3617/Dead Gold

Dead Gold
Date of Scene:	29 September 2020
Location:	Brooklyn
Synopsis:	Booster Gold pushes his #AllGoldEverything campaign, and Wade Wilson shows up as support. When asked of his true origin, he explains that he's Batman, and escapes with Booster Gold's off-loaded shirts!
Cast of Characters:	Booster Gold, Wade Wilson

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Booster Gold has posed:
"JUST A SMALL-TOWN GIRL!"

Of course he went with this song.

"LIVING IN A LOOOOONELY WOOOOORRRRLD!"

And c'mon, why wouldn't he?

"SHE TOOK A MIDNIGHT TRAIN GOING ANY-WHEEEEERRRRE..."

Journey was the sure bet, according to all the analytics he'd received from Skeets' research. Nostalgic enough for the Gen-X'ers, but relatable enough for the current 18-34 year-old demographics. If the Blonde Bomber was going to use a song to get the busy bodies of Brooklyn to stop in their places, he needed the power of Steve mother-lovin' Perry, and boy was it... loud. Standing atop a golden, customized van with an airbrushed version of him parodying "The Creation of Adam" on the side, the man, himself, was holding a megaphone and encouraging passerby's to sign up for his #AllGoldEverything marketing campaign.

"You, over there, sir -- you look like you could use a dose of superheroics in your life! Miss, you -- you ready for the gooooooooold rush? Then get your name on this mailing list and stay up to date with everything regarding yours truly! You ready? I'm ready. Say it with me, now!" With Skeets, his adorable gold robot zipping around him, Booster leans forward with his hands on his knees before throwing them up into the air.

"BOOSTER GOOOOLLLD, BAY-BAY!"

Wade Wilson has posed:
Wade Wilson is walking down the street looking very mild-mannered. Sure, his face is quite heavily scarred, but he's got on a black X-Men hoodie just like you can get from Hot Topic, some blue jeans, and a fresh pair of red and black Crocs.

With his lamb over rice platter in hand, he doesn't seem intent on stopping anywhere. He's in nirvana, for once he's having a great day, and nothing can go wrong.

"It's Booster Gold!" he suddenly shouts, staring over at the van and immediately running over. "Booster Gold, I'm a //huge// fan. I've heard about //all// of the adventures you've told everyone you went on!"

He suddenly jumps up the side of the van, and then holds his lamb over rise platter out. "You want some lamb over rice? It's an honor to meet you, sir."

See? Literally nothing went wrong, now Booster Gold is here!!!

Booster Gold has posed:
Booster blinks upon seeing Wade jump onto the side of the van, but instinctively puts on that million-dollar smile. "Hey, bud!" he exclaims holding his hand up for a high-five and completely ignoring the rice plate, before turning to Skeets slightly and speaking out the corner of his mouth. "Skeets, scan this guy, pronto -- gettin' the heebie-jeebies." He clears his throat and turns back to Wade. "Havin' a good day? Gettin' some sun? Maybe some... aloe vera moisturizer?" That last part is said with a tiny, nervous laugh, but he continues on. Always be closing.

"So, you signing up for #AllGoldEverything? Hmm? You'll get some cool offers on the current line of merch, with some exclusive news on the fall collection of BG-inspired mensweeeeaaarrrr. Sound good?"

Wade Wilson has posed:
Wade immediately meets Gold's high-five like an excited kid. And a scan of him will quickly find that he's //mutant//, and not packing any weapon except a butter knife in his back pocket. "Hell yeah! You know, as a reformed Jake Pauler, and then a reformed Logan Pauler, and a reformed member of the 9-Year-Old Army, as well as a reformed member of the WWE Universe, I have to say, I'm feeling good about the #AllGoldEverything movement."

"Got any samples?"

Booster Gold has posed:
Samples?

...shoot.

"Um... samples, as in free?" He turns his head slightly to Skeets again, "Skeets, what can we get rid of right now so this guy can L-E-V-E?" Skeets -- not one for discretion -- pipes up at a volume Wade would most definitely be able to hear. "Well, sir, if we're looking to offload some merchandise, I'm showing at least four dozen or so XXXL t-shirts from the 2017 'Biggies for Booster' campaign in the van. Would you like me to confirm?"

Booster's eyes go wide. "That won't be necessary, Skeets. Hey, uh... what's your name, good sir? And how long you been a fan for? You listen to the podcast? I bet you listen to the podcast."

Wade Wilson has posed:
"You bet I listen to the podcast!" Then Wade suddenly laser focuses on Skeets. "Wow is that your robot sidekick, and did it just say //free shirts//?" He holds his hand out to Skeets. "It's an honor to meet you, Sir. I've been a fan from the very beginning. That time you defeated Doomsday?"

He gives a chef's kiss with his fingers.

"You can call me Wade Wilson. Average guy, average life." He takes a fork full of his lamb over rice. "I just admire the heroes of this world who look out for the little guy, like me!"

Booster Gold has posed:
Booster pops his eyebrows as Wade mentions he listened to the podcast. "Well, hot dog," he says, "take as many free shirts as you want, Will!" He hops off the top of the van and tells Skeets to change the music. Immediately, we begin to hear "Hey, Ya!" by Outkast as Booster opens up the doors to the back of the van to enter. He's quietly singing some of the lyrics to himself before coming back out with a huge heap of XXXL Booster tees in his arms, holding them out for Wade while trying to make some small-talk. "So, uh... what's your story? Average guy, average life? Bah, I don't buy that." He takes a closer look at Wade's scarred face and feigns a smile. "I bet you've got tons of... personality."

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Okay you got me." Wade takes a massive wad of shirts, trying to hold them firmly against himself as a few drop out of the pile. "You're Booster Gold, and we superheroes keep our secrets in the family."

He suddenly leans in, starting to whisper. "A long time ago, I was a little boy in the Czech Republic. Day in, day out, there was crime on the streets, until finally my family said, let's move to America."

"Unfortunately... they moved us to Gotham, where I started running with the wrong crowds, joining all the wrong gangs. And then we broke into a factory that does nothing but produce novelty convert merchandise. And that's when I fell into a vat of boiling plastic bats. That's right..." He leans in, looking left to right, and whispers. "I'm Batman."

Then he does a backflip off the van, landing straight up with the pile of shirts in his arms. "See? Only Batman could do that."

Booster Gold has posed:
Despite the showy backflip, there's a skeptical look from Booster, who's never been known for having much of a poker face. Was Booster kinda dense? Sure. But stupid? Well, depends on who you ask. Regardless, his mouth curls to the side with a small "Hmm" leaving his lips. "I dunno, Will. Bats isn't really much of a smiler. That, and in all the time I've known him -- because y'know, I'm like a big deal and stuff -- Bats have never, eeeevvvver given me a compliment. I imagine because he's trying to keep me humble or whatever, which I totally get, but like... he'd never say he was a fan of mine -- of me OR my podcast with T-Dawg. In fact, I don't even think he knows what podcasts are. He's kinda weird like that, dude."

Wade Wilson has posed:
"Well duh, I have to keep my identity a secret. Listen, when I'm in costume, I'll give you a scowl as a secret code, then you'll know for sure." Wade starts to head down the street, hefting the pile of shirts up onto his back. "I better get all of this to an orphanage. You've gotta start 'em young, Goldie! Don't worry, I'll keep a few for myself!"