15616/ACME Practical Joke Factory Reopening

ACME Practical Joke Factory Reopening
Date of Scene:	14 August 2023
Location:	Burnley - Bleake Island
Synopsis:	River Banks and her teammate Robin face off against the fowl fiend the JOKER at the grand reopening of one of many ACME Practical Joke Factories in the Gotham Practical Joke Factory district. No, we don't know why Gotham has one either.
Cast of Characters:	Talia al Ghul, River Banks, Tim Drake

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Talia al Ghul has posed:
In recent months, the abandoned AC(M)E Chemical Plant had reopened under it's original manageemnt. Followed by a series of reinvestments into the abandoned practical joke warehouse and gag items district in the city, which was near the abandoned amusement park district of the city. Why exctly these two districts coincided was something that likely even lifelong Gothamites for the life of them had never figured out.

Currently, one of said practical joke factories is being reopened. Giant smokestacks go up into the air belching out 'La Cucharacha' as a bald man wearing a bow tie is using a set of giant foam hands to use an ungainly set of giant foam scissors ready over on a ribbon. "It pleases me to have you here today for the grand reopening of our local factory!" The man, the CEO of the Company that Made Everything was doing it himself.

River Banks has posed:
    It was a a gig. It was a gig and River was telling herself that beneath a plastered-on smile and a dress that could have easily been picked up in the kid's section for how much it covered. It was supposed to be a mo deling gig, stand with the nice people. Smile. Don't freak out. Her cheeks were hurting from smiling so much, and she was already thanking goodness she was the 'sneaky' kind of bank robber and not the 'punchy' kind of bank robber -- dental is EXPENSIVE.

    Hair and make up done, scars covered with make up or strategically placed sleeves, and not a Red Hood in sight to laugh at her. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

    She also waves a couple of large novelty foam hands and jumps up and down in a pair of pumps!

Tim Drake has posed:
    Yeah, there's no way this opening isn't going to be targeted by the Joker, right? That's Red Robin's justification for watching over it, at least. Clad in his red and black uniform, cape rustling slightly in the wind, he remains in the shadows atop a nearby building, beneath the protective overlay of a chimney. It's the tiniest scrap of shade, but it's enough for a Bat to fold itself up in and brood.

    For the time being, all he is doing is observing from his perch, a pair of binoculars pressed against the lenses of his domino mask. The people in the crowd are studied for any signs of ill intent, and ran through facial recognition for hits in any of the databases the Bats have backdoor access into. He's quiet, breathing in and out so steadily that it may as well be silent, but he makes the faintest of noise when his focus shifts to one of the ladies working the event.

    "River Avon Banks," he says to himself. Within seconds her missing persons report from Florida is displayed on his HUD, as well as the crimes of her father that she is tenuously linked to. It's suspicious in and of itself, why she's here in Gotham now. But he'll keep an eye on her for the time being. Something about her feels familiar in a way that Tim can't quite place.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
She could also be here for the train wreck that's in the making. Hopefully just from a model train museum, rather than a real train hit by a shrink ray and let on the open rooftop. Gotham could be really weird sometimes.
    The CEO would go on, "The ACME brand has always been a setter of standards! Namely, low ones. We're the baseline that every company likes to brag they exceed after all! It's a pleasure to return here to Gotham after so long away! This city is beautiful, and it's a pleasure to be back in business! Each attendee here will be given a free novel exploding cigar! Have one! Give it to your friends! Use your Spaceballs Da Flamethrower to light it!" A series of confused claps go on.
    "It's a pleasure as well to present to you the largest gimmick whoopie cushion out of Burbank and the ballpit! Just remember to sign the waivers and to keep your children on a leash before you let them in. There's a passageway to the dimension where missing socks go to, we think!"

The giant novelty foam hands are used with the giant novelty scissors to cut the ribbon! Which starts a process of the rope unleashing a large mallet, which spins through the air to hit the CEO on the head, which has him dazedly hopping around, right as his hops upset a precariously positioned bowling ball, which rolls over to land on a foot, and then catapults a large array of marbles onto the ground, which he would fall flat on his back from in an impressive performance straight out of the Studio Lot Water Tower maximum security incarceration facility.

River Banks has posed:
    River, honestly, was here for the acting modeling gig. A pretty face that was agreeable to showing up to a grand opening of what is assuredly Joker bait?

    They signed her on and didn't even disclose the hazard pay!

    So she tip-toes in the pumps, and gasps, and looks appropriately shocked at the Rube-Goldberg machine of Ribbon Cutting and Cheap laughs, cheeks still hurting from smilling so much as she looks also dubiously to the ball pit, and endevors to never let her little brother into one of those things.

    She also has no idea she's been spotted and ID'd by Red Robin.

Tim Drake has posed:
    The speech is kind of baffling, from someone who's been around for his fair share of stakeholder meetings and public releases. But he's also never worked for a toy company, so what does he know? Maybe this is all par for the course.

    Red Robin's face pulls away from the binoculars purely out of shock as the series of tragic(ally hilarious) events proceeds, with the end result seeing the CEO flat on his back. There's no way that wasn't the result of one of Joker's ploys, right? That's what Tim thinks, at least, so he emerges from his cramped patch of shadows to begin his descent towards the ground, hoping across a gap onto a fire escape that will eventually see him down to street level.

    Once there, he sticks to the alleyway until he can pop back up inside the perimeter of the newly reopened factory, close enough that he can observe the event via peeking around the corner. It's a precarious position, but he has his grapple gun unclipped from his belt and at the ready if he needs to make a quick getaway.

    And for now River remains in his peripheral vision while he scans the rest of the crowd.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
The company has a reputation to maintain after all. They also may or may not have been responsible for the great Wall Street collapse of 1929 and Starfleet's R&D department. But, even as the CEO goes to slowly get up. "Uhh.. So where was I." An underling goes up and offers helpfully.
    "Showcasing the fake chattering teeth." Marvin, the CEO would pipe up. "Here we have the fake chattering teeth on an array of marbles.. Oh, wait, I fell on those. Never mind!" Taking a step forwards, hitting the marbles, falling again, a fresh bowling ball landing on his head to a loud 'DONK' sound.

    Then from the outside is a loud, loud shriek of laughter. "Never say never again, kiddos and loonies! how could I miss such a stand up event! Well, I suppose I'll make it a stand down one! Namely just leveling it! I can't have such shoddy competition after all!" Outside would be the maniacal man that they had all been warily waiting for! But he looked a little different. Even by Joker standards.
    Why did he have a mustache painted over white to match his skin tone?

River Banks has posed:
    The company has a reputation for the ridiculous -- and when the laughter shrieks across the audience, River loses that plastered-on smile, and she recognizes that when even Gothamn City screams there is something Bad happening.

    Off come the pumps, and in her tights-clad feet she reaches down and helps another one of the day-of models hired on up, discarding the foam rubber hands.

    "Y'all got emergency exits for this kinna nonsense?" She asks, keeping her cool about her, and she titcks her head to the side. "Git."

    And she reaches for her backpack, looking up at the Joker and feeling a sinking of her stomach akin to dropping a brand new cell phone over the side of a boat and watching a grouper eat it.

Tim Drake has posed:
    And suddenly Red Robin has a moment, just a moment, of deep relief at being on the inside of the factory rather than the outside, where the Joker is. At least that sounds like the Joker... but it doesn't exactly look like him, which gives Tim a moment of pause.

    Of all the options, though, none of them are particularly good. Joker decided to get plastic surgery? Some new name in the city trying to muscle in on the Joker's turf? Alternate universe Joker? Even if it isn't the Joker himself, anyone trying to ape his shtick is liable to be very, very dangerous until proven otherwise.

    When he overhears River asking for an emergency exit, he lets out a sharp whistle. It could just be the call of a bird, but hopefully it attracts her attention, so that Tim can gesture over his shoulder in the direction he came from.

    Either way, he takes a deep breath and strides forward, careful to avoid stepping on any marbles himself as he swaps out his grapple gun for his staff, which snaps into its full length with a quick flick of Tim's wrist. "You should all probably run now," he says, voice grim.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
Does it relaly matter? Joker is always Joker. No matter the different looks. He changes them often enough. It might as well be back to normal as soon as he's back in Arkham with no one the wiser. Joker grins over. "Why hello there Kid Wonder.. Or should I say Boy Blunder?" There was the taunts, which were.. Rather odd. But still terrifying in their own way.
    The CEO gets up from the ground, "Yeah, we have emergency jet packs everywhere! And roller skates. And I think a rocket powered merry go round horse but that hasn't been used since the 50's. Same with the rocket powered bat suit. We got a lot of frequent customsers for tha tone. Dang shame we never worked out the bugs." Any sort of reminiscing is put off by another giggling Joker screech. "Come on folks! You'll get half off our fake vomit and a free joybuzzer from the gift shop!"
    And the Gothamites.. Go to immediately peel towards the exits. None of the usual lollygagging, no panicking, no threats or yells. Being guided towards the reach of safety in a way that seems to defy the way normal Gotham citizens are when there's the Joker around.
    Joker would wakl towards Red Robin, "So, Boy Blunder, I was thinking we could start this off by playing a game. Namely Rock 'Em, Sock 'Em. At him boys!"
    A group of thugs wearing the normal 'clown' makeup wiht numbers over their outfits (THug #1, Thug #2, etc) would go to approach.

River Banks has posed:
    River freezes for a moment when she looks to Red Robin -- what *is* it with all the Reds in the area? -- but she gets a grim, calm sort of air about her, guiding the other women out and to safety before she rids herself of the cheap dress and applies a quick change with the familiarity of someone who's had to duck and change on the quick MANY times.

    Up comes the paintball face mask and goggles, a blue tee shirt and pair of atheltic pants completing the cheap, second-had-store outfit, but at least she's got some kneepads on this time as she ducks out. She should be running, of course -- not like it's her town.

    ... but that dang sense of Altruism...

    And what LUCK that there is a pile of water balloons (filled admittedly with disappearing-reappearing ink, Acme brand of course) -- one of which she picks up and launches at Thug the Second.

    "Hey y'all, is this where we sign up to give out ass-whuppin's?" she calls out, "Cause all I heard that whole speech was HEEE-HAW!" she imitates a donkey, specifically to get someone's goat.

Tim Drake has posed:
    Alright. Any Joker is a dangerous Joker, no matter their origin. That's what's important here. He has no idea what to do except try to protect the folks evacuating. If there's any concern about how calmly they're all getting out of dodge, then he'll express it later, because for now it just makes his job easier.

    "Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots was an old game even back when I was a little kid," he points out, voice flat and clearly unwilling to engage in the game Joker wants him to. Maybe that's on purpose, just to make him mad. Well his new backup goes after Joker in the more traditional route, but that can be effective too.

    First things first, though: he tosses down a smoke grenade in the midst of the thugs to give him a defensive cover before he dives in, swinging his staff towards the head of Thug #1 before he dives down and sweeps a leg out to try and trip up Thug #2.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
Thug #1 goes to take a tumble over towards Thug #2 with a loud BONK! Wait, it's almost like there's something flashing over for just a moment, spelling out a loud 'WHUMPH' over to the blow. What di dhe put in those smoke grenades? Maybe it's just the lead paint and aesbestos from the factory going off. Yeah, probably something laong those lines. Just more weirdness.
    Joker would grin, "Well, since you want to play that game? Here, let's start clowning around!" Joker goes to reach over towards his vest. "Nothing u my sleeve.. But.." Out from his coat goes to spring one MASSIVE extending punching glove that shoots out all the way towards River despite all the distance between them!
    Presuming it does possibly hit her, perhpas if so, there's a large 'WHAM' from it!

River Banks has posed:
    Riv -- no, RIPTIDE, doesn't seem very amused, her flat intonation and easy movements don't lend themselves to someone being a bit worked up to fight the Joker.

    SHe's keeping a hard tamp down on her remotions right now, giving the Joker a damp reception as she brings the next water balloon up, popping it and catching the water, she uses it as a shield, feeling the shockwave of the WHUMP of the boxing glove against the water shield.

    "Ever see the trick where someone dived inta the cup a' water?" she asks, "Ever seen the reverse?"

    And another water balloon filled with ink rises up, and slings itself towards the Joker to hit him in the middle -- nice big spot to aim for. "Fought a lotta clowns, ain't one like you though -- all had better make-up!"

Tim Drake has posed:
    Wait... was that a visible sound effect? Oh, great, he's been drugged by the Joker. Red Robin's mouth turns down at the corners into a visible frown, his forehead furrowed with concern. Does he feel funny? In the heat of battle it's often hard to tell what's normal, what's adrenaline, and what's a secret third thing.

    He tumbles out of the smoke cloud and spins around, shuriken in hand as his cape spreads around him from the sudden stop of momentum. "Riptide," he greets before throwing the shuriken aimed at Joker's hand, trying to disarm him. "Joker's dangerous. If things get too dicey, cut and run. Get to Hood, he'll keep you safe."

    Putting the Joker up against Jason is likely to end with someone dead, and at this point in his life Tim doesn't expect it'll be his brother, but who else can he potentially send River to? Batman would have to find her, not the other way around, and the rest of the Bats are similarly stealthy.

    He returns his attention to the Thugs, going after numbers 3 and 4 with a spin kick for the former followed up by a quick jab across the jaw for the other one.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
Given what's up with River, probably best to not try and cry her one either. That level of pun might drive her to be a breaking wave. It could wash over everything and blast it out to sea! Even as Joker goes to face off with Riptide, the sound of what is a wound up wet towel being SMACKED over at someone echos through the area. The sound is no doubt familiar, painful, and agonizing for anyone that's ever had to go through the locker room after PE. Something perpetually remindful of juvenile suffering.
    Joker is driven back, yelling, "Oh ho ho! So that's the way it's going to be! Let me see what else is up my sleeve.." He goes to rather melodramatically yank off.. His hand!? "No, wait, wrong one." Hand popping out, then going to pop down to reveal a very large cannon! "Time to test this boom tube!" If River doesn't dodge, there would be a loud *BOOM* of highly confusing proportions. And yes, Joker's real hand was still under there.
    Robin's gone to take down the last of the thugs over with a BAM WHANG POW that leaves them all on the ground dazed! And then it's time for Red Robin to join the fight against Joker! Or rig up some highly convoluted rube goldberg trap!

River Banks has posed:
    "Ain't that the tru--" River whispers regarding Red Hood keeping her safe.

    Actually, he would probably have come in with guns akimbo yelling at her with a lot of colorful four-letter words if he knew what she was doing. Not that she knew. I mean, the dude tazed her.

    The Boom Tube (someone's going to sue him for that one) errupts with a BANG!

    There's a lot of BOOM

    She doesn't get enough water in time and flailingly falls back and over the stage, skittering on leftover marbles, a pair of chattering teeth sticking to her sneakers, and with a cry, dramatic, wailing, Riptide gets dumped into what looks like a pool of mountain dew! Surely this means it's ACID!

Tim Drake has posed:
    Okay, goons taken care of. That's several less things to worry about. Red Robin looks over to the Joker, and his eyes follow the invisible line from the villain's cannon to River. His mouth opens to call out a warning but he's too slow, and Riptide goes flailing backwards. It's as if it all happens in slow-motion, her tripping and slowly tipping backwards until she falls.

    As a temporary stalling measure Tim throws out an electrified shuriken towards the Joker before he takes off at a run, though he has to navigate over the marbles and chattering teeth with a quick grapple trip so that he can make it to the pool of... bright lemon-lime liquid. He doesn't dive in but he does peer over the edge to see if she's... you know, alive.

Talia al Ghul has posed:
The Joker goes to laugh, hoot, and holler! "Oh, don't worry Boy Blunder! I have even more fun in store!" Up in the air, a large purple helicopter is flying through the air. Large neon letters spelling out 'JOKER' rest over it. It has a winch underneath it that's holding a huge, classic black spherical bomb!

"Because sometimes you just need to send them the bomb! So come on Boy Blunder, let's see well well you handle the boom! AHAHAHAHAAH!" The helicopter flies through the air, bomb dangling down at the bottom of the chain!

River Banks has posed:
    The Southern River bursts up from the green lemon-lime liquid and sputters, coughing, shaking her head out.
    "UGH. It's CHEAP and NASTY and in mah NOSE an' it's FLAT." she protests, and then she grabs onto the side of thel azy river of pop, and hefts herself up before looking up at Red Robin...

    "Did he say 'bomb'?"

Tim Drake has posed:
    That it's actually Mountain Dew (or, as Tim expects, a cheap knockoff version) is enough to momentarily flabbergast him. He's stock-still for a split second, staring down at River as she hauls herself out of the soda. Which is not acid. Take a breath, Red Robin, things are going to be okay.

    Well, they were, until the Joker summons a helicopter with a bomb attached to it. "He said bomb," Tim replies, voice as flat as the soda Riptide just came out of. He looks down at her. "If I cut it down, can you provide a well-placed pool of water to catch it?"

    Whether or not she says she can -- or even whether or not she thinks she can -- River is just going to have to try, because they have no time, so Red Robin pulls another shuriken from his belt and whips it up at the chain connecting the bomb to the helicopter!

Talia al Ghul has posed:
Shouldn't it be Bat-Shuriken? Alas, Tim may not be maintaining market branding here! Crawling her way out of the Dew, River is able to make her way up and out just in time to see the helicopter flying on high! Joker goes to cackle.
    "Don't worry, time to send the bomb! Because all your base!" He goes to hoot and holler, even as the bomb goes to drop through the air, falling in slow motion towards River! Quick!

River Banks has posed:
    "Ah kin try." is River's response, because ordinarily her fine control? Well, that relies on her being in control.

    So she sets herself in, and she considers how bomb that bomb is, how big is the boom, and if that could, in fact, hit that little one-bedroom that her brother is currently in, studying on his fancy online school -- and the Joker, bombing her brother?

    Well, that'd get anyone mad, wouldn't it?

    So that disgustingly weird knock-off Mountain Dew (probably called Mountain Mist or Misty Hooch or some other weird knock off branding) rises up as she stays start still, raising her hands with the motion and she tries to create a landing pad for that bomb to splash down into!

Tim Drake has posed:
    River can try. That's all Tim can ask. And in the meantime, there's one important thing he has to do. So Red Robin turns, cape flaring out dramatically, and stalks right up to the Joker, so that he can punch him right in the kisser. KAPOW! goes flying up over their heads. "Holy tired villain gimmicks, Batman," he mutters under his breath.

    And then he's standing by at the landing pad to observe the bomb's... well, landing! If the fuse goes out thanks to the bath of off-brand Mountain Dew, then that's a wrap folks! Otherwise he's ready to fish it out and run it towards... well, somewhere away from here!

Talia al Ghul has posed:
As the bomb goes to fizzle, there's a -BWISH-. What sort of sound would knock off mountain don't make? And then Joker looks blank, "Where's the kaboom? Ther eshould be" That's met over with Tim's fist hitting him!
    Joker goes flying through the air over to land in a set of garbage cans which would all fall atop him and flatten him.
    "... Oh, there it is."
    There's a hum through the air and River might almost /swear/ someone was going 'That-That-That's all folks!'