9062/In the night there is terror...

In the night there is terror...
Date of Scene:	13 December 2021
Location:	Sara and Cael's apartment
Synopsis:	Recovery will be a long road for Cael, and the links in Sara's armor may break before it happens.
Cast of Characters:	Sara Pezzini, Cael Becker

---

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Through the phone call Cael made to Jon, Sara remains quiet at her post by the door. She had taken numerous cushions and pillows and laid them out on the floor, gotten herself the extra fuzzy blanket from the closet and made herself a floor nest right at the door. The only way into the room was through her, and the door would hit her if someone tried to open. That took care of the physical threat, regarding the astral threat... her right hand was wrapped in the gauntlet of Witchblade, the eye open and watching.

Leaning back against the door, she waited until she heard the tale-tell 'beep' of the phone hanging up before speaking. "You need anything?" She asks quietly. "Water, another blanket, Alis to get off your face?

Alis wasn't technically on Cael's face, but she was materialized and pressed up against her. Being dead, she didn't feel it was right for her to go into the trauma all this had been on her, or how she wondered what would have happened to her in that moment were she not also now linked to Witchblade. Would she have just disappeared... forever? No... she wasn't going to talk about that, instead she was going to keep herself right there with Cael, in the 'flesh' until she was told to stop it.

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael had been curled up onto her side, talking quietly into her phone when she called Sims. She clicks off the phone, reaching out to set it on the nightstand near the bed as Sara speaks. She doesn't answer immediately - taking a deep breath in, and then slowly, out again, before she pushes herself up to sit back against the headboard, pulling the blankets up tightly around her, and looking towards Alis with a small, tight smile of acknowledgement.
    Her gaze flicks to Sara next. "You don't need to stay on the floor, you know." Somehow - she's only //just// realizing that that's where Sara has positioned herself. "It's- this is your room." She smiles wryly before she adds, "If I asked for more whiskey - would I get it?"

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Adjusting a pillow, Sara leans back against it and the door once more. She didn't need to sleep, the reality was she didn't need sleep, food, water, none of those things that humans require. She enjoyed those things, so of course she kept doing them once she learned she didn't need to.

"I know how you are about people in the same bed," she comments with a grin. "Besides, I'm comfortable. As for whiskey, that all depends, did you 'take as needed'?" With everything that had happened, there was still one room Sara didn't follow Cael into... the bathroom, so she wasn't certain if Cael had taken any or not.

Alis shifts herself as Cael sits up, making sure she has enough room, then even tucks the blankets around her sister again.

"Nope," Alis pipes up. "Saving those for tomorrow."

Sara then ahs with a nod and picks herself up. Walking over to the dresser she opens the bottom drawer and pulls from it a bottle of Glen Moray Whiskey, and two glasses. Why she keeps them there is anyone's guess, though the whiskey is one of those that costs a pretty penny, saved for special occasions, like when your roommate is kidnapped by an angel.

"One glass," she then says, pulling open the bottle to pour the liquid into each glass. "It's the good stuff too." Once poured, Cael is offered a glass.

Cael Becker has posed:
    The good stuff. So she can't, in good conscience, just hammer is back and ask for more. A smile ghosts briefly across her lips as she takes the glass, murmuring quietly, "You're insidious." Nonetheless - it does work, and she takes only a small sip of the whiskey, feeling the fire working its way down into her stomach as she lets her eyes close.
    "I-" she starts in a quiet, uncertain voice. "I don't know. It might not be too awful if you were- you really don't have to sleep on the floor like that, Sara. I'll be alright."
    She takes another sip of her whiskey before she adds, "Sims is going to see if he can get some wards put up on my room. I know it's dumb, but... I need it. I'll... I'd feel better if there was something that let you know as soon as something's amiss." As she talks, she shifts her weight slightly, letting her shoulder press up against Alis.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara remains standing near the side of the bed, the bottle of whiskey sitting on her dresser now. She takes a small sip from her glass before she sits herself on the side of the bed and offers Cael a smile, with a brow wiggle.

"I get one bottle of Glen Moray a year," she states. "I rarely break into it, so right now I do have a second bottle in one of the drawers. It's a fine sipping whiskey." Another sip to enforce that statement.

"There's lots of room in this bed," Alis adds to Cael's comment. She's attempting to translate Cael's broken attempt to just ask Sara to sleep in the bed too. Then she adds in a teasing tone, "Besides, I can curl up on the foot of the bed and bark at the door."

Sara chuckles, trying to imaging Alis barking but for now let's that go. "So long as you're okay with it Cael," she offers. "And if it is too much, just tell me and I'll curl back up on the floor." Thankfully Sara is one of those people who wears pajamas, which right now is a pair of yoga style PJ bottoms and an over sized police t-shirt.

Cael Becker has posed:
    "I'm okay with it," Cael promises, while rolling her eyes at Alis's offer to play 'guard dog.' After another sip of whiskey, she fixes her gaze back onto her sister.
    "You're alright?" she asks in a quiet voice. "When I- when I woke up there, when I realized what was-" There's a momentary pause before she continues, without quite finishing the thought. "I tried to call for you. I'd- I was hoping I could send you to Sara," for help, "but he- it... said he'd 'severed' you, and I didn't- don't really know what that means." Were they still okay?

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Alis snuggles up to Cael and lays her head on her shoulder, looking up at her sort of side ways.

"I'm okay," she offers, which was mostly true. "He tried to severe me, but all that happened as I got sent to Sara... I mean I think there was something in between, but I don't remember, just know that time passed." She hmms softly, that was the first she had thought about it really.

She remembered /something/ being there and speaking, but none of the words said. She remembered the sensation of its power and then the moment she was shoved away, severed as he called it, but it wasn't that.

"He didn't severe anything," she then adds. "He... shoved me out, which is different, and I think he didn't expect me to come back, cause he was sure surprised to see that I'd led Sara and the others right to you."

Sara takes another small sip as Alis is speaking, her mind reaching back to the moment Alis just popped out of no where rambling in a panic at the speed of light about what had happened.

"Alis' connection to Witchblade makes it impossible for that sort of thing to have much success," she adds once she thought about it. "But that doesn't really answer the question Alis... are you really alright?"

Alis nods, too many times. "Yeah, I'm good for now. I promise."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "Well, he, uh... He sent you to do exactly what I would have asked for, then," Cael remarks with a small, wry smile. "Thank you, Alis. I- Things would've ended differently, without you." She takes a harder gulp at the sipping whiskey now - to stop herself from looking too closely at the might-have-been.
    After those words to Alis, her gaze moves to Sara - adding a nod to her as well. Without both of them... She quickly drags her gaze away, looking down at the whiskey, her hands tightening around the glass.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara has no idea if Alis can actually eat or drink, it's not something they've covered in their training, so she offers her glass to the ghostly girl. Teenager or not before death, if she can sip she should get to.

"So... how does Hawaii sound?" She then says completely out of the blue, pulling the conversation away from what Cael isn't ready to face. "One week on the beaches, sipping fruity drinks, get away from the cold of the city?"

Alis takes the glass and looks at it, shrugs then takes a small sip, or at last that's what it she attempts. She has no idea either and then...

"Yes!" The sip worked, followed by. "YUCK!"

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael can't help but snerk at Alis's reaction to the whiskey. "I'll drink your share," she offers - before adding, "We'll get you some mint chip instead. Yeah?" It had always been a favorite of the pair of them - and somehow, just sitting down over a bowl of mint chip with Alis... is just about the most comforting thought she's had in a long time.
    She takes another sip of the whiskey, before turning her attention to Sara's question. "Hawaii?" she repeats. "I, uhh... I've never been. I've never really- I mean, I've been to the beach out here, but..." That's not really the same experience, is it?
    "What the hell do people do in Hawaii? Isn't it all... surfing and the like?" she asks in a dubious tone.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara laughs at Alis' reaction and takes her glass back. "Well, that was something," she offers with a chuckle. "Oooh, mint chip, that's the best kind. I think we actually have some in the freezer, if you ever want to attack it. I'll keep some in there from now on, just in case."

Shifting eyes back to Cael, she gets her phone out of her pocket and pulls up the pictures of Mauna Kea Beach on Kauna?oa Bay, in Hawaii. "Look at this place Cael," she breaths almost excitedly. "Sure, there's surfing and swimming, but there's also luaus, shopping, a whole new culture of people to learn about, making faces at the other tourists, sun bathing, eating everything Samoan. You know Jason Momoa? He's Samoan, hubba, hubba." Okay, that might not be what Cael's interested in, but Sara doesn't really know for certain, so she figured she'd throw it out there.

"There's a lot of possibilities," she then adds, flipping through the various pictures of the area. "And it's not here, in fact it's pretty much the warmest as far away from here place I could think of."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "No. It's not here," Cael agrees, her gaze going to the picture on the phone, and then back to her roommate once more. "Can you just... run off like that, though?" she asks. "You're career... I mean, you're supposed to be in the middle of this case, and no one knows that- I mean, we can't tell the world we have the guy can we? And even if we could - the lead detective doesn't just fuck off after the arrest..." There's a //lot// of work to do after the arrest. Just as much as there was before the arrest.
    "...you can't run off to Hawaii in the middle of a case," she protests.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
The sip now becomes a bit larger as Sara looks to the phone rather than Cael. Alis leans over to look at pictures as well, she's only ever been where Cael is, so this looked like it might be a fun place, but she doesn't say anything, she looks up Sara's face before sitting back again.

"Cael," Sara says quietly, the looks up to Cael again. "This case... it became an NYPD cold case the minute the Justice League Dark became involved. There is no one to arrest, no cult to blame, no logical neat and tidy way to explain what happened. Not one thing that has happened can go into an official report."

She sighs softly, shaking her head. "This isn't the first case like this either, in fact most of the cases I end up with end up with false reports. What's one more? We already know who did it, we know there likely won't be any more murders, and I can call in 'reports'," she makes air quotes. "from Hawaii. I'm pretty sure I'm going to lose my job soon, or get suspended, and I've actually come to accept it."

A smile finally lights on her face and she nods, "Yeah... I really have. The NYPD isn't the only way to help, it's just... what I've always known and done, so if I lose my job, I lose it... and we're going to Hawaii."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "I know none of this stuff can go in the file, but- you have to look like you're still working the case. How do you explain plane tickets to Hawaii?" Cael counters. "I- I can't ask you to do something like that for me, Sara. I can manage here. I've got you, and Alis, and Sam, and Sims," she points out. "I'm- I'll be alright." Somehow. A shiver runs through her, and she lets go of the whiskey with one hand, so she can pull the blankets up towards her neck with the other.
    "I don't want to be part of the reason you lose your job."

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara snorts, giving Cael a 'look', then reaches to adjust the blankets a little for her.

"We're going," she says more firmly. "You need this. /I/ need this. You won't be part of the reason because I'm choosing to do it, you aren't, you're just going with me cause it would be boring without you."

Scooting up the bed a little, she lays her hand on Cael's shoulder, not the one Alis' head it on. "I get that you're worried about me, and I love you for it, but we both need to not be here for a while. The tickets will be in Wade's name, the hotel in his name, I mean he doesn't know it yet, but that's what boyfriends are for, right? Help cover up middle of the month escapes to Hawaii?" She grins broadly. "Look me in the eyes and tell me you want to stay here."

Alis nudges Cael lightly, sliding her arm around her. "You need to go Cael, you really do. Get out of here, get some sun, get sloshed on the beach... I wanna see those beaches too. So say yes, other wise I'll start whining, and Sara will start being all logical, and the you'll be outnumbered."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "I- you know that's not how plane tickets work," Cael mutters quietly. You need your name on it, or you don't get on the plane. You have to show ID. "Unless we somehow get ourselvves a Quinjet, or hire a private plane."
    She lets out a quiet, breathy laugh before she adds, "I don't want to be here. But- I also think it doesn't matter where we are. If this trouble shakes loose again - I don't think it matters where on the planet we are." Her breathing starts to pick up in pace - but she forces herself to slow it, breathing deeply, consciously. Once she has her breathing back under control, she takes another drink of her whiskey.
    "I just don't want you to regret this," she adds quietly. "I mean- there's plenty I regret in my life. You're //guarnateeing// you get fired, Sara... You might as well go hand in your resignation."

Sara Pezzini has posed:
"Cael, I've spent the last two years trying to be the perfect detective while concealing the fact that the world doesn't work the way the rest of the cops think it does." Sara begins, another small sip of the whiskey taken as she removes her hand from Cael's shoulder.

"That got three of my partners killed, because I kept them in the dark and this... " she gestures around like the magic and mystic world is visible or something. "got them." She takes a sharp breath in to keep her emotions in check, because she need to be the strong and logical right now.

"The job doesn't matter," she says bluntly after that moment. "The NYPD will still be there, doing what they can for the normal people who are blessed to have their eyes closed. If I lose my job, so be it. You're more important, it's as simple as that. I'm not making excuses or trying to rationalize insanity here, it's the cold hard facts... you, Cael Becker, are more important to me than the job."

Alis remains silent while Sara is speaking, watching the expressions on her face as she works her way through her decision. It was way over her head, the teenager just couldn't fathom how Sara could lose so much and still just keep going, and then she realized it was because she hadn't... she'd just shoved it down and kept going.

Looking over at Cael now, Alis still doesn't speak, but she does hug her.

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael tries to find a coherent response - any coherent response - but she can't. One simply won't come. The fact that someone, anyone, would be willing to give up something so important to them - for her sake - just doesn't make sense. That's simply not what her life experience has taught her - so she's left gaping, grasping for words that slip through her fingers, and refuse to come until she does the only thing she can do.
    She wraps one arm around Alis, and she starts to cry.
    "I didn't- I didn't want-" she struggles to speak past the sobs. "I didn't want you to find me and have to- to- like the others," she manages to gasp out.
    Somehow, her mind is like a scratched record - constantly skipping back to what she does //not// want to think about.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara sets her glass on the night stand then slides over and wraps her arms around Cael as well, just holding her like Alis was. For a moment she is quiet, just being there for her friend.

"I know," she whispers. "That fear keeps running through you, that you didn't want that, and it didn't happen. Alis got to me, we got to you and it didn't happen Cael, it did not happen."

Alis closes her eyes, adding a whispered, "It'll be alright Cael, you've got a good friend here and me too."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "But then - I did," Cael answers, her voice almost incoherent between the sobs. "I- God, it- it would be so much easier to- to just..." She clings to her friends with one arm, the other still holding tightly to her half-finished glass of whiskey. "He- he was... right about that. It would be easier..." to just let go.
    "Oh, God," she whispers. It would be so much easier - and she could still remember how peaceful it'd felt - accepting her fate.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Refusing to let go, Sara keeps her arms around Cael and rests her head against her friends. It would be easier, she knew that. Life was always so damned complicated, sometimes near impossible. It would be so much easier to just let go, accept death with it was offered, but in the Italian woman's mind... that was giving up.

"In that moment Cael," she whispers, trying to pick her words carefully. "It makes sense that you did, that you believed it would be easier... hell, in that moment it likely would have been easier, but... that's the twisted thinking of that fucker cause it wouldn't be easier."

How do you tell someone that death isn't the answer? That life was worth living despite the nightmare that it had become? Kid gloves, and yet she had to remain true to herself and her thinking.

After a moment of silence, of just holding her, Sara finally says softly, "It would be giving up on life, giving up yourself, giving up on your goals and your dreams, giving up on your friends and the people who love you... still think it's easier?"

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael doesn't respond immediately, she just clings to Alis and Sara with desperation, as she tries to sort out her racing thoughts. How did she explain the peace she felt when she finally gave in? The relief it brought? The certainty, and clarity?
    But that hadn't been her - had it? Had it been?
    "I don't know," she finally gasps out. "I don't know. It felt so- It- it felt so- it felt right. It felt- I- I can't remember ever feeling so- there was peace," she admits.
    "But I don' wanna give up." Giving up is just not part of her nature. "Oh... God, Sara. Alis..."
    Part of what made it all so terrible - was how wonderful it had all felt, and she remembers it all.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara's hold tightens slightly, not clinging... that's what Alis doing. For Sara it was more a case of holding on tightly to remind Cael that she was still in the here and now, in this moment, alive.

"That was the angel Cael," she says quietly. "That is what they do, part of their purpose, to make you /believe/ and accept death. To offer up peace and serenity to remove reality, the reality being the pain. Think for a moment," she pauses, taking a slow breath.

"Think about the fight, how you struggled against it, and then how you had no choice but to give in and accept. That wasn't you, that was /him/."

Alis finally lifts her head, still clinging. "Death isn't peaceful Cael," she says quietly. "Whether you die from something natural like age, or... like I died. There is nothing peaceful about it, and it's not supposed to be. You're supposed to fight tooth and nail to your last breath and /then/ there's peace. He twisted it... if he made it all peaceful first, then he twisted the natural order of it."

Cael Becker has posed:
    "It's all twisted up in my head," Cael admits quietly. "It hurt - but it didn't. I- I wanted to live. And... and I wanted to die. I wanted it so much..." But that wasn't her. That wasn't her. Was it?
    She's making no attempt to meet the eyes of her friends - quite the opposite, as she stares down, and way from them, tears still falling as she clings desperately.
    She's afraid - afraid of what she might do if the memories overwhelm her. Afraid of how easily the angel could influence her again if he ever got free.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
There was no attempt on Sara's part to look at Cael's face, in fact she was resting her head against her friends with her eyes closed to give Cael that escape. She knew just how difficult it was to look someone in the face and admit emotions, any kind of emotions, but the negative ones were the hardest. She was also making sure that Cael would continue to sip the whiskey if she wanted to, because despite what the other's believed, she knew it helped.

"It's twisted in your head because that was the intent," she stated softly, loosening her hold a little in case Cael was ready to be unhugged. "He wanted you to give up, give in, accept because that makes it easier for him and justifies his actions. You know that's not who you are. It's twisted and confused right now, but deep down you know that's not who you are."

Alis uses the edge of the blanket to wipe Cael's cheeks, but other wise she doesn't let go. Sara can let go, Alis ain't doing that. Cael was the one who got to live, that's how she saw it, and the idea that this angel thing had twisted that all up in her sister's head made the ghost angry... but there was no retaliation she could offer. Instead she would just be there to remind Cael of the facts.

"You don't want to die," she states. "Trust me Cael, you don't want to die. Maybe at that moment thanks to that angelic son of a whore you did, but you don't... and you've got the fight in you to keep living, so never give in."

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael isn't drinking from the whiskey - she's crying too hard to manage it. She still clings to the glass - she still wants it, that's for sure, when she can start to get her raging emotions back under some semblence of control. "I- God, I want that peace, though. It felt... it felt..." God, it felt good.
    "That's what scares me. I- I'm scared what I might..."
    What guarantee does she have that she won't seek the 'easy' way out of this pain? Or that the angel might not find another way to exert influence on her? What might she do if her resolve slips?

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Sara sits up slightly to look at Cael, not at her face just at her.

"That you might try to kill yourself?" She asks bluntly. "Is that was you were trying not to say? That you want that peace so badly that you would kill yourself to get it? Do you realize that once your dead you don't /get/ that peace? You've /seen/ what's out there," again she gestures at the room like it's all right there.

"You know about the hells, even if you've never seen them. In the Catholic faith, suicide is a sin and gets you sent to one of those hells." A pause, wrong angle and she knows it, the reality is more obvious. "Alis... you're dead, do you feel at peace?"

Alis squeaks, she had been sitting there saying in her own head, 'Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me...' then Sara went and asked her.

"Uh..." she chews a little at her bottom lip. "There wasn't peace. There was pain of dying and then... nothing. That nothing seemed to devour me, it seemed to last forever and go on and on and on..." she coughs, not wanting to talk about that right now. "And then... there was Cael, and the world around me and no one could see me. There's a lot of ghosts out there, lost and wandering, searching for something that isn't there any more. I got lucky, I had some one I was attached to, or I would have ended up wandering aimlessly until I was just lost."

Cael Becker has posed:
    What response was she looking for? What response was she expecting?
    Honestly, she didn't know. She pulls away now, and abruptly shoots back what's left of the whiskey in her glass. It was obviously that whatever window had opened to allow Cael to open up to her friends - to try to reach out for help - had just abruptly slammed shut. "I know that," is all she says, as she tries to still her sobs, holding her breath between gasping, shaking breaths in an attempt reassert control. She turns away from the two of them, trying to scoot back down into the blankets. "I should sleep."
    She intends to simply lie there staring at the wall. She wouldn't mind never sleeping again - even if she knows how unrealistic that is.

Sara Pezzini has posed:
Perhaps it was everything that had happened, but as Cael pulls away, it was Sara who started to cry. It wasn't sobs, it was just tears that fell from her eyes that she ignored. She fucked up, she knew it, but she wasn't certain how, what she had said, or maybe it was how she said it, she just plain didn't know. She wasn't the best at this sort of thing, obviously, and instead of helping she'd made it worse.

Standing up she grabs her glass off the night stand to finish it off, remaining silent, still ignoring the tears and the ache in her chest that spread through her torso. In her head she repeated the words 'Lock it up Pezzini' over and over again as she moved over to turn off the main light. The night lamps where still on, enough light to see but not blinding like the overhead was.

"Sleep well," she finally says quietly, returning to that place on the floor because now she needed to be away, to collect herself, to shove it all back down. She fucked up and that wasn't something she was going to forgive herself for any time soon.

Alis frowned deeply, she recognized the switch that just flipped. It was the one she used hundreds of times in the past for everyone but Cael, and there it was, flipped on her. She realized in that moment there was a first time for everything, and she didn't like it.

Despite the switch flip, she takes time to get Cael tucked in and comfortable, and even lays down beside her to stare at the ceiling. She was dead, she didn't need to sleep.

Cael Becker has posed:
    Cael stares at the wall across from her - oblivious, in her own misery, to the pain she causes her friends. She tries desperately not to think, not to feel. Life is pain, and torment, and struggle. Death is pain, and torment, and struggle. It all felt to hopeless - and it's a bitter joke to have that promise of peace, that lie, so fresh in her memory.
    There was no winning. ...so what was the point?
    That's the thought on her mind when she finally drifts off to sleep, with her back still turned to her sister, and her friend.