View source for 9624/Ich will kein Engel sein

{{Log Header
|Date of Scene=2022/01/14
|Location=Bullpen - Daily Planet Building
|Synopsis=And there, assembled on the Earth conspire
the cavalry of light and fire,
the loving cruelties of air
and winged garroters of care
that weep but do not cry,
that cease but do not die,
facsimile of man in all
but grace, for once upon the fall
our kind a better path did trace
when, to the world, it turned its face
and turned its back, and left behind
that empty edifice where time
is not, and therefore changes naught.
'twas not a fall but an ascent,
and they contemn irreverent
the hand that once had touched the flame
that for themselves they would have claimed.
The screaming hordes rain from above,
there's naught so cruel: an angel's love.
|Cast of Characters=339,2924
|pretty=yes
}}
{{Poses
|Poses=:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"Thank you so much for this," the Cheshire Cat says, settling down on the comfortable seat across from Cael's. The interview room, soundproof and cozy, is provided with a mini-fridge and non-alcoholic beverages. <br><br>The camera is set up on a tripod, pointing at both of them, and the illusion of shadows has been applied to Cael, so that features are obscured in a tasteful, cinematic way.<br><br>The Daily Planet saves a /lot/ in post-processing expenses with Terry. <br><br>"So whenever you're ready... we can begin," the Cheshire nods, gesturing towards a little table next to Cael. <br><br>"Whenever you're ready, just press the button on the remote," the camera's remote has been placed on it, within arm's reach, "It'll start the camera. If at any point you need to pause, just hit it again. And if at any point you want to back out of it because it's too painful, it's ok." <br><br>He leans back on his seat and crosses a leg over his knee, "Do you have any questions of me?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Nah, I- I'm good," Cael answers - taking a deep breath in, and letting it out slowly. "I mean - you just want me to tell it? No questions or...?" <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Okay. So maybe she does have a question, after all. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Sitting beside her, prominently wearing his 'Service Dog in Training vest is Bear - his head resting on Cael's knee as she strokes the dog's head slowly, seeking his comfort and reassurance. "We're probably going to have to take a lot of breaks," she admits with a tight smile. Nearby sits her thermos filled with strong, black coffee - it's not quite as comforting as her dog, but it helps. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"So. Well, it all started with a series of murders in Hell's Kitchen - the Papal Killer cases. The victims that were being found on crucifixes, most of them burned to death and mutilated in varying ways. I was consulting with the NYPD on the case." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>Terry nods, his demeanor calm and subdued. He is usually boisterous and loud, so the transformation is distinctive. <br><br>"In your capacity as consultant, what were your initial observations about the nature of the case? Were there any initial indications that pointed towards something more than a serial killer? If you are allowed to disclose that, of course."<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cael lets out a heavy sigh as she considers what she can and cannot say about the case on camera. "There was very little sign of struggle. It was difficult to determine how the killer was successfully... nailing his victims to crosses. That was the most troubling part of it, really - and believe me, there was a lot to be troubled by. But that was the only thing that I, without any magical talents, could point to as non-mundane." That she's willing to admit on camera. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Others with more magical talents found more direct clues, though. They were able to cause script to appear, that was identified as 'enochian' - or what the layman would call 'angelic.' The language of angels. Much of the script turned out to be... essentially a sentence which had been passed on the victim. The crimes the victim had been found guilty of, and the punishment they'd receieved. ...a death sentence, for shoplifting. And it wasn't a painless death." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Even with the shadows over her face, it's clear her gaze drops down to the dog in her lap, as she scratches at the creatures eats. "Then new script appeared, like it was being written right then. The translation was, 'Perhaps one of you is fit to be judged by my hand.' Angelic threats." Bitterness colors her voice, as her fingers tighten on the dog's fur. Bear nudges at Cael encouragingly, letting out a quiet whine. <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"This is probably confidential, so feel free to say so if it is." Terry tilts his head, "Do you remember what crimes were alleged against the victims, that the angels saw fit to act as judge, jury and executioners on?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"It varied. Shoplifting, bearing false witness - one of the victims was lying about their neighbors to the police. But some of the victims were rapists, and murderers." Cael falls silent for a moment before she adds, "I can say with confidence, though, that I wouldn't wish this death on anyone. It's the very definition of cruel and unusual." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Petting at Bear's head to adds, "My own crimes include breaking and entering, grand theft auto... and accessory to murder. But my crimes have already been dealt with by the judicial system," she explains simply, without providing any further details. <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>The Cheshire cat presses his lips tight and takes in a very slow breath. Once Cael has answered, he lets silence reign for five seconds, and he asks: "Once the Enochian script had been decyphered, how did the investigation proceed? At which point did you... have your own encounter?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"There was a gap in the victims. They were being found about once every three days - but there was a six day span between two of them," Cael explains. "A large part of the investigation focused on the attempt to find that missing victim, and to try to find any pattern to the victims - to try to predict who would be targeted next. We were trying to find a way to lay a trap for this killer who seemed to be... an angel. It seemed ridiculous at the time, but- less so now." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She takes a deep, shakey breath in before she explains, "It was three days after that victim, the shoplifter, the tenth victim, that the missing victim was found. And it was just about the same time that Dective Pezzini was investigating the sight that I was... taken. I'd been asleep in my own room, and I woke up somewhere else. A sealed, wooden room. No doors, no windows, no hatches in the ceiling or the floor. No way in, no way out. It had a cot - where I woke up - a pair of chairs, and these little bowls on the floor - filled a warm, golden glow." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>The feline keeps his eyes on Cael, trying to anticipate signs of distress. Otherwise, he lets her take her own time, speak at her own pace. After another few seconds of silence, he asks, "Were you left alone in this room for a long time?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"No," Cael answers. Her voice is soft, and laced with the pain of the memory. "I wasn't alone. A man was there. "He'd- this man had summoned the angel. He'd wanted the power to protect his friends and family, and //fix// what was wrong with the world, and the angel began possessing him. Taking control of his body when he slept so he could go out into the world and cleanse it of evil, sinful people. And he meant me to be next." Her next breath is so uneven it's almost a sob, and after a few gasping breaths, she settles for simply holding her breath as she tries to regain control, tears trickling down her cheeks. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;The dog beside her jumps up so his paws are on her lap, licking at her face and trying to provide comfort as she continues to stroke him. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But still Cael makes no attempt to stop the tape. She wants to get this //done//. <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>Terry nods slowly, looking at Cael with quiet admiration. He can't even begin to fathom what she has lived through- he was mortally wounded once, but it was a straightforward wound. Not torture. Not sadism. Gar, perhaps, who was almost mauled to death by his evil doppelganger, was closest to perhaps knowing it in the flesh.<br><br>"Take your time," he says softly, still as a sphinx. He doesn't offer to stop the recording, it's in her control- the entire interview is, he's made sure of that. "What did he do?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cael wraps her arms around the dog, hugging tightly to him as she simply breathes, and brings herself back under control. It takes time, but when she's ready, she straightens again, wiping at her eyes, and sipping her coffee. After another deep, slow breath she finally continues the tale. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"He spoke with a calm, gentle voice. His eyes... glowed, a golden molten pool. He spoke of love, and peace, and... attonement. He said it would all go easier if I simply submitted. If I took a seat, and participated in my own judgement. If I accepted my fate." She lets out a humorless laugh. "What a fucking prick." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She clears her throat before she adds, "I tried to find a way out - but there wasn't any. I tried to run. Agent Sims had made me a charm to protect me, we'd... concluded that the angel was able to affect the minds of his victims, so he made something that would reflect back the angel's attempts to influence me - but it wasn't meant to last. I was just supposed to give me a chance to run - and I couldn't." For a moment, it seems like she might relapse into tears, but another lick from the pup in her lap seems to help settle her. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"I decided I would have to fight. That my only option was to try to kill this man who was the angel's host. I went towards the chair, lured the man in towards me... And I swung it at him. It was the only weapon I had - but it froze midswing, like I'd hit a solid wall. The chair disappeared, and reformed again behind me, and I was told to sit. And when I wouldn't... I was lifted in the air. Like I was gripped by a powerful, invisible hand. I couldn't move. I could bareful breathe. He found the charm around my neck, and took it... and burned it." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"And he passed judgement on you..." Terry asks quietly. It was amazing, how much rage could lurk under the surface. He found his owm emotions bubbling right under the skin. But he can't lose his composure. His own expression is muted but sincere. Don't pull attention away, had been Lois' lesson. Interviewers who betrayed too much emotion on camera made the story about themselves, in the eyes of the public. They might not mean it, but the public will notice it. Will remember it. 'This isn't your story, O'Neil, remember that. Don't steal theirs.'<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Yeah," Cael confirms quietly. "He- he got into my head. He made me feel love, like you've never felt before. Unconditional love, and acceptance - but with sadness. Disappointment. And... hope. Hope that I could- be improved. Purified. Saved. It was heady. It was... addictive. A part of me wants that feeling back. I'd do anything for that feeling, to erase that disappointment, to be worthy of that love, to- It was //sick,//" she says fiercely, letting out another gasping breath, and having to wipe at her eyes again. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"He asked me to sit. I... relived all my crimes, remembered them all. And as I did my hands, and then my feet, began to blister and burn and it was agony and ecstacy at the same time. I welcomed it. I deserved it. I wanted it, like I'd never wanted anything." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>'I will decidedly never accept any god that is capable of such monstrousness,' he had said to Caitlin at the tent. Hearing Cael's account, the only thing that Terry would add to that statement is 'and I fucking mean it.'<br><br>The Cheshire cat nods, at this point, it is better to let Cael decide what to share. She shouldn't be rushed- he is there, merely listening now.<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"As I remembered the last of my crimes... he wrote my sentence, and I knew it. I understood it. It was just... there in my mind, and I was eager to- to unburden myself. To be free. A cross appeared, and he offered me a hammer and nails, and I took them. Went to the cross and hammered the nails through my calves - not my ankles. I held the nail on my forearm, so he could hammer it in. One more nail, and it'd be done. He'd take my hands and feet, and I'd have a heart attack for each of- of the people I'd helped kill. And then I'd be free. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"...that's when Sims and Pezzini arrived. If they'd been minutes later... Well, we wouldn't be having this conversation." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;As the dog whines and nudges at her, she scritches at him some more murmuring, "I'm okay, Bear. I got this." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;One last deep, slow breath before she explains, "I was happy to see them. Not because I wanted them to rescue me - because I wanted them to see. To understand how wrong we were, and how glorious it all was. When they tried to stop it - tried to stop me from being freed, I was horrified. The angel ordered me to help defend it. ...I tore out the nails, and attacked Sims. I drove one of the nails through his shoulder and into a wall - but that's when they others managed to capture to angel to bind it, and the influence it had on me was gone, and all I could feel was the pain, and the... ecstacy was gone and I just... collapsed." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>The pain must have been excruciating. Agonizing. His claws dig into his armrest, just slightly. But his hands barely move, so it's not that noticeable. He lets more moments of silence pass, and he asks a question- seemingly a superfluous one, although still related, but one to perhaps help pull the mental camera back and create some psychological distance from the reliving of the memories- a futile thing, perhaps, but ... <br><br>"Did you ever learn the name of the angel? Did it have a name?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Sims got its name," Cael offers quietly. "The Archangel Michael, Commander of the Hosts, General of the Army of Heaven, Revelator, Slayer of the Great Dragon, and the Sword of God." The bitterness in her voice is palpable "Fucking... Michael. Dooming people one by one isn't enough for him, now he wants to destroy reality. He's a monster if ever there was one." She wipes at her eyes and then adds, "And God stays silent. Does nothing. Condones this madness with his... inattention?" <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She locks one of her arms around Bear tightly as she adds, "If you speak to Michael again - if you ask him to confirm this story - he will. He thinks he's righteous. He won't deny what he did." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"I am sure that" the ratchet motherfucker "he would." Terry's eyes glitter briefly, like the eyes of a tiger envisioning his prey and leaping upon it. Slow breath. <br><br>"You said that Michael had been summoned to Earth by a man. What became of him?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;There's a long silence from Cael at Terry's question, as she hugs her dog close, and runs her hand through his fur. "Good dog," she murmurs softly. "Good boy, Bear. You take good care of me, huh?" She takes another deep breath and repeats, "Good boy." The dog's tail wags excitedly at this praise - but the words seem meant to calm Cael just as much as praising the dog. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Finally she looks back to Terry as she adds, "I don't really feel comfortable saying much more about that man, or his current situation. He's alive. He... didn't intend any of this. And I'm going to punch him in the fucking jaw when this is all over, but- ...I think that's all I can say. You can ask Sims, he might tell you more. He might not. Sorry." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"Of course," Terry says, nodding, "I do have an interview lined up. Thank you for speaking about this... I know it must have been-"<br><br>No, he /doesn't/ know, but this is one of those moments where spoken language is thoroughly inadequate. "Thank you," he settles on that. "Is there anything else you would like to share?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cael takes another moment to think silently, then shakes her head in response. "No," she answers. "I- that's the story. That's what happened, and if telling it- if that can do any sort of good, change the outcome of this fight, help anyone realize just how wrong the angels are then- well, then it's good. I want to use what Michael did against him. We have to stand together against this guy." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She's silent for a moment before adding, "The people serving Michael - the humans in his army - he could be doing this to them. Affecting them. Filling them with that love, and acceptance. It's addictive. You'll do anything to feel worthy of that love - even hurt your friends. I don't know if there's a way to tell if that's what he's doing or not but- ...I worry that he is." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>Terry nods, "I have seen it. At work. I'm pretty sure," he says. He stands up and heads towards the camera, to turn it off. "I am pretty sure that that's what Michael hit Caitlin with," he says, frowning.<br><br>"You said his influence broke when they tried to capture him. So his influence can waver... if he is distracted enough?" he ponders. Another question to ask the mystics, perhaps.<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Yeah," Cael agrees. "It's the sort of thing that would make someone say 'if Michael did that to you, then you must have deserved it' after a story like that," she says in a sad voice, with an undercurrent of bitter pain. "I try not to hold it against her. Michael's powerful - it's not her fault. I had no chance of fighting his influence. None, so why should she? <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"...but I blame her anyways," she admits with a wry smile. "I... can't help but feel angry." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She presses her lips together before clarifying, "They bound Michael. I think they only succeeded because he was in a human host, and it limited his power. I don't think you can bind him now. Only when he was bound did his influence break. I collapsed from the pain... and Sara healed me. It was rough, though." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>The Cheshire takes the camera off the tripod. "I wonder," he says, checking that the file saved correctly, and then turning back to face Cael, "what would happen if that summoning ritual were tried again on him. By someone who was a creature of chaos. If a /human/ body limited his power, I wonder..."<br><br>He trails off and stares into the distance for a few seconds, gears spinning in his head. "Well. I guess that's another question to ask Jon."<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"...I don't know that that's a good idea. I don't trust the idea of anyone summoning him again, and beside - it wasn't //Michael// that was summoned. It was just... 'an angel' and Michael chose to respond. He saw it was an opportunity to initiate this game of his. This trial. A chance to purge humanity of its sins and purify them, and remake reality." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cael hesitates a moment and then adds uncertainly, "There were a few things I left off of the tape. Not much, but- ...a few things." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"Nothing you should feel obliged to share with me," Terry says, placing the camera on the small table, powered down, "Unless you want to. Otherwise, I can take you back wherever you want. Do you need to take some time to rest?"<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"It-" Cael's voice is uncertain, and hesitant, a frown pulling at her lips as she considers what she'd held back. Was there any harm in telling it? "I don't feel obligated," she asserts. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"...despite Michael's promise of freeing me, of unburdening me, the spirits of his other victms were bound eternally to the crosses where they were killed. Suffering. Bleeding from their wounds. They weren't freed and sent to heaven. Sims was able to get them to share the story of what had happened to them - Sara was able to free them from their chains, and send them to rest. That's... what would have happened to me. My friends would have found me, dead, suffering, and chained. More than anything, more than if I lived or not - I didn't want them to find me that way. You know?" <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>Terry frowns, looking at Cael for several long, silent seconds. When he finally speaks, it is with a thread of voice. "Yes. I... would have felt the same way."<br><br>"I know Jon said that Michael believes he is doing the right thing." He bites his lower lip, "But that only goes so far. And it doesn't go nearly far enough to attenuate anything he has done in this. Not even in the slightest. One may smile, and smile, and be a villain."<br><br>"Do you want me to share... what became of the victims' souls in my article? While it may help to highlight just how monstrous Michael is, I understand if..."<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"That I'm not sure of..." Cael admits, letting out a heavy sigh. "I'd say it's too fantastical to believe, but... angels are invading Manhattan to end all of reality," she remarks in a dry tone, her voice tired. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;She's silent for a while, then shakes her head. "I'm not sure I'm thinking clear enough to decide if that should be public or not. I- Well. I've no desire to undermine your journalistic integrity, but would you mind checking with Jon? If you're willing - letting him read the article to see if there's any facts he thinks should be held back would be ideal - but I worry that strays too close to censorship." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cael seems calmer now - so the pup has gone back to simply resting his head in her lap, while Cael strokes him gently, and periodically sips at her tea. <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"Cael..." Terry says quietly, "You are being interviewed by the Cheshire Cat who is a team-mate of an Amazon who comes from a land of immortal ancient Greek women, about angels ending the world. In this day and age, nothing is too fantastical anymore," he offers her a gentle smile. <br><br>"But you are right, I can check with Jon. I am due to interview him tomorrow and I'll make sure to touch base on this before the article is published." <br><br>"I need to go get this over to my desk. Would you like to stay here for a bit while I lock it up? I'll come back and then I can drop you off wherever you want." <br><br>He glances at the pup and smiles a little. "He's the best boy."<br> <br>

:'''{{#var:2924|Cael Becker (2924)}} has posed:'''<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Up until a couple months ago, I didn't believe in magic or Gods. Now my boyfriend is leading a fight against the forces of God to save all of reality, and an angel very personally wants me dead," Cael says in a try tone. "...it's all still pretty fantastical to me." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;It takes her a moment to realize what she just said - and her eyes go wide, her back straightening a little. "That you don't print. That, uh, last part," she says hastily. <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Letting out a sigh she adds, "You go lock up your things - I'll just finish my coffee, then you can take me back. Just- ...make something good out of all this, yeah? Do some good with it somehow. Please." <br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;After another scritch at Bear she adds, "The very best. ...you can pet him before we go back, by the way. If you like. I'm... alright now." <br> <br>

:'''{{#var:339|Terry O'Neil (339)}} has posed:'''<br>"Of course. I'll be back in a bit. And then I can pet the floof." He smiles a little. "... I also have some of my mom's Tiramisu in the fridge in the break room. I'll put some of it in a tupperware so you can take it back. Trust me, it's worth it."<br><br>And as he reaches the door, he adds, "And don't worry. Not printing a word of that last part." He closes the door behind him as he leaves.<br> <br>
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