Owner Pose
Madison Evans     Staying at home and moping had not appealed to Madison. In fact - being in Happy Harbor at all hadn't appealed, so she got her mother's reluctant permission to go visit Titan Tower again instead. "I have lots of friends there, mom. I'll be okay. I'll be //fine,//" was the teen's explination.
    But once there - she finds herself completely incapable of sitting still - so while Star Wars Rebels plays on the Titan's big screen, the young Jedi is in the kitchen area, staring at a recipe on her phone, and digging around in cupboards. There's flour dusted around on the counter, some sugar spilled on the floor, and large bowl with a thick, chocolatey looking batter of some kind. "No, it looks like I need to-" She turns, trying to get something she's forgotten out of the cupboards, but she ends up knocking the glass bowl, which slides off the counter, and onto the floor where it shatters, and splatters thick batter on the floor, and cupboard doors, and one young Jedi.
    "DAMNIT!" The teen exclaims, before clapping both hands over her mouth, tears springing to her eyes.
Terry O'Neil Terry O'Neil, in his human guise, walks out into the kitchen area, looking a mite hung over. Gar was taking custody of the Cheshire, in the hopes that Terry's reaction to so much Order would subside. It sort of has, but he's still somewhat hung over from the experience altogether... in a slightly chill, relaxed way.

He blinks at the shattered bowl and the batter, and then up at Maddie with her tears, and says:

"Oh Maddie... Maddie no, it's ok... here, let me help you clean up!" he quickly makes his way to grab cleaning supplies, "It'll clean up in no time and then we can bake something together, would you like that?"
Madison Evans     The teen nods her head, with her hands still clamped over her mouth, and tears welling out of her eyes and down her cheeks. It takes her a moment before she moves to help, pulling out a trash can, and a dust pan. "We should, umm... Push all the stuff into hear because of the shattered glass. I don't want you to get cut. ...I'm sorry about the bowl," she says in a subdued voice.
    It's not the sort of voice anyone who knew Madison would expect to come out of the teen.
Terry O'Neil "Oh honey don't you worry about that raggedy bowl, I've dented Caitlin's gourmet cookwear and she didn't even make a fuss, nobody's going to care about a bowl." He grabs a broom, "Let's just sweep the glass into one spot- It'd be easier if I could just Rabbit Hole it but Gar has the Cat tonight, so we're going to have to do teamwork, right?"

The memories of earlier start coming back to him now. He was operating in much of a daze, so... details are vague, since he went to bed as soon as he dropped the kids off. After accidentally Rabbit Holing to five different other locations.

"I've got some lemonade in the fridge, why don't you sit down and I'll bring you some of it, then we can take a breather and we can make a cake or something?" He says, going for the fridge.
Madison Evans     Madison nods in response to Terry's reassurances, as she works with him to get all the glass cleaned up, and the ruined batter tossed into to garbage as well. She uses a sponge to wipe down the door of the cabnets, wiping her eyes ont he back of her hand - and then washes her hands in the sink.
    "I uhh - I think I saw some fresh mint in the fridge," she remarks. "We could bash some up and add it to the lemonade?" she suggests - taking a pestle out of a mortar on the counter, and getting out a few sprigs of mist to bruise, while she leaves Terry to get the cups. She drops one into each glass, and picks up her filled cup to take to the couch, and sip, while Star Wars Rebels continues to play - and Hera tries to pull of some mad piloting to escape some TIE fighters.
Terry O'Neil "That's an excellent idea," Terry says. As Madison prepares the mint, he grabs the glasses, the pitchers, and ice. After setting it up he lets her add the mint and pulls up seats for both of them.

"I was thinking we could make profiteroles. Have you ever had them? They're delicious. Choux pastry and chocolate...." he says, making a mental note of ingredients as he sits himself down.

He is the cat so often that he checks himself and realizes he doesn't have to sit 'side saddle' on the stool to make room for the tail. He doesn't have one right now. He waits for Maddie to drink her lemonade as he takes very short sips of it.
Madison Evans     "I've done choux before," Madison confirms. "Mom really likes to cook - so we do a lot of cooking together. And most of it's healthy but- whatever treats we do have, we make ourselves. And- umm, if you add grated cheese to the choux you can make really nice little cheese puff bread things, too."
    She sips at her lemonade, her tone and demeanor both more subdued than usual, as she still blinks away the occassional tear. She tries to keep her mind on cooking, and recipes, rather than letting herself think about-
    "What if we made a croquembouche? I've never done one of those, and I bet everyone would be real impressed if we pulled it off."
Terry O'Neil "That is an excellent idea- and Gar not being in the tower right now, they might actually last long enough for everybody to get at least one," Terry says with a smile, "Well, let's see... eggs, corn starch, kosher salt..." he sips the last of his lemonade and stands up to gather the ingredients, and sets the oven to pre-heat for 400f, and sets about to lay the bowls on the counter, and the mixer.

"You know, baking alone is always a little intimidating, kind of overwhelming," he says, as he brings out the butter, salt and the sugar so Maddie can put them to boil with water on one of the pots. "Sometimes you drop stuff and you feel like the worst. But when you've got more than one person, things are easier, you know? Suddenly the empty space shrinks by half. Confidence increases. Especially when you're wearing one of these cute numbers."

He puts on his apron, which reads "Damnit Rae It's NOT A Croissant!" (custom made, why did you ask?) and he offers her one that reads "Master Chef Apprentice" with a cartoon cat carrying a saucepan.
Madison Evans     Madison takes the offered apron with a small smile, slipping the strap over her head, and tying it behind her back. "It is more fun cooking with someone else," she agrees, as she pulls up a recipe, and starts weighing things, to put into the pot, with a wooden spoon to mix it. "Plus, then you don't have to do all the washing up by yourself. Washing up by yourself is the worst - especially for a project //this// big."
    She's soon stirring the mixture in the pot vigorously, as she tries to cook it all to the correct thickness. It has to start coming together and pulling away from the pot...
Terry O'Neil While Maddie stirs the mixture, Terry prepares the electric mixer just a ways down the counter, and sets the eggs out for adding later. "That's starting to get there," the redhead nods, looking over Madison's shoulder, "I could never get the consistency right the first few times I tried. Mom would laugh. You know how she got me to help her with the baking when I was a kid?"

Making sure the baking sheets are prepared so they don't have to run around at the last minute, he continues, "She told me she was a witch and I was helping her prepare spells." He gives a little smirk, "She had my number alright. But, you know, she went for the whole thing. Hat. Dress. Apron. At one point she even had the striped socks? I started looking forward to baking."

He comes back to Madison and offers her a refilled glass of lemonade. "She'd tell me that it was all magical because you could be feeling like anything, and you could let it all out because a witch's kitchen was a secret place, so no-one would hear you. And no matter how rotten you felt, somehow the food still came out great, and it made you feel better. So that was magical."
Madison Evans     "Well, all mom had to tell me was that I'd get to eat whatever we made - //and// lick the bowls. For as protective as she gets - the one thing she never worries about is raw egg." Madison gives Terry a small smile when he brings a fresh glass of lemonade - and she pauses her stirring long enough to take a sip.
    "I guess that last part's pretty true. I- don't think even a croquembouche is going to make me feel... completely better, though," she admits. She still has a smile on her features - but it's a little forced, and strained.
Terry O'Neil "I don't think anything will, for a while, Maddie," Terry says, leaning against the counter. "I want you to know that you don't need to put up a front around any of us. We know you're feeling awful. Anyone would be." He crosses his arms and glances at the windows, and the world outside. "You know... in the before times, before you ran into us... we thought we had lost Beast Boy. Gar." He thinks for a few seconds, "I won't tell you the details, but it was... horrible. And I did nothing but cry for days, and then I was like a walking shell for several others. And all throughout that time, Donna and Cait and Vic and... yes, even Rae in her own way, they were here for me and listened to me falling apart and were there when I needed them. And they also would go away when I needed them to. That last part is just as important as the first part. Nobody expected me to smile when I didn't feel like it. You know what I'm saying?"
Madison Evans     Madison's gaze locks onto Terry - she even forgets to stir for a while as she listens, and offers a nod in response, the forced smile disappearing off her features. "Yeah," she agrees. "Yeah, I think I do. I didn't know anything like that had happe- Oh shoot!" She hastily starts stirring again, looking down at her dough, which seems suitably thickened now - and thankfully not burned. She turns it out into the mixer bowl, before putting the pot in the sink, and turning off the stove.
    "It's not like I was really close to the Headmistress or anything," she remarks quietly. "But she was nice. And it was... awful. It was just awful."
Terry O'Neil "I know," Terry says, placing a hand on Madison's shoulder while the mixer starts doing its thing. They will need to wait until the mixture stops steaming before they can move on to the next step: adding the eggs. "I never met her personally but I always heard she was a good woman. I think Colette suggested I show up there for one of their career days... was it Colette?" No, it was definitely not Colette. Colette would never encourage Terry to go near any learning environment in case he put ideas into the minds of the students that putting on a costume and punching people was a perfectly acceptable occupation.

"And it's ok to talk about it. You don't want to bottle it up. It's not healthy- and she wouldn't want you to hurt yourself by letting that build up inside of you, you know?"

And then he tilts his head to the side, "And it's perfectly okay to ask for a hug and have a cry."
Madison Evans     "I tried to help," Madison explains in a quiet voice. "But I couldn't- it didn't do any good," she admits, the tears starting to streak down her cheeks. "I couldn't do anything. What good is being a Jedi if you can't- I'm supposed to help people!" That's all the teen gets out, before the tears start in earnest, and she throws herself into Terry's arms, crying.
Terry O'Neil Terry returns the hug and does that little rocking side-to-side motion, one hand patting her hair. "I know... I know." Doesn't he. They might have saved the Earth from several alien invasions, but there were still casualties. "You just let it out. Don't worry about being loud." He personally preferred to bite down on a pillow and cry because otherwise he got the horrible hiccups afterwards if he didn't. He lets Maddie feel what she needs to feel, not standing in the way of her emotions and not saying anything. Right now is not the time for words, but to let that primal pain out. She saw something terrible she shouldn't have seen, and it's all Terry can do to resist the urge of asking Gar for the Cheshire back, grabbing the Regalia and knocking on a certain deity's door. But- crying Jedi. You can't abandon crying Jedi.
Madison Evans     Madison continues to cling to Terry, an utter mess as she sobs into his apron. There are no words. How can you get words out past sobs like that? Little by little, though, the tears begin to slow - the hot dough in the stand mixer cooled, and ready for the addition of eggs to make the choux pastry ready. On the counter, a pair of glasses are filled with ice, bruised mint, and lemonade - still largely untouched.
Terry O'Neil Once the tears have slowed down, Terry speaks quietly, holding Madison. "I know we want to help everybody... but the hardest truth about doing what we do is that we can't save everybody. We'd like to, and we /try/ to, but sometimes... it's beyond what we can do. Luke couldn't all the time. Even Superman can't save everybody. And... you know something, Maddie?"

Terry pats her head lightly, "Nobody is ever going to think of you any less if you decide that's something you don't want in your life. I mean... think about it. The Titans disbanded after Doomsday claimed two of them, and most of them didn't do anything in the super-front for years until they got back together. It's perfectly okay if you need to walk away and take care of yourself. And then maybe come back later... and if you decide you don't want to come back to that life, that's okay, too. There are many ways in which you can be a Jedi- after all, not all Jedi were fighters, you know? Remember Jocasta?"
Kian     Kian does not look terribly well rested, primarily thanks to Raven having one of her special moments.  At least he hadn't actually been /in/ his bed when the Great Defenestration happened... but he was heading that way.
    So there are multiple factors behind the zig-zag path he takes as he drops out of the flyers' shaft and touches down with a yawn and a light thump.  The scent of chocolate draws him closer to the kitchen area.  The sight of eggs ready to be sacrificed to Terran cuisine send him veering away, toward the main lounge and the couch.
    And the sight of Terry comforting Madison draws him back, damn the eggs.
    He does avert his gaze from those.
    He glances first at Terry, then at Madison, and asks her the inevitable, "What happened?  Are you all right?"
Madison Evans     "The librarian?" Madison asks simply, as she starts to pull away, wiping at her eyes again with the back of her hand. She glances towards Kian for a moment, but says something to Terry first, before addressing his question. "I want to fight. I- I want to figure out what I could've done, that wouldda made a difference. I want to be //ready// if it happens again. I don't want to feel helpless like that again. Not //ever.// 'cuz it was awful."
    Only with that said does she direct towards Kian, "My Headmistress got killed. Doctor MacIntyre, from Happy Harbor. We didn't even get to go into the pyramids."
    And she'd been looking forward to that all trip!
    Now she never wants to see them again.
Terry O'Neil "You can't blame yourself, Maddie- sometimes there's nothing we could have done. Don't think like that... I understand why you would, and trust me, I /know/ the feeling of being helpless... I had to sit by and watch while people /much/ stronger than me went head-to-head with the Archangel Michael- and he killed people. He almost unmade me, if it hadn't been for a little help from Ma'at..."

He exhales and gives Maddie a squeeze, "I don't have all the answers, but the one thing I /do/ know is that you can't blame yourself."

He glances over at Kian and extends one of his hands to reach out to him to embrace him if he needs it, now that Madison has pulled away. He knows Kian's past with Happy Harbor and the role the Headmistress played in it. The woman played an important role in several of his friend's lives, and he never met her.
Kian     Kian reacts like he'd been slapped.  When SHIELD released him after determining he was not an alien menace, Happy Harbor and Dr MacIntyre were his next port of call, a place to start learning English and to try to figure out this mad planet.
    It hadn't worked out; in those days, Happy Harbor wanted their students to pretend they were normal, and with a few meters of wings hanging from his back, that just wasn't possible for the birdman.  That led to his first meeting with Gar, and with Terry, and with moving into the Tower and eventually somehow or another becoming a Titan without even really knowing what one *was*.
    It's hard to say that was directly her doing, but she recognized that the school was not working for a birdman who couldn't and wouldn't hide who he was.  And she was the first person to offer him a home, even though she didn't owe him one in any way.
    "I... don't doubt you," Kian says hoarsely, his mouth suddenly dry, "but I find it hard to imagine how.  She didn't seem one who could easily be...."  He can't quite finish the sentence, but it's probably obvious what he means.
    Kian of course takes Terry's hand. The part-time cat has an immediate sense of sadness and loss from the birdman... and the sense that Kian is trying very hard to shield his /tenar/ from the full impact of it.
Madison Evans     "I just want to be ready. I just want to be... better. I want to know more. Maybe if I'd had my lightsaber, or maybe- I don't know. Maybe I could've done something, or maybe I couldn't have, but I wanna know more," the girl insists. Her voice is subdued - but still somehow firm, and insistent.
    She looks towards Kian, her expression uncertain. "Umm, she was fighting someone real strong. Someone that flew, and didn't seem to- nothing anyone threw at her seemed to hurt her. And she- she stabbed Doctor MacIntyre in the chest." She can still remember all the blood. She squeezes her eyes shut, but that doesn't help, so she says hastily instead, "We should add the eggs! I'll, uhh... I think I remmber how to do this part."
     She picks up the first of the eggs.
Terry O'Neil And it's time for Terry to hug Kian. One: for comfort, and two: to put his mind off the eggs. But mostly for Comfort. As he pulls the bird-man closer, he says:

"Knowing more and being better are good goals..." He pauses. He realizes that right now, it is not the time to insist. You don't argue with those who are grieving. Focus, instead, on the now, and what can be done right now. "You know exactly what to do," he says as she begins to add the eggs.

He remembers what he was like when they thought Gar was dead. How patient and kind everybody had been. How Kian simply let him explode when he needed to. And collapse when he needed to. Now Kian had been struck as well, so the young man rests his cheek against Kian and does his best to embrace him. He wishes Donna were here... Donna would know the right thing to say.
Kian     When Madison reaches for the eggs, Kian automatically both closes his eyes and turns his head away.  He can only apologize for the wave of nausea that will certainly hit Terry -- which he does, mentally, even as he settles in against his /tenar/, breathing hard but not crying.
    At least not yet.
    Among his people, there is rarely regret for things unsaid to those who have gone back to the Cycle.  Among telepaths, generally speaking, everyone knows exactly how their friends and family feel about them.  There's no wishing they'd said "I love you" one more time to a parent or grandparent or other loved one -- they just *knew*, and couldn't *help* but know.  It radiated from one to another, shared freely.
    And Kian *had* thanked Morrigan /q'mirith/ for everything she'd done for him, but somehow it didn't feel like enough.
    What the birdman does say, still clinging to Terry, eyes still closed, is: "Madison, if there's anything I can do to help you, please let me know."
    The next time Kian says something to Gar about putting other people's needs before his own, Terry has ammunition.
Madison Evans     Completley unaware of Kian's issue with eggs, Madison starts cracking them in, one by one. He can't see it - but surely he can hear it as each egg hits the counter, and is cracked open. As eat shell is nestled togeether - and tossed into the trash. After a few eggs, she stops the beater, lifting it up to check the dough's consistency - then starts it up again to add more.
    "I, ummm. I don't really know what I need," Madison admits. "Except maybe to not be alone? Or - I don't know. To cook, and play board games, and maybe paint. ...and to learn. I want to start learning a //lot// more."
Terry O'Neil "We can do that," Terry says, fighting down the nausea. He knows how to do that, alright: Deep breathing from the diaphragm, deeep, deep breaths. Do not puke on Kian. Do not. Admittedly, this is bringing up all sorts of memories of that time. Deep breaths.

When he gets to bed tonight, he's going to hug Gar and Kian extra tight.

Deep breaths. Poor Madison. "But one step at a time, and don't... just rush." He briefly ponders asking her if she has someone to talk to. Professionally. But that might be a better question for Madison's mom?

Oh god, he would have to talk to Madison's mom, maybe.

Unless he got his mom to talk to her mom.

Wait. Would those two meeting each other be a good idea at all?

He could ask Harley-

Wait. Was that a good idea?

{/I'm here. I love you/} Terry sends to Kian as he hugs him and tries to distract him from the sound. As much as he can without covering his ears.
Kian     {/I don't doubt that, /tenar'h//,} Kian replies mentally to Terry.  The birdman seems to have no trouble filtering out the sound of eggs being butchered; basically, it's just a matter of ignoring the sounds he doesn't know very well, like thin calcium carbonate shells being shattered against glass or wood or marble or whatever.
    "I don't know what your end of life customs are on Earth," he says simply.  "What is the appropriate way to remember the person, and dispose of the untenanted body?"
Madison Evans     "That's- uhhh. It varies a lot. By cultures. Sometimes bodies are burned. Sometimes they're buried. Sometimes they're buried at sea. I even heard once there's some cultures that- uhhh... cut the body up and leave it outside for the birds to eat." Crack - another egg goes in.
    Her voice is even quieter as she adds, "There isn't a body, though. There wasn't anything left after she... exploded."
    After one more egg, the mixture is right, and she prepares a piping bag to scoop her batter into.
    "But, umm, usually people get together and have a funeral. They share memories, and write messages in a book for the family, and put flowers- well. On the grave usually, but-" Will Doctor MacIntyre even have a grave?
    "...I don't really know what'll happen," she admits softly.
Terry O'Neil "Then we will have our own memorial service for her," Terry says quietly, stroking Kian's hair. "We'll call Colette up and we'll have a moment here, at the top of the tower at sunset. And people who knew her that you want to invite can come and share memories. Independent of what the school may do." He glances at what Maddie is working on, and then he adds, "And we will bake things for the service. And we can have music- I could ask Nick to play something... if we can find out what her favorite music was, I'm sure he could do something." Another idea, "You and I will help with the coordination, Vic can help with the lighting and sound systems, Caitlin will help with the baking. And Colette..." he pauses, "Will drink."
Kian     "Well," Kian remarks, waxing philosphic, "it hardly matters to the body anyway, whatever made her Morrigan isn't in it anymore.  I would say she has returned to the Cycle, and has either unified with the Gods, or is lined up to come back to this world in another body to try again."  He smiles very slightly at Madison.  "I would hope a spirit like hers has attained unity with the Gods... then again, I don't know what Gods are over her and what *Their* rules are.  But if they would rule someone like her unworthy, then they do not seem very godlike to me."
    He nuzzles gently into Terry's cheek.  "I would drink to her memory too.  Fortunately I still have some of Dad's brandy.  The Gods know she's worthy of it."
Madison Evans     "I, uhh... Yeah. I'd go to something like that," Madison agree. "I mean- I'm sure they're already planning something like that - for the school. And mom got a message that there's counselors and everything available at the school but I just-" Tears well up in the girl's eyes again. "It didn't happen at school, but I just- I don't want to be there. I don't- even... really want to be in Happy Harbor," she admits.
    Because it just isn't //right// without Doctor MacIntyre there.
    She rubs the tears away - and sets to work piping even circles of dough, setting the nozzle down on the parchment papers as she pipes. Once a tray is finished, she knocks it once to help even out the shapes - and then uses a wet finger to start patting down the little spikes at the top of each one from withdrawing the tip.
Terry O'Neil "I understand that feeling very well, Maddie," It is not his place to say whether she should be there or not- that's for Madison's mother to argue. "Let's plan the details while we bake, then. Kian, love," he glances at the winged man, "Why don't you fly over and get us a pizza while the croquembouches bake? It's always easiest to plan when eating pizza."

He reaches into his pocket and takes out his wallet, and hands Kian enough cash to cover for the pizza from Giorgio's, "This should be enough plus a good tip for them." Up until recently, Kian was mostly dependent on the Titans, and Terry and Gar's income. Terry jokingly referred to Kian once as a 'sex kitten', but since Kian had absolutely no cultural framework for the term, he merely looked puzzled and suggested that Terry fit that term better, and then Terry had to go and be mortified elsewhere.

But not anymore. Now that Kian had become the chocolate magnate of his people, he was getting a sizable cut from each shipment. Still... old habits died hard.

"Meanwhile, I'll help Maddie with the rest of the 'bouches."
Kian     "Call them and place the order so that it's ready by the time I get there -- or at least not long after," Kian says, and waves off the offered money.  "And I will pay for it, since I finally *can*.  Just make sure you order one of my favorite: pineapple, green pepper and onion."
    At least anchovies weren't involved.  Take your victories where you can.
    Terry gets a kiss on the cheek, and Madison a hug.  "Whatever the school decides to do, will you let me know, Madison /tavar'h/?  For everything she did for me, I need to be there to remember her."
    With a flick of his wings, he's off up the open shaft, and on his way to Giorgio's.
Madison Evans     The hug is a little unexpected - she doesn't know Kian as well as some of the other Titans, but Madison offers a nod in response. "Yeah, sure. I mean - I'm sure I'll get emails and stuff, and my mom too, obviously." She gives the birdman a small smile, before turning her attention back to the second tray of choux pastries.
    "I don't suppose that place has a figgy piggy? There was a pizza place in California with pork and figs on a pizza and it was just- so good." There's a brief pause before she asks Terry, "What's 'tavar'h'?"