high of unknown species.
    "Here at the Mojo-Verse Holiday Special, we have stakes! Games! MURDER AND MAYHEM! The prize is.. YOUR LIFE!" Very small text would flash across the screen if one squinted. 'Survival not guaranteed, quality not guaranteed, void wehre prohibited, contestants forfeit all royalties for participation, etc'.
    Mojo is busy on the holo speaking to a floating figure next to him, "... I was thinking of going with spinning a giant wheel but that's overdone. I dunno, throwing darts? But tha sounds like effort. Poll the audience? Nahh, those guys are idiots."
    Major Domo would gesture, "Sir, we're live on camera."
    "DAMMIT!" Mojo would flail his arms wildly.
Tabitha Smith Tabby probably hasn't picked up on any mind link yet which is probably not fun for anyone on the party line. But at least when Mojo starts piping in again and it's clear the blonde is awake and just groggy she groans and growls. On the upside she's not thinking any dirty thoughts now.

But since murdering Mojo is probably still not safe for work some folks may want to look away.

"This bullshit again? Ugh, seriously." she says and starts putting hands all over the inside of the tube like she's trying to find a primo spot for blasting her way out of the tube. Or making a blast outside the tube to get herself loose. This may be a bad idea.
Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde already has tried to phase through the container that holds her, but isn't surprised to find that she's unable to pass through. This isn't Mojo's first encounter with them, and he's not likely to let them escape before his show has even begun.

She turns to look over at the others, taking stock of who all have been abducted alongside her. Everyone is familiar to her except Stella. Kitty calls over towards her, unsure if she'll be able to hear. "Hello... you're going to be ok. Just follow our lead! Are you familiar with... this thing," Kitty says, not feeling charitable in her description of Mojo. "Is this the first time you've been abducted like this?"
Stella Roundtree      Yeah, this seems bad, and at least Stella knows that she'll land on her feet. Eventually. And thus, she braces herself against the inside of the tube and gets ready to kick. "Is this a regular mutant thing?" calls Stella. "Like a city thing? Because it's all new to me," she says. Her voice is very LOUD as she yells towards Kitty. Louder than it should be inside the glass. And then she realizes she doesn't have to be, and calms down a little. "I'll follow along," she says with a nod, cheeks a bit pink from embarrassment.
Jean Grey There is a sense of relief as Jean is able to touch some of the minds around her, even throughout whatever fog. Relief that she can contact them, anyway: probably no one is too happy about being here in the first place. <<Seems like... everyone alright? If you've never... this guy, well, you can probably pick up on the the twisted gameshow routine.>>

Somewhere in this, she's bound to notice that there is, as well, an UNFAMILIAR presence here. Who in turn may notice the oddity of having people's thoughts piped through like some kind of superpowered chat server. <<Can you hear me? Try and keep calm. It... I wouldn't call it normal. But not new, either. The best strategy is usually... to kind of play along and look out for openings.>>

Which informs the rest of Jean's strategy. She doesn't struggle to break the tube - the feeling of her muddled telepathy is enough to know her powers are probably a bit on the fritz. Better not to mess with anything else until she needs it. "Alright," she calls out, aloud now. So why don't you tell us the rules so we can get this show on the road?"
James Proudstar James Proudstar is looking down at the coliseum grimly, he sighs having spent a bit too much time fighting for the amusement of others in the last six months to find it other than grim. He doesn't look over but offers, "Kitty, Stella, Stella Kitty. She can handle herself in a fight, even through a decent punch, though I'm not sure what her power is." He tens calls out the rest of our names as no one is in costume anyway. "And that's mojo." Eyeroll, "Bringing us to a coliseum to fight for our lives. He's still focused down studying Coliseum and Jean may say the sort of seriousnes his brother John always wore. When he stops and turns to look over at Stella, "Did you give Colleen a call?"
Jubilation Lee     "No! No no no no!" Jubilee screams like a petulant child. Lacking the usual self-consciousness that comes with being a teenager, she doesn't bother repositioning her shirt or fixing her hair. Yeah, Mojo found her during a private moment, so what? Who cares!

    When the image of Mojo appears, Jubilation glares at it, staring. After a beat, she forms a fist. "Newman!" she growls. The resemblance is... uncanny.

    Kitty's inability to phase through her tube isn't enough to stop Jubilee from trying, though. The vampiress's physical form starts to break apart and dissolve into a thick, cloud of mist. No good. Instead of going through the tube's glass, the mist just floats and expands. That's what clouds do, right? "If we're in a human zoo, I'd just like to point out that I'm not one!" Even as a vampire mist, Jubilee is a pain in the butt.

    The mist reforms, solidifying into Jubilation Lee again. "Come on! I just got back! I have /needs/!"
Rogue Mind connections be damned!

Rogue is just a flurry of punching at the glass.

Again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again!

From her tube comes muffled thuds of her fists on the glass as she does this, along with the sounds of her shouting curse words about 'SPACE' and 'NERDS' and lots of colorful language descriptors to go along with this.

It seems she's not very happy about this situation.
Tabitha Smith "Stella? You okay?" Tabby states and shoves her cheek against the tube while trying to look to see whome else is around but mostly the blonde just smooshes her face and makes that squeegee on glass sound.

"I think the bastard has a fetish for us but he does dabble away from Mutants and X-men on occasion. Probably a..." There is a mind link and Tabby perks at least a little.

Now she;s being a bit quieter if not mentally. <<Last time was a demolition derby with giant robots. Mojo probably has some major ADHD.>> Says the woman with her own issues, "So I think he just goes wherever his brain goes. Thank goodness he doesn't seem to have junk driviing him. The fat nerd thinks we're toys and props!" she says aloud.
Noriko Ashida Noriko isn't trying to break out.  SHE'S TRYING TO STAY IN.  Did you see what happened to that donut?  No?  ISN'T THAT WORSE?!  She starts to groan a little at the prospect of not having her gauntlets nor having taken anything to dampen her powers.  But then she sees Jean and starts to ease up a little.  But then why isn't Jean communicating with them.  A new flood of panic invades the speedster's synapses and she completely misses the specifics of Jean's communication as her brain buzzes right through it.  Still, she perceives the communication and immediately calms again, drawing a deep breath as she slows herself down.

"This is going to suck," Noriko says under her breath as she tries to block everything else out to concentrate.  The cheers, the people talking through their tubes, the voice in her head, THOSE NEEDS.  None of that will matter if she can't keep it together.
Monet St. Croix Up on the screen, Mojo goes, "Neener Neener Neener! But! First on the Mojo Holiday special! Do you feel like your winter season is getting compressed? While most of our viewing audience isn't from the 'eww' dimension called 'The United SUCKS OF AMERICA', we're willing to help accommodate participation! Three holidays right around one another all squished together! In the same month even!"
    Majordomo would whisper, "Actually spread over roughly two months yoru lardiness."
    "We'll edit it in post! But.. Halloween! Thanksgiving! Christmas! Here at Mojo we want to help! And so we present THANKSHALLOWMAS!"
    dozens and dozens of Nutcrackers wielding pitchforks and pumpkin heads. Gingerbread men with Pilgrim hats and wishbones broken in half to make shivs. And a legion of enormous looking turkeys that had large beards, Santa hats, hockey masks, and chainsaws.
    "Sir, I believe that you've taken the idea from a webcomic." Majordomo would warn flatly.
    "So? The guy like.. Does a comic on the INTERNETS. Can he afford lawyers?" "Unlikely Sir." "Then we're GOOD TO GO FOR CULTURAL APPROPRIATION!"
    The tubes would all release, and the poor merry mutants (and unrelated guest star!) would be dropped down from them facing a ridiculous revival scenario!
    "IIITTTSSS SHOWTIME!"
    Right as a horde of classic style goblins and fae wearing clown masks and rubber noses with ballet suits on would go to charge at them as they would tumble!
    "X-CHICKENS! I WELCOME YOU.. TO DIE!" Mojo would laugh fiendishly. Major Domo would again correct, "You used that the last time you kidnapped them, your lboatedness."
    "DAMMIT! WHO THE HELL WRITES MY SCRIPTS!?" You do your heinousness."
Stella Roundtree      "Oh! Hi Tabby!" Stella says, waving like an idiot. It's always comforting to see people you almost know! "Well I don't know, people seem kind of worried and very mad, but it sounds like this is something that happens regularly? And you're all here... though maybe that's just the survivors..." she trails as the screen broadcasts a barrage of admittedly imaginative ideas. Which is distracting for the drop. She screams as she falls and then starts slowing, not quite hovering, but definitely descending like there's an invisible parachute keeping her from facing the the masked mob below.
James Proudstar James Proudstar floats to the ground and lands between the X-ers and the goblins. Eyeing them as they approach and striking without restraint when they're near enough. "They're like rejects from one of Magik's danger room runs. James wades into combat like the Fezzik sized brute squad he is, keeping the Gonlins focused on him so the others can plan and regroup.
Noriko Ashida "-k me," Noriko deadpans when Thankshallowmas is announced to the avalanche of Murdercrackers.  As soon as Noriko feels gravity beginning to take effect, she scrambles, knowing she's destined to fall.  She erupts in a little blast of lightning that radiates from her body as she falls from the tube like some stubborn last drop.  "ROGUE!" she shouts on her descent to the horde of tiny clown abominations.
Tabitha Smith Finally she's pout of the tube and then theres thuds and bomps and clunks as Tabby rolls about and picks herself up to see whom else is actually there beyond the voices she heard in her ears and her brains. Sure she kinda pauses to ogle Jimmy and nibble thatlower lip but she soon shakes her head. "Nope, gotta focus." she states and turns to the myriad legion of varying holiday abominations.

With a number of Ginger Pilgrims and a Turkey Vorhees bearing down on her the blonde waves right back to Stella. "So go nuts. These guys are like punching Nazis or Ninjas." she states in agreement with the halfnaked giant ex-boyfriend before extending a finger to her would be assailants to wait.

Boom-Boom then slips hands under the hem of her hoodie.

Tabitha seems to be doing her pants and a belt up before they end up around her ankles.
Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde gives James a nod at the information about Stella. "Good. Well we'll pull through this. Just try to stick with us and help work as a team," she calls over.

And then Mojo reveals what they will be facing. Kitty looks down at all the creatures that are waiting to kill them. She calls back over to Stella, "Well it could be worse, last time for me we got turned into a bunch of goa-!"

Kitty's sharing session is cut off as she's dropped out of the tube unceremoniously. She lands in a crouch before standing back upright again. Superhero landing! Kitty looks up at Mojo and shakes a fist. "You religiously insensitive lout. I'm Jewish!"

She turns back towards their adversaries as a pair of Nutcrackers charge forward towards her. "I like the ballet version so much better," she says as she leaps to the side of a stabbing pitchfork. She doesn't know if these automatons or creatures or whatever they are, know the X-men's powers, but she isn't going to give hers away to them until she has to. She ducks under another stab and kicks at a leg with a sweeping spin, hitting it behind the knee and knocking the Pumpkinhead Nutcracker down.
Jubilation Lee     It's been a weird couple of seconds. Finally, Jubilation bothers to look beyond her own tube and think and feel beyond her basic needs and wants. There's Noriko, and Kitty, and Rogue, and Tabby, and James, and... some girl who seems like she's from a flyover state. She knows Tabby, though. Is that a plus or a minus, Jubilee wonders? She doesn't have enough time to work it out for herself, though, before her tube opens.

    Jubilee would also call out to Rogue, the resident flyer, sure, but things are different now. At some point in her fall, Jubilation's physical form breaks apart again. A thick, gothic mist lazily makes its way towards the ground. Vampires might defy the laws of life and death itself but gravity, unfortunately, is another story. Eventually, the mist is close enough to the ground so that Jubilation can solidify with almost no fall!

    As soon as Jubilee's feet are on the ground, her head is on a swivel. "Rogue, get her!" she shouts, pointing up at the falling Noriko Ashida.
Stella Roundtree      "I guess those would be the most punchable of categories!" Stella says to Tabby as she lands evenly on her feet. She asks, "Turned into..." she runs straight at some of turkeys, air rippling in front of her. The chainsaw in the nearest plucked, greasy wings sparking and tilting back into the bird as she runs.
     It doesn't smell too bad, truth be told!
     "Uh... turned into goats? Goal...ies?" she finishes, a half-hockey mask flying past as the turkey wobbles backwards, and a gingerbread man takes a stab at her with one of those very sharp wishbones. It catches her jacket, but thankfully not any skin.
Jean Grey Far be it for Jean to argue with Rogue getting some frustrations out with futile smashing! Still, she waits. Focuses. Seeks her inner calm. Goofy thinky people stuff!

... until they're finally, unceremoniously, dropped.

Jean does what she can to cushion the drop, manging a wobbly hover as she lands. "Wait, what happened to Valentines Day?" That one didn't sound half bad. Instead, they get a weird holiday mix of monster critters wielding poky things. <<Obviously don't play along when the game is 'stab you,'>> she adds, in a quick mental addendum. Presumably unecessarily, but who knows. There's a newbie! It's good to communicate clearly! <<Form up, don't let them separate you.>>

With a clear threat, there's a clearer solution - or at least course of action: determine tactics and execute. Most of them have trained to do exactly that. <<Jammes, Rogue, you're our tank line.>> She, naturally, graviates to the middle, home of the squishies. And still not 100% sure on the rules on her powers, starts out... small? Well, simple. Lifting a hand to her temple, the other gestures, first lifted, palm up - and bringing a section of whatever earth or 'studio' material there is beneath them floating upward - and then outward, sending a barrage of rubble toward the horde. Back to Jean basics.
Rogue Rogue is continuing to punch on the glass bottle until it opens up and she glides out. Her arms and legs coming together, heading straight for Jubilee, but she sees the girl already handling herself with some fancy new vampire skills, thus she stops, and adjusts course to go toward the battle on the ground.

With a deep inhale, Rogue tosses off her jacket, unzips her hoodie, tosses that aside too, then rips the sleeves off her long sleeve tshirt.

Why? Who knows.

Either way, she starts flying toward the enemies on the ground, taking the front, tanky lead!

She lands with a heavy thud to the ground, then rises up, glaring at the badies, where she starts to draw them toward her, before she does a rolling steamrolly maneuver that has her going right over the creepy menaces, bowling them down!
Tabitha Smith Hands come out from under her oversized top. Sadly still too small for James to cover up. And anything he might have left behind would have just been a tent on the blonde.

A grin is aimed at Tabby's would be attackers and she slashes at the air with fingers wide. Then comes the plasma in streams, crackling and booming as she guides them psionically, expanding the blasts to about the size of a softball and one for each digit. They sail and dance above gingerbread pilgrims and the Jason Turky and circle like those whispy things at the end of a good Ghostbusters movie.

Then they strike.

BOOM Headshots. Firey plasma igniting and taking the gingerbread apart in hhefty chunks while a flash of light blows the mask of the turkey and roasts it was down the neck stup.

When the turkey drops amongst burnt gingerbread the blonde can't help herself. Some things are too great to resist.

"Lets cook!"

When the orders come in, Tabby jumps in and is pretty much THE squishy. Since everyone else maybe kinda has a means to not get hurt on an attack.
Monet St. Croix The Nutcrackers go to hold off, staying at long range as from their teeth would sprout out huge cannons! They would go to start to fire off machine gunb ursts at the group made out of CANDY CORN. Shrapnel blasting through the air towards our intrepid heroes at high speed!
    Warpath would face off against the goblins who would try to swarm over him! One of them going to try and jam a large candy cane in his mouth while another would try to blind him with cotton candy as they would try to tie him up in some of the weirdest restraints known to man. CHRISTMAS LIGHTS.
    As Tabitha goes to remember that it is pants-o-clock, she's faced over by a group of small faced midget children that are arming up a series of RED-DETH RYDER BBGUNS while chanting in their adorable cowboy hats, "They'll put more than your eye out! They'll do your entire head!"
    Kitty goes to correct Mojo on the left out cultural depths of the holidays as Kitty goes to work her way through a Nutcracker as it would go down! A group of turkeys would surround her with chainsaws. "C'MON! LET'S STUFF HER GIBLETS!" Another would correct, "Use her to stuff OUR giblets!"
    Going to chase along after Jubilee would be a familiar thing from the nightmares of children. A fruit'ish looking brute made of various gummies latched together. A sweet looking sugar infused being going, "I VANT TEW SUUK URR SUCROSE!" Advancing on her. "Now I weel have my SWEET revenge as a CEREAL KILLER!"
    As Stella lands, a gingerbread ninja star would whoosh past her. And she would have going along at her a horde of.. THANKSGIVING LEFTOVERS. Bones, meat.. All turned a scurvy-like shade of green wielding eighties style weapons made out of candy!
    Jean is in circumstances where she can control things. Going to pick up debris, hurl it, clear a path.. Right up until there's some sort of section that looks like some sort of flora-specced mold of a vageusly sweet'ish sort of scent going through the air. Some Gummy Bears wearing pirate hats are going to load it up and over into a trebuchet as they would ready. They were bringing out one of those most hideous of leftovers.
    FRUITCAKE. Projectiles launched through the air, sturdier than stone and speaking of eternal life and disappointment that could top even holofoil multiple release covers!
    Then Rogue is going to pummel, plow, punch, and brawl her way on through everything over as a loud 'CHOO CHOO' could be heard in challenge. Wait, a.. Choo Choo? Facing off with her would be some sort of huge looking abomination of a rail engine named 'Tommass' but with a huge hockey mask on his face. Engine revving up, track going laid down, horn tooting, sawblades ou t.
    Meanwhile Noriko would see a number of.. Little.. Children.. That were scurring along. "We gotta help 'em!" What would look like Ororo in punk wear with a mohawk about two or three feet tall would scurry.
    "Yeah!" What looked like Logan but with a chipped tooth and a partial lisp, also the same size would run along with him. And part of the grou of a dozen or so precious little children would be what was clearly a pair of miniature versions of her and Jubilee, running hand in hand together.
    Jeans would call out, "X-BABIES! CHAARRRGGGEEE!"
Noriko Ashida A long time ago, Noriko thought seeming to experience impact slower would make it not as bad.  It's instinctual and something she found out rather quickly just is not true.  PHYSICS.

"ROGUE?! WHAT THE F-" but it's swallowed up by Nori's own speed as it shoots out of her mouth.  Nori never prepared for this scenario.  She's not in a giant egg...wait...she /did/ prepare for this scenario.  "JUBES!"  And you said don't go in the Danger Room ever again alone Jubes...well you'd be proud, she hasn't.
Jubilation Lee     "No! No! Not /me/!" Jubilation shouts at Rogue, waving her arm in the air. "Not me! /Nori/! You gottam catch N--- Oh come on..." She takes off running, doing what no Duchess before her has ever done: anything! Jubilation sprints forward, runrunrun in the direction she expects the speedster to land. Leap left, juke right, goth mist past a Nutcracker, solid again, round-house-kick-to-the-face-rex-kwon-do-style. Nutcrackers and gingerbread men meet vampire fist and leg! Pause. Wait.

    Jubilation turns and runs back a few feet so she can slam her fist across the jaw of the Gummie Brute. Several times. "WE. DONT. LIKE. BEING. IMITATED. TELL. JIM. HENSON. THANKS." And she's back on the hunt!

    "I'm coming, I'm coming!" she shouts. Pause. Rewind. "I'm on my way! I'm on my way!"

    "Damnit, Rogue. If we get out of this, that dog of yours is history..." Jubilee mutters as she vaults over another would-be holiday attacker! The Beast within her, her dark passenger, the vampire id, forced her to say that. She'd /never/ hurt Rogue's dog... Promise!

    Much to the delight of Mojo's audience, Noriko Ashida -- the badass speedster with a secret heart of gold -- comes to a sudden stop in a princess carry. Jubilation takes a moment to give a little smile to the blue-haired mutant. "Gotcha," she whispers. There's a brief moment where it seems like Jubilation might get captured by the moment, distracted by the romance and pageantry, buuuuuuuut.... She sets Noriko down. A subset of the audience boo's at this decision. Creeps.

    And then, Jubilation and Noriko would find themselves going toe-to-toe with the X-Babies. "Uh... " Jubes backs up a bit, both arms extended forward in a readied stance. "...I..uh... think children are...our future..." she tries. Maybe they could be reasoned with?
Tabitha Smith Another wave. Cowboy Midget Children, Totally not BB pellet guns! Tabby skids almost at the squishy line and frowns at the kids as they make their boast and even fire at her as she dodges and scrambles crawling around to get a good opening for herself, more than a few shots scrape at her and leave some very painfull looking hits that knock her around almost like a ragdoll and leave some holes in and bruises and cuts. "That's my ass you little shits!" she yells out as she finally gets a clear moment and wobbles to her knees.

"Nice trick! I can do that too!" she threatens back and starts throwing a plasma stream around and knocking the children down one by one, leaing smouldering messes. But when they drop Tabby might throw extra bombs to kick any small children when they're down. And maybe sign her name.

"TABI" in bodies and scorch marks. She ran out of midget children but there's always more things to 'splode.

Scrambling and slowly wobbling to the squishy line. "Ow!" she groans.
Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde grabs the pitchfork from the downed Nutcracker, phasing as its partner stabs through her, and then using her own weapon to stab it through the bottom of its pumpkinhead. She twists and splits it apart, the Nutcracker going down.

Pumpkin guts are wiped from Kitty's face as she turns and sees the turkeys wielding chainsaws moving to surround her. "Alright," Kitty says to them, hefting the pitchfork. "I actually practiced making Thanksgiving dinner for Warren. How hard could this b-"

She has to duck as a chainsaw roars as it viciously tries to cut through where her neck used to be. From there she disappears behind turkey wings that swing back and forth trying to hit her with their chainsaws!
Noriko Ashida Noriko just closes her eyes.  Talk about a trust fall.  She at least tucks her gauntlets in so she doesn't cave in Jubes' head or anything.  She curls up a little and then BOOM, she's in Jubilation's arms.  She lets out a deep breath she'd kept holding the whole time.  She squirms to steal a little peck as she's being set down but misses.  This only adds to the ire of the audience and the boos get her attention.  She forgot they were on MojoTV.

"Uh...Jubes.  I don't have my gauntlets...I can't.  I don't want to hurt anyone."  Noriko sprints back behind Jubilation, keeping the vampire as an insulator between her and the babies as they defend themselves.
Monet St. Croix Tabitha is facing off against a horde of sugar infused sweetness. Even as she's going to blast her way through a gingerbread man, it's coming through the other side of her plasmoids over with a.. Metal exoskeleton beneath!? Advancing on her over and moving to take out a shotgun armed with candy corn it would call out, "Yew cannot beat my thirty days unlimited warranty! Your DEATH! Guarnteed or your money back!? Wait, she had paid!?
    Jubilee would leap up through the air, managing to do a pirouette and catch as hearts and flashes "ould erupt through the air, including a series of sparkles going over around her as up above Mojo would chant, "Aww, the power of LUVV! It's so adorable. It makes me want to dry heave!?
    Major Domo would go, "Please don't your lboatedness, you know what that does to your audience share."
    Mojo would sob, "But the way those fleshy things LOOK at one another and I'm GONNA!" Mojo would race off camera as a 'TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES' sign would replace the holo, showing a toaster being dropped into a bathtub.
    Meanwhile, Rainy (aka X-Baby Storm) would go, "We wanna help! You've helped us in the past! 'An Mojo keeps on tryin' to kill us 'cuz he wants to appeal to the hardcore demografix!" The children were sweet, weird looking, and apparently unphased by the constant state of murder-domo that was the Mojoverse.
    'Lil Logan would nod, "Yeah! We need to help you get out of here!" An adorable, chibi version of Logan about the size of ahousecat might break brains or inspire more adorableness than ever.
Jean Grey "This is a little weird, even for MojoWorld," Jean has to admit, as she sees a mob of miniature dopplegangers charging them.

In the middle of things, after launching a volley of debris, she turns her own efforts toward defense as the various toy soldiers, candy catapults, and other enemy artillery begin firing back. She's singularly quite efficient at handling that kind of defense, picking larger projectiles out of the air and tossing them aside - or in the case of one large fruitcake, back toward its launcher. Smaller ones fired en masse, like the barrage of machine gun candy corn, she handles collectively, raising a hand to meet with a telekinetic barrier.

"Well, if we managed to extend cultural tolerance to /Vampires/ for your wedding, I suppose negotiating with our own dopplegangers should be a breeze, right?" she echoes back at Jubilee. "Sure, if you know any kind of way out of here... we just want to go home. Maybe we can help each other."
Stella Roundtree      Stella is not great at the whole team bit, and the voice in her head is eerie. But the murderous leftovers are approaching fast, particularly the ninja star- which she didn't even register until it whipped by. And then it's back in motion, faster and just as sharp! It manages to sputter through one of the hulking leftover monstrosities, but gets stuck in another.
     Tabby! Or anyone who can throw things that explode! Mind tossing one my way?!" she yells. One of the leftovers, now down an arm, gets robbed as Stella picks up its fallen candycane machete. Hey, it's a start! As her attacker rush at her, she pushes back, the air rippling and attempting to slow them, to start pushing them into one gelatinous mess.
Rogue Rogue flies up to the hockey train and punches the mask at the front of it. She then sweeps out of the way of the saw blades, and tries to rip one of them off of the side of the train's body! With a sweep of the new weapon she tries to use it against the choo choo to make it die die.

A glance back in Jubilee and Nori's direction has her smiling. "Awww, look at them embracing on the battlefield. Young love." She notes before focusing again.

Saw throw!

Rogue chucks the saw at the train, then flies up along side it to try and shove shoulder it off its tracks and on to its side!
James Proudstar James Proudstar anchors the tank line. Keeping the majority of the big bads close starting by using one goblin to beat the rest into submission ripping through goblins and turkeys, taking candy canes and turning them back on the assaulters. Grabbing a fruitcake and firing back at a nutcracker with the force of a bullet. Tying posses of goblins into knots and tossing them aside. The puddle of enemies at his feet starts to grow. He moves easily in the fray a kinetic ballet of destruction from one enemy to the next. Attacking with fists and weapons, adapting from melee to range as the opportunity arises or the need presents.
Tabitha Smith They got up, and they're trudging away her name in the dirt over the midget childred and Gingernators. Tabby braces for candy corn buckshot but it doesn't come as Jean gets her TK on and Tabby is less squished and shot and bleeding than she already is as the holes in her goodie and jeans show.

When Stella calls out for a bomb, the blonde obbliges. Single bomb this time and it's the size of a volleyball. "Get cover Stella. I'm going extra blasty!" she states and streams the ball of plasma at the woman's attacker to explode very effectively. Loud and forcefull. And probably enough to destroy a mid size sedan.

WHich leaves the Gingerbread Cyborgs for more blasting Luckily all that training paid off and she can start guiding similar sized bombs at her robot assailants. "This is a good argument for shoplifting!" she states as a bomb for each Gingernator hits. And soon explodes sending hot plasma through the metal endoskeletons. Of course while Tabby is not going to run out of steam soon, she is still clearly winded.
Jubilation Lee     "Nori...it's okay," Jubilation replies. "...They're just, like, metal gloves. Unless you're about to fuck up Inspector Gadget, you don't need them..." Joking aside, her expression is one of admiration. Can Noriko Ashida exist without her gauntlets? Maybe, maybe not, but how about that Inspector Gadget reference?

    "There's a lesson in that... Um, Jean..." Jubilee shouts back in Jean's direction, turning just a little to make brief eye contact with her. As newly certified, bonafide vampire royalty, it seemed right to be on a first name basis! "We're just like you. Only... like... dead. And hotter." Pause. "...Or way, way, way uglier." Vampires seem to come in two varieties, don't they? They're either a metaphor for sex or so gross that you can never think about it again.

    Jubilation Lee, the vampire Duchess, manages to find a brief moment to take stock of the hellscape of bodies that Tabitha Smith has laid out. She signed her name and everything. There are some lows that even the forces of darkness won't stoop.... Yikes.

    Jubilation turns and presses both hands against Noriko's forearms. "I got you, Nori," she whispers. "If you need to, just let it out into me. I can't get dead-er."
Kitty Pryde Mojo's cameras zoom in, trying to cover the images of the brunette mutant getting cut down by chainsaw wielding turkeys. But all those wings and big feathery tailes block the camera angles.

Then Rogue zooms through their frame, heading on a collision course with the hockey train. The cameras turn to follow her attack, watching the wheel get ripped away and used to bludgeon the locomotive!

Finally they pan back over to their original subject. The trio or turkeys are no longer moving. They lie on the ground, while Kitty stands on top of one, one of their chainsaws held in both hands. Most impressively, the turkeys have lost their feathers and look like something you'd see in the deli section of a supermarket. If far more sliced up like someone practiced carving them before they were cooked.

Kitty wipes turkey guts from her face and winces as it's in her hair. "So doing a black forest ham next year," she groans, before looking about at how her teammates are doing.

<<Who needs help!?>> she sends out via Jean, if possible.
Monet St. Croix The X-Babies don't seem particularly phased by them trying to be killed. The Baby version of Jean would go, "We jes gotta get the show cacneled! There's a big button fer it!" Show.. Canceled..
    Jean goes to make the fruitcake go RETURN TO SENDER as it would hurl back through the air, going to mash hard over and send the bears that had been manning it flattening!
    Then coming up through the air would be.. Santa. Or at least -a- Santa. Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath. Like a fat disgruntled.. Yuletide Rambo.
    ?MERRY MOJOMAS TO ALL! NOW YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Advancing on Jean, going to fire his shotgun loaded with LEGO SHRAPNEL over at her to no real effect given she was up in the air, of course.
    Stella had ideas. Explosions, throwing things.. She definitely would fit in over with the chaos and nonsense of things! The counter-candy fire would tear great, gaping holes in the enemy ranks. Like what happened to sweaters grandma had made and that everyone insisted you had to wear to show how appreciative you were of it!
    It's Rogue vs the Tank Engine as the saw would go through it! Then Rogue goes to throw the choo-choo off the tracks as it's going to smash along to the side and erupt, sawblades cutting through things.. Revealing a somewhat portly looking elderly janitor with a bottle of hootch and a large mustache, and almost y ellow'ish skin. He would have a hat which read -NET EXPRESS- on it. He would look at them, shrug, and go, "I'm on smoke break."
    The X-Babies would cheer, "Yay!" Going to do a series of flips over and acrobatics. "That way!" One of them would point up and over towards the giant holographic image in the air of 'TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES'.
    James Proudstar seems to have gotten past the stage of confusion and has gone to the 'kicking ass'phase of things. Somehow along the way having gotten a bandoiler, headband, and sunglasses. Explosives festooned over his body, a huge oversized combat knife.. Perhaps to his confusion or merely acceptable that this was the way things worked in the world, leaving carnage, slaughter, and leftovers behind him. A vastly oversized uzi in his other hand as if intended for dual wielding with the knife
    Passing over by Tabby as she gets read to SEND US THE BOMB is a small looking pink'ish furry looking thing wearing a punk outfit and a large biker color festooned in spikes. He would cackle at her, "Go Baiii Baii!" Right as the explosion would blast up in the air and detonate over in a cascading series of eruptions! Clearing the area for them to go up if they wished to!
    Kitty has meanwhile stuffed the turkey. And it did not like it. Plucked free corpses would litter the ground, scrambled over with gravy based blood everywhere. Kitty hving a moment as if where she might sheathe a katana over by her side as the halo of the sun would go down.
    Stupid movie based physics.
Noriko Ashida "They aren't just metal gloves, they're like power gloves."  Noriko immediately regrets the words that came out of her mouth.  She could make them sound more lame and they already look so bulky and lame.  When she catches the look on Jubilation's face though, she grins, her defenses melting away.

Vampires being gross /also/ seems like a metaphor for sex...that you never can think about again.

"It's okay.  Jean can knock me out if she has to," Noriko shares with Jubes as the girl is shouting to everything and its mother.  She looks over Jubes' shoulder and then just as she's about to pull away, Jubes turns.  "Okay but, okay."  She'll just let Jubes think everything is fine.  "These kids are fucking weird."  She doesn't address them directly.  Juice boxes.  Jubes is surrounded by juice boxes.  One of them tries to come at Nori from behind and she whips around to hold it at bay by palming its head.  "Jubes!"
Rogue Rogue breathes a sigh of relief as she pushes the train over.

She spies the janitor with the bottle of hooch then...

Swoop. Boots on the ground.

"Let me have'a swig'a that."

And soon, Rogue is walking with the janitor and sipping from the bottle. "Ugh, this is swill."

She says, handing it back to him.
Jean Grey "There are certainly arguments for and against fundamental universal tolerance and the boundaries of cultural relativism between ourselves and creatures that in the large part seem to see us as FOOD," Jean shouts back at Jubilee. "But at the moment I think we have some other worries. So... let's put a pin in that one!" What, the battlefield ISN'T a good place for a roundtable on supernatural identity?

In the meanwhile, the psychic continues to modulate her invisible defenses, catching a stray lego here, some other bizarre projectile there, and generally mostly focusing on not getting injured while she turns her low-skimming flight in the direction their apparent saviors suggest. Who knows if it's not some kind of trick, but it isn't as if their situation isn't rather horrible already. If Mojo can do whatever he wants to them, what's the harm im playing along?

<<Let's move. Supposedly these kids have an out. Just keep on your toes.> Her plan is to follow! <Rogue! C'mon Break time's over!>> Drinking on the job ALREADY! Tsk! <<You're on point in case this goes weird!>>
Stella Roundtree      Throwing things indeed! As candy weapons of all sorts come her way, back they go, as if this 80's VHS had a rewind. And twice as fast! They tear through the big meaty, goopy abominations, leaving giant gaps as the brunette mutant sends their candy deliveries right back to them! And in the silly, only semi-murderous scenario, she's grinning. This is actually fun! And that's as Tabby throws some goodness her way- and Stella amplifies it. The explosion ripples back, leaving so much goopy extra food that the midwesterner almost contemplates making up a tupperware to take home.
James Proudstar James Proudstar stops looking down at himself and then looks deadpan into an unseen camera sighing. "Least it's not cultural appropriation." And with that he's back into the fray unloading the uzi, and using the explosives to make space, if Rogue takes point he watches their back playing demolition man.
Tabitha Smith Gingernators down it seems for now and the pink thing ovehead seems to blast just high enough that Tabby and anone near here might be fine though the blonde does duck and wince as she holds her head. Fire and heat might not be a problem but blast physics can be.

<<There's a hole up there! Jean if you gimme a boost you are back off the you suck list?>> she calls out over the mind link as she looks up at the potential exit!

The blonde does seem to look up at the blasted hole and down at the ground and back and forth like she's doing math in her head. The scrunching of brow meaning this is not the sort of skill she is good at manually doing. But there's folks around that might not appreciate a grenade jump right this second.
Jubilation Lee     "Are you forgetting, JEAN, that I /am/ one of those 'creatures' ?!" Jubilation shoots back. "Don't believe everything you see in the movies!" Well, actually, it's probably a good idea to believe at least /some/ of it. All of it. Okay, so, vampires are bad news. But, well, that's a discussion for another time.

    "I like them," Jubilation insists, praising the speedster's gauntlets. Granted, she's usually enthusiastic about unfastening them and throwing them as far as she can, but still! These two are acting like they're on some kind of honeymoon or something even though reality is melting into visions of gingerbread men, baby versions of themselves, and a drunken Santa. "Merry Mojamas?" Jubilee shouts in retaliation. "I'm starting to see a pattern. Does anyone else see a pattern?"

    Noriko's point about these kids and how weird they are draws out some confusion from Jubes. "Uh, yeah, I guess they're weird... I mean, they're 'born'... which is dumb... And then they get 'older.' What is that?!" she exclaims, both arms extended to fend off any would-be attackers. It seems that Jubilee is having a hard time recalling the basics tenants of life. Being born. Getting older. She used to do those things.

    Once Noriko gets an X-Baby in her palm, Jubes immediately goes Austin Powers on it. "Judo chop!" she announces before sending the teeny tiny Rahne-puppy back to the pound.
Monet St. Croix The janitor was seeingly not phased, ?Yup, that's the stuff I save for when there's a real clogged up pipe. Does wonders. Makes th' days pass real easy.? He would accept it back from Rogue after a moment, going to give her a wave and checking his watch. ?Time fer mah drink break.? Putting the hootch away and taking out a cigarette.
    As Tabitha would point up, there was in fact a giant hole up in the sky right where the hologram had been! And a rising platform would ever so conveniently appear for the group to take on. The X-Babies clambering on as one of the Santas on the ground would go, "Same Mojo Time, Same Mojo Channel." Rahne letting out a cry of sadness while she would be flung off! "Ah jeasse wanna see the starrs!" WUFF IS SAD. Before going to fall back over as a dismembered corpse.

Rising up, up, and up into the air they would for just a moment if one had to look out of the corner of an eye see a huge looking blonde mullet accompanied by a glowing eye, then nothing but a series of lights leading on and the sound of Mojo..
    "The audience loves romance! We should have them die last!"
    Major Domo's voice going, "One of the lovers is already dead, your heinousness."
    "Then we can kill her.. To undeath!" "She's already that way Sir."
    "Dammit! The audience is hooked on those things and loves the aspect of it! It's not even sweeps week so I can't even off her out of nowhere as a SHOCK and AWE like I was Joss!"
Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde rises up on the platform with the others, following the X-Babies. Kitty eyes them, glancing over at James and going, "I'm so going to get another few months of X-babies comments after this, aren't I?"

She held onto the chainsaw though, and as they reach the top and find Mojo there, Kitty revs the engine. "Do we need to teach you again about doing this with us? Or anyone from Earth? The new season is canceled, Mojo!" she yells over at him. Kitty looks to her teammates, ready to advance with the rest of them.
James Proudstar James Proudstar takes a moment to breath. He takes off the sunglasses and hands them to Tabby, then hands the Uzi to Stella allowing them to resize per the logic of this place. He stands up from an X-baby huddle as the baby New mutants mob Kitty, "Momma Pryde! Momma Pryde!" Jim grins at Kate, "Yeah, Momo! Don't mess with us X-Babies!" He quietly keeps his bandoleir of explosives.
Tabitha Smith Up the blonde woman goes with everyone and in a moment of common sense doesn't actually run ahead of the tankier members of the team. There's a moment of sadness and Mini-Rahne is gone. "I wanted to adopt her!" she pouts and sniffs before moving along.

"I ever get close enough Imma shove a half doesn't bombs down that greasy nasty cockbag's throat. Bet he blows like the Tasmanian Devil!" she states and flashes a couple flames of plasma in and around her baleld up fists.

Sunglasses handed to her she absorbs the plasma and sets the accessory down. "That might have earned a booty call Jim!" she states and drops the shades down on her nose. Now she feels like Tabby.

And the plasma is lighting up again. "We find a door Imma kick the fucker in!" she beams eagerly.
Jean Grey An elevator definitely saves on... telekinesis miles, or whatever one measures that in!

So up, up, up they go. Jean doesn't match Kitty's apparent ferocity where it comes to wordplay, though. If anything, she looks quite exhausted by this whole process. "I would think you'd eventually learn some kind of lesson." She declares aloud. "Can you really keep the ratings up like this, when your shows always fall apart? Maybe try a cooking show. Or some kind of house remodeling thing. I hear those are popular, and you can make them on a small budget. Heck, Netflix gives anyone money these days..."

Suddenly, everyone is a critic!

... or a producer.

Still, the fact that Jean does not arrive spoiling for violence doesn't suggest that she's not prepared to deliver some. She's uh, resting her mind or something, gathering strength as they follow the lights and sounds toward their would-be freedom and/or victim.
Monet St. Croix There's a twisted look from Mojo to Major Domo to the X-Babies then to Kitty Pryde with the machine gun, "Wait!? How did you get up here!?"
    Major Domo would let out a sigh, "It was in the script Sir." He would point down to it where..
    "Then you said you would go all Mel Brooks with it and decided that audiences weren't ready for that sort of thing and redrafted it." Hand pointing at a torn page which read 'Mojo: Wait!? How did you get up here!?' and then cut off and scribbled dialogue.
    Behind them was a lever which read 'FIVE MINUTES UNTIL END OF EPISODE' and a smaller 'SERIES FINALE'.
Stella Roundtree      It's been a very long day and the night has just gotten more interesting. The least experienced person on the field is now holding a very big gun! So prepared. So armed. And a lot of potential with no recoil on her part! "Thank you!" she chirps, "Who am I shootin'?" she asks, "Or what, I think I'm up for either." It's very difficult not to be distracted by the batch of babies mob Kitty.
James Proudstar James Proudstar casually takes the script from Majordomo and hands him the bandoleir of explosives to free his hand as he reviews it, "It's true says so right here." As he points to the line the ring from a grenade pin is clearly visible on his finger.
Jubilation Lee     "Listen... 'audience'...." Jubilee curls her fingers twice to do the appropriate air-quotes to make them all feel like jerks for making positive remarks about her and Nori. "I /know/ you want to see it. But, I'm gonna need a monthly subscription of $9.99 and also it's REALLY. HARD. TO. CANCEL!" Each beat is paired with a kick, punch, elbow in the face of an X-Baby or a Gingerwhatzit or a Menora-ceratops. Whatever happens to get in her face.

    And then, there they are. High above. Marching as a team, heading in just in time to bear witness to the whole thing going Mel Brooks on them. "Woah. This is, like, getting weird....er." Suddenly, the reality of the situation -- the fact that it's a television show -- appears in Jubilee's brain. Would this work? Was Mojo this stupid? Is the audience? There's only one way to find out...

    Suddenly, Jubilee turns, as though she's facing an invisible camera. "We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you this important message..." Jubilee begins, trying her absolute best to sound like a newscaster about to interrupt a broadcast. Pause for effect. Pause for effect. "...Reports are in that the Kitty Pryde, the mutant whose best friend is a dragon... Suddenly found an elevator to the broadcast hookup for the whole show...." Jubilee turns her head to see.... Is Mojo going to play along or will he break the tradition of television? The one rule: Walter Cronkite is always right.
Tabitha Smith Tabby makes sure she had plenty of room, any assailant heads and chests exploded in a good old fasioned explosive double tap to make sure they don't get back up. The midget child with a BBzooke gets an extra series of kicks that almost has the blonde lagging behind but she soon jobs back up to stay with the party.

You never split the party!

And once everyone else is making their threats even Tabby chimes in with her vengeful sadistic streak engaged. She's a mess of bruises cuts and scorched torn clothes.

She maybe has a grudge.

"I bet I would write my name with my lights all across that stomach and not run out of space, And my damn codename too!" Tabitha states with a grin as she condenses the flames in her hands to smaller streams and slowly works them towards Mojo's stomach. A wicked grin on her lips as she looks down and over the top of her sunglasses. There's a turn of her head to smirk at the other mutants but she keeps on threatening to burn the greasy produder.

"Or will the whole oily mess of Mojo go up like a walking barbecue grill? Lets find out together."

The flame inches and inches closer.

"For science!"
Kitty Pryde The cameras zoom in on the spray of fire from Tabitha, catching all the carnage. Because that's what drives ratings. Another camera pans across and zooms in as James Proudstar moves forward to clarify the script. At home viewers who spot the grenade pin on his finger point it out to their friends.

Jubilee is ready for her close up! The camera makes love to her, zooming way in on the pale Asian's features as she delivers the update. Immediately after the camera swings about as if looking for the mutant in question.

It finally finds her, Kitty Pryde standing over at a nearby wall with some kind of equipment panel. She revs the chainsaw and cuts the hinges off, swinging it open to reveal what look like a series of gigantic power cables.

"No, not those!" Mojo screams, frantically stabbing buttons.

"Ahem. It's in the script," Major Domo says with a sad shake of his head.

Kitty grins and the chainsaw cuts through the bundle of power cables. The lights start to go first, emergency lights illuminating the scene immediately. The picture jumps, goes staticky, and then stabilizes on the next cut. "NO!" Mojo shouts as he reads the script, then looks over at the bandolier of explosives that James Proudstar handed over.

The chainsaw roars again and the picture cuts out, leaving only a black screen, and the audio, which catches the start of an explosion before going offline.