18848/It's the End of the World (In general)

It's the End of the World (In general)
Date of Scene:	16 August 2024
Location:	Bar With No Doors
Synopsis:	Two Magicians walk into a bar and discuss the end of the world.
Cast of Characters:	Selene Gallio, Zachary Zatara

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Selene Gallio has posed:
It's rare for Selene Gallio to disappear from the environs of the Hellfire Club just to attend another watering hole. At least, not without an ulterior motive to poach an employee for the Club, or to descend upon some unsuspecting superbeing for nefarious purposes.

But it's not every day the end of the world is announced. Well, it is. But it's not every day the pronouncement seems worryingly genuine. And while she's sure the Hellfire Club will be filled with the titans of industry and technology, shivering in terror (And not the sort she is often paid to inflict).

And while Selene has visited taverns, inns, and, one must assume 'The Big Local Cave' in prehistory when comets flew overhead, humantiy has advanced as best they can.

And a truly pesky amount of them have dabbled in magic, and even gathered together in secret places.

And so Selene finds herself perched at the bar, hair swept back in raven waves, shoulders and back bared as she's indeed dressed 'up' for this little foray, into a black dress with plunging neckline, and a high slit up the right side to somewhere north of her hip.

She's even drinking a fluorescent blue drink with a small umbrella and a cherry garnish as she sighs out, "I swear to god... magicians rush to their secret bars like roaches with the lights on when trouble like this comes up... and /this/ is the time I pick the wrong one?"

Zachary Zatara has posed:
Ah yes. The end of the world.

Or so they say anyway. Growing up in Shadowcrest Zachary Zatara is uniquely aware of just how many mystical close calls there have been. The family home being something of a repository for bound extradimensional horrors and various occult tomes they can be used to summon them. Or generally dramatically change the world for the worse. Usually in the 'everyone goes insane and gets eaten' sort of way.

Is he perhaps a little nonchalant about the whole business? Probably. He didn't even show up to the JLD meeting about Galactus because... well honestly what the heck would he be contributing? Unless someone has a really really REALLY huge sheet to throw over the planet so he can do a vanishing trick his skills aren't really all that useful.

But in times such as this there is one thing he can do. Get a stiff drink. People tend to be a lot less lax about drinking ages when they're worried they're going to die as part of an interstellar buffet.

His own drink of choice? A Manhattan. And of course there's a carrot juice for Bunny with a carrot stick that's hollowed out to work like a straw.

He doesn't turn when Selene makes her proclamation but, with wry amusement, replies "I don't think most people even know about the 'situation' yet. This is just the usual crowd. Of course because this place doesn't really exist anywhere specific who knows /when/ half the patrons are visiting from. They could be hiding from completely different disasters."

Selene Gallio has posed:
Eyes roll as Selene sighs out, "They should. It's on the news and everything. Though I suppose... that does make it seem less believable, doesn't it? After all, Doctor Doom has threatened the world many times. And now? Now he's known mostly for that tacky coffee shop chain. What about an authoritarian regime screams 'Makes good lattes' to people I will never know..."

She sighs and frowns slightly, "But I think people might be serious about this one. I suppose that's not the worst thing of course. When trying times arise, those with ambition and talent can take advantage. People just want security after all. Or the illusion of it."

Selene's definitely not going to consider the very real possibility that some knight in chainmail or cave-dwelling sage in burlap robes might wander in during an attempt to escape the End of Days that was actually one of her previous schemes. Because time travel is a headache.

Still, she sips at her drink after lifting it in a brief toast to the dynamic duo of Zachary and Bunny, "Personally? Every would-be apocalypse I've lived through hasn't been all it's been cracked up to be. Mind you, they've never involved some weird alien with a passion for the Beach Boys showing up before."

She chews her lower lip for a long moment and sighs, "But I suppose it's going to be one of those times where anyone with the resources and foresight to set up a comfortable little hidey-hole will do so. It might be time to a little vacation to some other world... it /is/ summer, so I wouldn't be missing out on any season premieres of television. But there are so few fantastical realms with indoor plumbing and heated water."

Zachary Zatara has posed:
"The worlds been about to end more times than anyone can count," Zachary points out. "I'm sure this time won't be any different. It's just some giant space monster it can't be any more trouble than an eldritch horror or the literal armies of heaven itself trying to unmake /everything/."

Bunny, who /was/ looking at Selene and has only just stopped gawking, finally chips in with "Maybe we should just send a big parcel of carrots and it'll go away."

Zach raises and eyebrow, then snorts with laughter. "Probably that's a better plan than some people will have come up with. Utterly doomed to failure but still.." He swirls his drink and then takes a sip. "Italy has a reputation for great coffee, doesn't grow in the region of course, but they uh. Famously dabbled in authoritarian regimes so... Perhaps that's why?"

"I think that's the part which I find the most insulting," he says after a long pause. "It's just so very... tacky. Where is the class in a planet eating alien? There's no style. No pizazz. It's barely better than 'rock falls everyone dies'. I'm sure it'll make for a spectacle if no-one stops it. But really if I'm going to die horribly I at least want it to be at the hands of a mad God unravelling all of space and time."

Bunny glances at Zach and blinks a few times.

"What? I'm just saying we'll hardly be better than the dinosaurs if this is how we get wiped out."

Bunny takes another slurp of her carrot juice and then smiles at Selene. "Can't you just magic up indoor plumbing?"

Selene Gallio has posed:
Selene grins, just a touch too broad, teeth a little too ivory even against her pale complexion as she murmurs out, "Oh, certainly /people's/ worlds have been teetering on the edge of calamity... but empires fall, civilizations fade to dust... the /world/ is still there in the end. This is, if we're to believe the colorful pajama patrol, something different." She clucks softly and sighs, "Which, really, makes one wonder why they should be in charge of the response to it. Can people who can't do what's necessary about a homicidal clown /really/ be trusted to go to the necessary extents to handle this particular threat?"

One eyebrow quirks as for a long moment, Bunny earns Selene's full, intent focus. Eyes glint, gleam, narrow slightly before her tongue glosses black painted lips and she hums out, "Oh, I think that would be a delightfully charming attempt, dear. But I have a sinking feeling this particular... being? Force? Whatever it may be, has appetites less likely to sway vegetarian, and more towards the... exotic. Vampirism en masse, I suppose. It clearly doesn't just eat planets, or we could give it Mars. Or Venus. Yes yes, the astrologers /and/ astronomers would both wail and gnash their teeth, but... they'd be united! A miracle, of sorts."

She dips her head to Zachary and murmurs out, "Yes, and... really, so many arrogant scientists with their telescopes and their flying suits and spaceships, and /no one/ noticed this? I mean, I suppose it's very possible they knew of it and didn't mention it. As I said, arrogance. Though I think the last time people dealt with that particular level of arrogance it involved the invention of the guillotine. I suppose we could put some neon lights on the next model if it seems too pedestrian to voice the public outrage with the original."

She sighs then and dips her head towards Bunny, "You'd be surprised how often they burn you as a witch for doing that. Or even just trying to teach someone the basics of the actual technology. Peasants. They really /are/ just... the worst to deal with."

Zachary Zatara has posed:
"The Angels wanted to destroy /everything/," Zach points out. "Not just the planet. And there have been countless other mystical threats of that level over the centuries."

The number of which are due to Selene would probably surprise you. Certainly it'll be a non-zero amount...

"I'm sure someone will figure it out. If nothing else there are enough Super-people to just physically haul a giant planet eating monster away. The Joker is... I mean he's pretty terrible but it's a question of scale. He's generally not even trying to wipe out a city. You'd hope the same morality of 'no killing' will be put on hold for something that isn't just going to wipe out /our/ planet but will keep going around killing planets for who knows how long."

Bunny frowns, brow furrowing like she's thinking really really hard, before she sighs. "Something /doesn't like carrots/. Huh."

Zach makes another little shrug. Explaining the details of Galactus to Bunny is not something he's going to even attempt. Planet eating aliens is not a concept rabbits are really cut out to deal with.

"Given it must be moving faster than light to even reach us in a timescale which matters... I suspect most scientists had no clue it was coming. One minute it'll be a little speck. The next it's here." He motions to the bar staff, requesting another drink, then drains the last of his Manhattan. "If it wasn't cheating with the travel stuff it'd be a problem for future generations. And wouldn't even make the news. People can barely wrap their heads around ruining the environment for future generations. Why would they care about an alien eating their great grandchildren?"

Probably anyone trying to burn Selene is going to have a worse time than Selene herself. But it'd be rude to point that out. This might be neutral ground but there is no sense pushing what is clearly some apex magical threat pretending to be a person.

Or at least it's clear from the way Zach's magical senses have been sounding a silent alarm....

"I always find the best policy with magic tricks is don't tell anyone how they work," he admits. "Just don't let the locals know you've invented indoor plumbing. Easy."

Selene Gallio has posed:
Selene sighs and shakes her head slowly. "Those angels. So judgy. Which... I suppose /is/ their purpose. But still, you'd think they'd have considered that whatever they were so pissy about wasn't the /entire universe's fault/."

She nods solemnly and rolls her eyes, "Oh, I'm sure we'll discover at the last moment that every piece of technology launched into space in the last fifteen years that was bigger than a suitcase was some subcomponent of a giant Iron Man. It probably won't be piloted by teenagers in color-coordinated costumes at least. Probably."

She offers Bunny a wry little grin, "I know, can you believe it? Not liking carrots when they have such a charming spokesperson?"

And then, Selene's moving with sudden, almost unnatural smoothness, rising to her feet, that slinky dress flowing and swaying in ways that seem like they should be entirely inappropriate, and yet somehow it seems to obey its Mistress and always stop just short of being as revealing as it should. And then she sighs out and rolls her head side to side slowly, "Well! I do hope we meet again... provided, as you say, the colorful costume crew manages to save us from being consumed by... something so alien as to think 'Shiny naked man on a surfboard' is somehow... a universally accepted herald of its approach? Aliens. So weird."

And of course, this is said as she wiggles her fingers in a little wave to one of the merpeople swimming about the nearby subaquatic bar.

Zachary Zatara has posed:
"Or that the big entity upstairs might have wiped out everything themself if that was 'the plan'," Zach replies with a laugh. "Probably a pretty awful life being an Angel. You're essentially stuck as middle management for eternity watching all the mortals run around enjoying themselves and gradually writing you off as being irrelevant or made up entirely. With the occasional interlude of harp playing to break up the tedium."

His brow furrows for a moment. "I can't imagine being a demon is /better/ but at least it's a lot less hypocritical."

Bunny shakes her head. No she really can't believe it. "Maybe we just need a /really big carrot/."

When Selene rises he turns offering her a bow, which is remarkably polished given he's sitting on a bar stool and has been drinking for some time, and which takes place cocktail glass still in hand. Without so much as spilling a drop.

"Oh even if they don't I expect the more magical types will be fine. There are plenty of other places. Fae realms, parallel dimensions, alternate timelines, the distant past, and all the usual places you're not really supposed to venture. And given the choice between certain death and having to learn to love speaking in Latin.... Well the past beats dead."

He winks. "Aliens are by their nature. Alien."

"Anyway it was a pleasure making your acquaintance," he glances sideways at Bunny. Who chimes in with a wave of her hand. "Bye bye scary lady!"