8250/Waffles and mayhem

Waffles and mayhem
Date of Scene:	15 October 2021
Location:	Cafeteria and Bar
Synopsis:	Waffles, coffee, conversation, flirting, and Wade Wilson, AKA Deadpool joins the Brotherhood. Poor H & D.
Cast of Characters:	Raven Darkholme, Clarice Ferguson, Wade Wilson

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Raven Darkholme has posed:
Since China, Mystique has been working her butt off for many, many, MANY reasons, but even she has to eat. Normally she'd have something brought to her room, a luxury available on the asteroid, but since she'd been hiding out for a day or two, it was time to mingle and try not to lose her temper on people.

Waffle bar. Someone to make them, or you can make them yourself. Mystique goes for coffee first, then requests a banana and peanut butter waffle, with chocolate chips and enough whipped cream she could sculpt it into a mountain.

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    Clarice hadn't specifically been planning to run into Mystique when she went into the cafeteria. In fact - it was sheer coincidence that she was stress-eating her own waffle monstrosity already. The thing was covered in chocolate syrup, and chocolate chips, with strawberries and blueberries and - yes. Fresh whipped cream as well. She also has a cup of coffee - which she's dosed with a little whiskey - but she's eating at her food idly as she reads slowly and methodically from a tablet some emails she'd started receiving about the mentorship program since the interview footage went online.

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade Wilson was wandering the halls of the Asteroid as was his lot some of the time. He's wearing his mask, but is otherwise in plainclothes. A rough looking grey hoodie, a black and white striped tee, jeans, boots. As he passes the cafeteria he stops midstep and notices the pair of ladies within. He reverses the midstep and turns his path into the cafe and the diamond of the entire station (in his opinion) the Waffle Bar.

    He catches the attention of the ordering staff and asks for a 'Stroopwafel'first. The blank stare he receives makes him roll his eyes and instead he asks for a 'Hong Kong Egg Waffle'. Another blank stare and a bit of a stammer. He turns and addresses 'someone else' "This is the problem with waffles. No one appreciates just how multicultural a waffel can be. Let's try again, shall we?"

    He turns again to the waitstaff, (who is looking in the direction the red-masked man was talking with a very concerned expression on his face,) and asks, "What about Pizelle?" The poor waitstaff blinks some more in confusion. "Aw, hell with it. Just give me a strawberry and whipped cream Belgium then. Extra strawberries and extra strawberry syrup."

    He turns as the waiter thanks him and moves to sit across the way from Mystique. "You'd think a waffle bar in space would be more accustomed to a variety of exotic waffles" he says settling down in the chair. "Guess not. Heya boss" he says to the blue skinned woman.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique had only just settled herself with her coffee at the table with Clarice. Today was like any other day, when out and about the cobalt wore her white body suit, white thigh high boots and because she missed it, her belt of white smurf skulls. Crossing one leg over the other, she watches Wade mess up the heads of the staff then walk over and sit down.

"If you want the fancy waffles, you talk to Eddie," she points toward the kitchen. "He can make anything, but the waffle bar, it's primary good old fashioned basic waffles."

For a moment she glances back to the staff to make sure they're getting back to work after having their brains melted by culture, then she looks back to Wade. "You know, you don't have to wear that mask here," she offers, then takes a sip of her coffee. "You're our brother and accepted for who you are."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "Hey boss," Clarice greets the woman as she sits down - without looking up from her emails. Nope, she's judging solely by the flash of cobalt blue visible from the corners of her eyes. As she finishes what she's reading, though, she turns off the screen of her tablet, lifting her head to actually offer the woman her attention. "How're you-" she starts, just as Wade slides into a seat at the table as well, prompting her to subtly change the questions, "-doing?" she asks, flashing Mystique a smile.
    Her gaze turns to Wade next, offering the man a nod of greeting before adding, "Well. At the very least - it's hard to eat with the mask on. But - seriously, it's not needed around here. We've got plenty of unusual-looking folks. It's all accepted here."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade looks between the two ladies. "Oh you don't want to see what's going on under here" he says, gesturing to the mask. "Don't get me wrong. You got your fair share of uglies in the Brotherhood: Toad, Blob, Vanisher, Toad, Sauron, Mask, Toad, Random, Toad, Tom Cassidy, Toad, did I mention Toad?" Some of those names might be familiar to the pair of ladies, others very well might not.

    "But this?" he gestures to the mask. "It's been likened to what happens when 'Freddie Kruger facefucked a topographical map of Utah' or 'an avacado that had hate sex with an older, more disgusting avacado.'" Those are both rather disturbing images to bring up at the breakfast table. "So... no. I'll do my best to just shove the waffle against the mask and hope of the battery goodness manages to get in there and save the pair of you the horror of trying to eat with a testicle with teeth."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique sits back in her chair, one leg crossing over the other as her face changes to something no one would want to see. She may not look like two old avacados had sex, but it's still not a pretty sight. Clarice recognizes it immediately, what the cobalt mutant looked like after her irradiation, though thankfully this time there's no pain to go along with it.

Taking a sip of her coffee, one slightly melted brow lifts. "You are our brother," she repeats. "Your appearance doesn't matter, but if you choose to keep the mask on that is entirely your choice. I would however suggest lifting the bottom part to get the waffles into your mouth, trust me, they don't teleport through the material and they are more than worth it."

The young mutant that brings Wade and Mystique's waffles over doesn't so much as blink as Mystique changes, she sets the plates on the table, offers a smile to Wade and Mystique, then makes her way back to the waffle bar.

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "I mean - I've seen Mister Creed after he was set on fire. After her got real close and personal with a rather unhappy bear. After he'd been riddled with more bullets than anyone can count. Oh, and there was that thing with the acid, that once," Clarice remarks easily. "I'm pretty used to it.
    She starts cutting into her waffle, lifting it to her lips as she takes in Mystique's appearance and frowning faintly in response. Seeing Mystique like that was //not// a good memory for her, however, she doesn't comment on it as she takes a bite. "We're happy to have you, you know," she remarks to Wade instead. "You boys seemed to be enjoying yourselves out on that mission. I was only sorry I couldn't join in with the fun."

Wade Wilson has posed:

    Wade blinks at Mystique. "Wow. That's... I mean, I'd still hit it if given the chance but... wow..." He looks between the pair and shrugs before tugging off the mask.

    Underneath the mask he looks... normal. Completley normal. No scars. No burns. No hideousness. He even has a full head of hair. Its cut short, brown, and stylishly mussed. He even has sports a roguish five o'clock shadow. He's rather handsome and if he cleaned himself up he might be rated as one of the 'sexiest men alive by People magazine.'

    He looks to one side to no one in particular and says, "What? You think if I was given a holographic emitter capable of changing my appearance I *wasn't* going to gratuitiously use the thing? Think again. You saw what I did with a time travel device." He holds up his wrist where a strange device rests. It could pass for a watch except for the fact that it has seven different colored lights flickering in a set pattern on it. "This baby is on overclock now."

    He takes a deep breath and looks back at the two women. "You know that *is* better. Is that..." He sniffs. "Lavender in the air? Never smell that with the mask on."

    "Yeah, working with Logan and Victor again was a blast. I *think* Victor won the contest though. By one." He starts to cut into the waffle. "You're not too bad yourself, you know. The way you just... dismantled that one guy? Total props."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique smirks, her visage shifting back to her usual worn face, what most would know as the real her. Cutting off a piece of the waffle, ensuring it has a little of everything, she pokes it in her mouth and starts to chew. In this way she can't comment on what happened with the other team, her mouth was full, it would be rude to talk.

Taking another sip of her coffee, eventually she has to swallow, so instead of talking about China, she looks at the device on Wade's wrist. There is no way to know if he's talking the truth or it's another one of the vast illusions his head comes up with, but she'll play along either way.

"Image inducers are a wonderful thing," she admits. "Help out a great deal, but even still, you do you Wade and remember... no one here gives a fuck what you look like."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    Clarice looks puzzled as the mask comes off to reveal a perfectly normal appearance - though as he comments off to the side, she lets out a quite 'ahh' of undestanding. She gives a shrug of her shoulders, deciding to dismiss the entire issue, and focus on her food instead. If he wasn't comfortable - there was little she could do to convince him otherwise, she imagined.
    "That's actually what my powers were like before I learned to control them. I've shredded a lot of things over the years. I just don't care for seeing kids... used like that. You don't get a pass for that sort of shit."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    "Definitely" Wade says, not stopping. "I wish I could've pulled some of the guys out of the workshop where I was made into... well..." He taps the 'watch' and the illusion drops for a split second. He's not pretty. Wrinkled. Scared. Hairless. The skin over his skull only barely hiding the shape of it. Then the illusion is back up. "That. But... it burned down and I was pretty incapacitated at the time." He shakes his head. "Too many senseless deaths."

    "The kids are working out okay? Some looked to be in pretty bad shape when we got them out." It might seem odd but it appears that Deadpool *was* capable of cordial, non-crazy workshop talk with other people. Even as he devours the over-strawberried waffle before him.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique glances to Clarice for a moment, then looks back to Wade. Apparently the appearance change really has no effect as she just watches it happen and then the image come back. No, he's not pretty by society standards, or any for that matter, but his appearance is him, and to her that's all that matters.

"I got a medical report on every child," she states, sipping at her coffee. "No serious wounds or weaknesses, some were a little malnourished, but over all they are all doing well now. Also, I got a message from a young man calling himself 'Big Dawg', for you Clarice." She looks back to the magenta mutant. "And I quote, "You cool, thanks.""

Now she looks back to Wade. "Those from the lab are off the IVs and starting to wake up. They are the ones with the most health issues, but the magical healer Tara Tsabedze, and Jasmine are both on call to Genosha to help out with them."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "They're in the hands of people whose primary concern, now, is their health and well being. They're going to be alright," Clarice asserts firmly, similarly unaffected by Wade's appearance. When you've seen and done some of the shit she has in her life? A horrifically scarred face is hardly the worst of it.
    The message from 'Big Dawg' gets a 'Ha!' in response, and a large, pleased smile from the magenta-hued woman. "He's cool, too. Job would have been a lot harder without his help. We lucked out." Her expression goes more serious as she asks, "How's Aiguo?" He was the little boy she had carried out - and she was still a little attached to him, even after handing him over to the care of the medical staff.

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade listens and eats more of his waffle. "So now that the fire's been lit in China, is our work there done?" he asks after a particularly large mouthful. "Or do we keep helping them, freedom fighter style? I mean, I'm all for the helping the Rebels, I mean down with the Empire, right?"

    He pauses. "Or is it the First Order these days? Can't ever keep up with that franchise. After 'Return of the Jedi' it just went downhill in my opinion."

    He turns to the side to address the 4th Wall again. "And that friends is how to rekindle the pain of losing the love of your life. Twist that knife Wade, twist it good."

    He turns back to the women and waves a hand. "I just need to know if I need to start calling Victor Chewbacca on missions."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
A few more bites of Mystique's waffle disappear as they're talking, though she doesn't seem all that hungry she is trying to eat because she knows she has to.

"Aiguo?" she repeats, then takes a moment. "Ah, yes. He's actually up and moving around, not a lot but he's a serious little trooper. He already wants to run and play with the other kids, and doesn't seem to remember anything that happened after his parents gave him up."

A woman wanders by to refill coffee pots. She has a coffee pot in each hand, and her tail is holding a basket with cream, sugar, honey, and other coffee condiments. Mystique takes a refill and adds cream to her coffee.

"We are presently funneling supplies into China for the Brotherhood of China to use, enable them to coordinate their objectives across the entire country. We may be asked to assist with their plans, we may also be asked to help train some of them for freedom fighting, as for the most part they are mutants who have been in hiding."

When Wade speaks to the 4th Wall, she just waits. No idea why he does that, but she's been warned he does it and again, it's a part of him so she accepts. Once he looks back however, the idea of calling Victor, Chewbacca, she laughs.

"I would like to think we're more like the Rebel Alliance, so by all means, call Victor Chewbacca, but please... let me be there when it happens."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "Good," Clarice answers - a broad smile growing on her features as Mystique shares the report on the boy. "I'm glad to hear that. I hoped- well. He's young enough, I thought he'd do alright. I hope he can be reunited with his family somehow - or find a foster family or something." She takes a sip of her coffee, which she's been nursing slowly - but doesn't take any refill at the moment.
    She studies Wade with puzzled curiosity before suddenly exclaiming, "Oh! You're talking about //Star Wars//. Chewbacca was the furry one." At least she gets it this time - as compared to when they were discussing Lord of the Rings.
    "I'm sure we'll all have plenty of chances to revisit China. That government's not one to just cave under pressure. You know?"

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade snaps his finger at Clarice. "Got it in one this time around. Good for you!" he says with a bright, beaming smile that lights up the entire fake-face he's wearing. "Speaking of... we need to enhance your movie knowledge. The Lord of the Rings Trilogy is a visual masterpiece even with all the content cut from the books."

    "As a complete aside... I don't know your name, do I?" he asks. "I know you as Blink, and if that is your name, amazing... but to me it sounds like Blink is to you what Deadpool is to me." He stuffs more waffle in his mouth and swallows, chasing it with some coffee. "Codenames and all to keep our identities a secret to the normies... or catchy phrases for the masses who read our stories to hook into and use when talking to their peers. Eitherway. Codenames."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique stirs her coffee before picking it up again. "There are several mutants in China who are getting transported to Genosha, but there are hundreds who are choosing to stay and fight for their rights in their country. We'll be back," she nods in confirmation. "We have the entire trilogy in the bar, need to have a movie night and let Wade here MST3K it."

In regards to Clarice's name, she leaves that for her to give or not. "I prefer Mystique for business, but lately have been using Raven in social settings," she offers to Wade regarding herself.

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "MST3K it?" Clarice repeats in bafflement - looking between the pair. She doesn't expect to live in confusion for long.
    "Oh!" she says - letting out a quiet laugh as Wade comments on her name. "Yeah, sorry - it's a codename. Though I don't mind answering to it. My real name's Clarice. Not sure how much of a 'secret' that really is - when you're this distinctive," she gestures to herself, "And you travel around in the company of people like Mystique, and Magneto... well. Anonymity is not really a thing - you know?"

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade stares at Clarice. "If I make a comment about fava beans and a bottle of chianti, you're not going to get it so I will save it and add Silence of the Lambs to the list of movies we need to have you watch."

    He finishes off his waffle, (man eats *fast,*) and sips from his coffee. "Or hell, add the entire Hannibal trilogy as well. Anthony Hopkins is a treasure of an actor. Love him."

    He looks at Mystique. "I like Raven. It's... got more... can I say 'sex appeal' without getting hit with a call to HR for sexual harrassment?" he asks, nevermind the fact that posing it as a question did nothing to hide his opinion. "For me Deadpool is what most know me by. Wade is for those in the inner circle, which coincidentally now involves the Brotherhood, of all things. It's not X-Force but I like it."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    "Is that why people keep saying that?!" Clarice abruptly interjects, staring at Wade. "There's a //movie//?" It makes so much sense!

Raven Darkholme has posed:
One brow lifts slightly as once again, Wade tries a pick up line. Honestly, if she wasn't seeing and madly in love with Lydia, she could go for a long and violent romp in the hay with a man about now...

"Thank you," she offers with a smile and that one raised brow. "Raven is my actual name, I just rarely use it any more. In my attempt to embrace humanity, my own, not actual humans..." she twitches slightly. "I have started using it again. Am I okay to call you Wade? I should have asked before doing do, though honestly if you wanted to hate me for it, go right a head." A smile plays over her lips, before she she takes another sip of her coffee.

"I'm not missing your lines, and at another time Wade," see, she really doesn't care. "We'd already be in my room testing how many positions you know, but I am seeing Lydia, and really love her, so I'm being faithful and monogamous, even if that's not my usual style."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    Still unclear about what 'MST3K' means, Clarice lapses into silence for a moment, listening to the banter between Mystique and Wade as she polishes off the last of her waffles, pushing the plate away. "Oh - you've reminded me. I intend to ask Mister Creed if he'd be willing to be a donor. I figure that could fix a lot of our supply problem right there - if he's willing," she offers a bit cryptically, taking a sip from her coffee.
    If Mystique wants to clarify things for Wade - that's her choice. But Clarice sees no reason to talk openly about Lydia's current dilemma with someone outside their 'family' - as it were.

Wade Wilson has posed:
     "It is, Clarice" Wade answers to her question. He can't help but put some extra esses at the end of the woman's name. "And when we watch it... you will understand all the better why you *don't* want people equating you to the character." He grins.

    Mystique (or Raven, if you will) gets a show of hands in a pacifying gesture and a nod. "I get it. I do. I'm still probably going to comment because... well..." He gives her the eyebrow waggle that he seems to think should convey everything. "Also, Dance Card's always open if you ever want to give me this Test." He winks. He has a good wink.

    At the mention of donors he blinks between them. "Wait... you're going to have Sabretooth be a donor?" He looks appaled and gestures to his (completely normal) face. "This ugly mug is not genetic, I assure you." Inadvertent self-burn there. "If you need a donor, I've got the stuff you need." He is *obviously* misunderstanding what they're talking about. Hopefully.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique almost spits out her coffee at Wade's comment and misunderstanding which kind of donor they were talking about. She manages not to spit coffee anywhere and swallow, then sets the cup down on the table.

"Okay..." she breaths, patting her chest. "One, wrong kind of donor, we don't need any sperm at this time Wade, but thank you so much for offering. Two, Creed is like a father to Clarice, so that sort of thinking... ew." She puts emphasis on the ew.

"We'll move to three, you're always welcome to comment because..." she gestures to herself. "come on. I'm hot as fuck and I know it. I'd be insulted if you /didn't/ comment." Poor Clarice, really, she has to put up with this shit all the time.

"And finally four, MST3K is a show where there are commentators who make funny comments all through the movie, which are usually very accurate about the movie."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    Clarice lets out a quiet groan at Wade's misinterpretation of her statement, but she smiles with amusement - before her expression turns more speculative. "You have a healing factor as well, don't you?" she remarks. Looking back to Mystique, she shrugs her shoulders, adding, "I mean - if he really wants to donate..."
    Finishing off the last of her coffee she adds, "Speaking of Mister Creed - I'm supposed to be meeting him in the training room in an hour, and I have some emails to get done first, so..." She rises to her feet, picking up her tablet.

Wade Wilson has posed:

    Wade gives the woman a salute as she leave. "I do have a healing factor. It's possible the same as or better than Logan and Victor's. We've never been keen on finding out which is better." He pauses and sips his coffee. "Actually. Scratch that. We have been *keen* on it, just never actually tested it. But I was blasted into the sun and came back just fine so that's got to count for *something.* No ill effects for atomization." He beams. He has to be joking, right? Right?

    He then looks at Mystique (he can't figure out if he wants to call her Raven more or not. There could be confusion if he ever met the Titans... he tables it for now). "If you're not talking about that, and... yeah, if Victor is like a father to her, ew... what *are* you talking about?"

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique lifts her hand to pause Clarice from her escape. "Don't talk to Creed about it yet please," she states. "I want to make sure Lydia's comfortable with the information getting out there before anyone else knows. I'll talk to her and text you, when I get done eating, should be during your training so check your phone."

That explains why she isn't sharing more information with Wade just yet, she doesn't want to let the fangy cat out of the bag. Not her place, until she's talked to Lydia about it. She's been trying to internalize her own issues over it, and apparently she's doing a very good job of it at none of it showed.

Now she looks back to Wade. "Not my place to say honestly, I don't know how my girlfriend feels about sharing the information just yet. I honestly don't think she'll care, but since it's my fault, I'm not ready to piss her off about it in case she doesn't want it talked about."

Clarice Ferguson has posed:
    Clarice pauses to give Mystique a 'who do you think you're talking to?' look. "Already talked about the notion with her, boss - in regards to Mister Creed, anyways. But if you still want me to hold off - sure," she agrees. Teasingly, she blows a kiss towards the table - it's a bit unclear who it's aimed at, taking a few backwards steps before she spins on her heel and walks out.

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade watches Clarice go. He's never going to call her anything else now, it's too easy to associate her with the FBI profiler from the book and movie. He smiles and taps at the "watch" at his wrist. The illusion of Ryan Reynolds disappears and is replaced with Wade as he naturally looks. "Say no more" he says to Mystique. "My lips are sealed. Though, not literally. Been there, done that, got the action figure, don't want to do it again." He shudders.

    After taking another sip of his coffee and flagging a waitress down for a refill he leans back. "You'd really go twenty, thirty, sixty rounds with this" he gestures to his face, "if you weren't already engaged, huh?" he asked. A smirk. "Or would you have me throw on the face of the Last True Character Actor of our time for the arrangement?"

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique sits forward, studying Wade's real face. She gets it, how other people would look and what they would see, but to her eyes, she's merely sees a beautiful mutant. Perhaps it's from all the years of fighting for mutants rights, for defending people like Toad, for standing up against haters for the right to exist as they are. Perhaps it is also that she is blue, and considered ugly by humans as well.

"Yes," she finally says bluntly, offering a smile. "This is you, not some image, not a fake, the real you and to me, that's more beautiful than anything, or any face you put on. Perception, society, the way people /think/ others are supposed... aren't you sick of playing their games?"

Picking her coffee back up she sits back again. "I know I got tired of it, tired of pretending to be human in a world that hates me simply because I'm not human, and neither are you. You Wade, are a mutant. That world that you pretend to be a part of, fuck them. Some day the world will accept us for who and what we are, in the mean time we must accept each other, and there is Genosha."

Wade Wilson has posed:

    "Oh, trust me, you don't have to ask me about not pretending to be in *any* society," Wade replies with a laugh. "I stopped playing by human rules even before I got 'Abraham Lincoln in a Housefire-ed.'" He shrugs. "I think being diagnosed with cancerous *everything* helped. After you're told 'You're going to die very soon' all the rules of society tend to go out the window." He waits for the attractive and tailed woman to fill his coffee cup and gives her a thanks before picking it up.

    "And yeah, I think I get it. We're all sick and tired of being treated as *less than* when... truth be told, if you want to get down to it, we're actually *more* than human."

    He stops and addresses his invisible audience. "Though, there's a lot to be said about mutation as being a positive or negative effect. But I'm not a biologist. I can't even claim I've played one on TV. I'm pretty sure that's the whole message that the comics are trying to tell with the X-Men though. At least, that's what I got out of it."

    He looks back to Raven (mixing it up, aha!) and continues. "But I don't get why *you'd* be seen as less. You're gorgeous. I mean, sure you skin is blue, your eyes yellow, but... I mean aside from that? You've got *everything* going for you. Flawless figure. The ability to look like anyone and anything. Not to mention your skills at the more violent acts." He leans back and gestures. "Almost every actress they've gotten to play you in the movies have been bombshells."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
This is the part where Mystique has to take a few minutes in an attempt to follow his insanity. Sure, it was confusing as hell to try and grasp at what he's talking about, movies with her in them, but she knows it's all part of that imaginary world that Wade exists in. On top of everything, she also knew better than to poke at it or acknowledge it, the last thing she needed was him offering to seek actresses like some casting director.

"They hate me because I'm an obvious mutant Wade, no other reason." She answered, focusing on that part of the conversation, rather than the movies. "They hate me because I used to murderer "innocent"," air quotes included with the hand not holding the coffee cup. "people for mutant rights. They hate me because I dare not only to exist but to demand of them that they see us, acknowledge us, and let us be free."

Setting the coffee back down, she slides her chair around so she is closer to him, but not all up in his space either. She wanted to talk a little more quietly, no need to announce everything to the entire room, and truth be told, people were looking and listening, that's what happens when Mystique is out and about, and talking.

"Before Magneto freed Genosha, the fight was longer, harder, bloodier, as mutants sought a place to be free. Now the fight has changed, from seeking a place to call our own, to making the humans stop treating us like third class citizens.... and humans still hate me, they will always hate me, no matter how hawt my body is or how good my skills are. My mutation scares the ever living hell out of people."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    "A damn shame" Wade says, joinign her conspiratorial tone. "But I get it. Last time I accidentally sliced my hand off--and it was an accident; I was trying to break free of some handcuffs and ended up compound shattering the bone, it just had to go. Anyway, point is, last time I sliced my hand off and started spraying blood everywhere there were women and men screaming and I got shot a few times as I evaded the police. You'd think with woke culture we'd be part of the flag brigade. But even the humans there don't treat us with inclusivity, do they?"

    He sips more of the coffee. "Is that why you sought me out? Because I'm good with a blade and can withstand nearly anything short of universal heat death? If that is it, I don't blame you." He leans forward, maybe getting up in her space just a touch. "I've killed my fair share of people, human and otherwise."

    "Hell Francis--the guy who *made* me a mutant in at least one universe--got a bullet in the brainpan because he was forcing people to become mutants and then slaves." He pauses to think for a moment. "Actually, he got a bullet because he couldn't fix my face, but... I was more superficial then." He waves a hand dismissively. "What I'm saying is that mutant equality is high on my priority if it stops some sick fuck from making more things like me."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique sifted through the insanity and found the tidbits, but more importantly the direct question of why she sought him out.

"I sought you out for three reasons, Wade. One, you're damn good with a blade, you can be quick and clean when you need to be, or you can instill fear if that's the goal." She takes a sip of her coffee again, and now that she chair where she wants it, sits back to cross right leg over left. "Two, your healing factor is impressive. Sure, we have Victor, and if you want terror, Victor is the go to, but if you want subtle fear..." She offers him a smile.

"And three, probably the most important one really, I've seen you around, seen you in action, but always got the impression you were alone out there. No one, not a single mutant, should ever be alone. I don't care if you go around murdering hundreds of gang-bangers, stabbing up buildings, terrorizing criminal types... more power to you, but you shouldn't have to be alone at the end of the night."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade looks at the cobalt woman next to him for a long moment, he didn't hide the fact that he watched her legs as she shfited one over the other. He was taking in her words. Then he addresses the madness of mind once more. "Shit. She's got my balls in her hand doesn't she? And not in the fun way that says she's going to make me beg for her to squeeze harder, either."

    He sighs and looks back at her. "Yeah. You've got my number don't you?" he asks. "I... am alone. More here than other places. But it's been a pretty lonely life for The Merc With a Mouth. I'm definitely not suited for the X-Men--such a sexist name, really get with the times, ambulatory Mr. Clean--and I don't really have the clout to form my own crew: like X-Force, here and now."

    He holds up a preemptive forestalling hand. "I know it's derivative, but I had to go gender neutral and it was the best I could come up with on short notice." Like a switch he goes back to the first topic. "I think that's part of why I decided to join up here." He looks around the cafeteria and the other mutants in attendance. "Even on a probationary level it's better than anything else I could've done in this world."

    "Speaking of" he says, leaning in again, "Is there any sort of initation ceremony to fully join? I've seen what you're doing and you're less Mutant Al-Qaeda and more Mutant Lives Matter... I can get down with that. So bring on the twenty five virginal mutants to anoint my naked body in the oils of volatile activism." He grins at the white-clad woman. "That's my hope for the intiation ceremony. Purely suggestive, you don't have to go that far." A beat. "Five should be plenty."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique manages to not laugh, though she does offer a smile to him. That ramble was the best one yet, so much in it that made sense, including the fact she had his balls in her hand... made sense, though not true. He'd know when she did.

"We used to be Mutant Al-Qaeda," she admits with that smile. "It failed, and kept failing and will always fail because fear begets fear. Now we are trying a new way, as you put it, Mutant Lives Matter." Yes, she knew where that was from, don't touch it any more than that.

"Full membership requires the following things. One, you understand that if I say jump, you do it. You can ask me later why I had you jump, but when I say it, you do it without question. I always have a reason."

She slides her plate over, half the waffle still there, and picks at it a little. "Two, mutants do not harm mutants... unless they are trying to kill you, that is another matter entirely. However, in general, we try not to harm one another, if there is another way to stop them from hurting you, go for that first, if it fails, protect yourself."

Now the plate gets slid to him, in case he's interested in finishing is as she is not. "And finally three, Magneto is still around, still on the asteroid. It is his home, and if he decides that something needs to be done or wants something done and demands it... we do it. I lead day to day, missions, pretty much everything, right up to the point that Magneto decides to step in and take that leadership. Usually, for this or that thing, then it returns to me. And lastly, the most obvious one, only mutants may be members."

Resting her hands in her lap, she watches his face. "I could probably arrange five girls, can't promise they'll be virgins, but it would be one hellova entertaining night."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade wasn't one to say not to food. Having the lifestyle he tended to have required a LOT of calories. He takes the offered plate and smiles at the woman. "Alright then. I can do all that. I'm in."

    "Listen to you and Magneto: easy. I would rather not have the blood ripped from my body--thankyouverymuch. No killing mutants unless in self-defense of myself or--I assume--another mutant. Go for nonlethal methods first and foremost with our own people." He nods. "And only our people can be members. No worries there. I might trek with non-mutants from time to time." His expression turns nostalgic. "Even married one in one iteration, but that might change with the inclusion into the MCU. Never know where there going with that. But I will keep Brotherhood business simply Brotherhood business."

    He pauses. "You sure you don't mind the name? I mean, Fellowship is a bit less 'YMCA.'" He shrugs and moves on without waiting for a reply. "As for the girls? If that is truly a perk can I ask that they not be camera shy? I can promise you'll get a copy." He winks to emphasize the point. Even looking like an extra for the California Raisins who went on a bender, he had a nice wink.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Looking the picture of perfect poise, the way she sits with her leg crossed, Mystique still can't help but be amused by Wade. He got the rules down, rambled a bit more in his insanity, then made a perfectly reasonable request.

"For the night Wade, they can be whatever you want them to be," she offers as she picks up her coffee cup. "You want photogenic, you get photogenic. We take care of our members."

After a pause there, she considers something then adds, "I personally do not like humans, but a few here and there have proven themselves, so I cannot say I dislike all humans, just most of them. Who you work and run with is also up to you, I only ask that you keep Brotherhood business to yourself. I didn't name the group," she snorts. "Magneto did, and I won't be the one to go, 'Oh by the way Erik, the name of the organization you started is chauvinistic.' as I also prefer not to piss him off."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    "Yeah I feel you, guy has power with a capital P" Wade replies. "Name is what it is then. I suppose with him and Xavier being school pals their naming conventions followed the same rules. Ce la vie." He tore into the waffle for a moment, almost finishing it off.

    "I really missed out didn't I? If I had joined up sooner, I might've had *you* as one of the five to 'initiate' me into the group, eh?" He leans back and sips his coffee. He *did* say he wasn't going to stop making comments about the desirability of the woman next to him. And she didn't seem to mind one bit.

    "Missions" he says, apropo of nothing. "How often do we get them? I take it big operations like China are not the norm. But... ballpark for that sort of thing?"

    It could be jarring how quickly he could go from manic to serious. It was a testament to his conversation partner that she was able to keep up so well with the lunatic parade that was his thought processes.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique was accustomed to dealing with five things at once, while on the phone and typing on her computer... the quickness with which Wade shifted gears in his head was nothing to her.

"Old pals," she repeats, in regards to Erik and Charles. She still wasn't sure how or why, though if anyone had more details than she did, they would have been living in Erik's pocket at the time.

"I would never have been part of the initiation group," she then says plainly with a playful grin dancing over her features. "I would have waited until they left, then tied you to the bed for a few hours of fun, but never would I be part of that group. I'm better than that."

Now she takes a sip of her coffee and moves right on to the next subject. "The mission with China was in fact not the norm, though it will be at the top of the list until such time as they no longer need our assistance. Right now we are still running patrols in Bushwick, and training the locals to run those patrols for themselves. We are cleaning up the gangs there, not stopping them from making a living, but making sure they know that harming other mutants to do that is not acceptable. Let's see..." she pauses to check her mental list.

"We have the mentor program for the orphans in Genosha, they need adult mutants to offer some time to them... hundreds of children, never enough adults interested. As for all out missions... they are rarer these days, but tend to come up last minute without much warning. Preplanned things are of course possible, but I also give notice for those." There is another pause while she checks things off the list. "There are always numerous balls in the air around here, small missions going on with various members, but the larger ones... I can't really give you a definite time line one. One that will come up is, if I ever find the good Reverend Franklin Jeffery Sinclair, former member of the Genoshan government before Magneto freed it, mutant torturing and manipulating bastard that will die by Clarice's hands, or my own."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Mystique's dismissal of Wade's suggestion is met at first with dismay but then with increased interest at the mention of her own involvement in such an encounte piques his imagination to running. But then it's back to business. "Alright. So currently small scale missions abound, training and setting the law in Bushwick," he too is ticking off fingers as he repeats the current operations. "Assisting the Chinese resistance force, and helping the kids from that area. And..."

    He pulls a phone from his pocket. It's a newer model with a bright pink and black Hello Kitty hardcase. "Franklin Jefferey Sinclair..." he mutters as he types the name into his phone. "If I ever get contacted to take him out, I'll let you know so you can get first dibs. I'm not going to steal your thunder when you got a personal stake in it."

    He puts the phone to sleep and stuffs it in his pocket. "You'd be surprised how many random people out there want important figures assassinated." He pauses. "Okay, maybe you wouldn't be surprised. But it might come up, you never know."

    "I'm not the best with kids" he says with a uncomfortable face. "Saving them, sure. But often enough kids find me equal parts funny and terrifying. So I probably can't help in the babysitting department. But is there anything currently you want me to be looking into?"

    He *is* a mercenary and thus is more suited to activity than the idle wait of a soldier.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
As the lovely mutant with the tail goes by, Mystique gets a little more coffee added to her cup, and once again a little cream goes in with it. Sitting forward she collects her spoon to stir, two light taps on the edge of the cup, and finally it gets laid on the napkin.

"Every once in a while, Clarice plans a murdering spree in countries other than the US." She lift the cup to her lips for a sip. "I think you've already been on one, and I got a feeling with everything that's happening she'll be planning another very soon. I'll make sure you get an invite, and of course you get paid for it as it is a Merc job, and not just Brotherhood."

Gear switch to other possibilities, "Are you just a straight out hack and slash, remove the target sort? I don't know your full dossier of talents, merely that you are an expert at murder. There are only so many people I want murdered after all."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade shakes his head. "Oh no. I can do any number of things you need" Wade replies his demeanor businesslike once more. He holds up a finger. "Retreival. Should you need the target alive. I can easily see that a target is acquired, extracted, and provided to you and yours intact enough to accomodate a number of tasks."

    The single digit increaes to two. "Message deliver. Should you require a target to receive a message be it a deterent from further interaction (aka The Restraining Order) or a clandestined meeting (aka The Dropoff) I can ensure message is delivered in a timely manner. And that target understands that the message is of utmost importance."

    Another finger joins the duo, bringing it to three. "Extermination. I can eliminate a target in a variety of ways. Special forces training received before I became what you see now has equipped me with the skills and talents necessisary to be an absolute machine. Stealth, direct confrontation, or any manner in between. If you need something dead. I will see that it is elimnated."

    He lowers his hand and takes up his coffee once more. "Answer your question?" he asks with a smile. Despite the nature of his skin, his teeth are astonishingly white and straight. It seems the horrible cancer didn't extend to dental.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
A slow nod is offered while another sip is taken then Mystique sets the cup down.

"Answers all the question," she replies, once again looking the man over. "Seems you're the whole package Wade, able to do it all and look badass with a sword while doing it."

Pulling her phone from her pocket, she types in a few things, notes most likely about him, then the phone goes back into the top of her boot, with at least one gun right beside it.

"I may actually have a few small tasks for you coming up," she hmms, her expression going into one of those 'I have an idea' sort of expressions. "Just have to check a few things, and then I'll know if a certain someone might need a little reminder or two..." she trails off there to take another sip of coffee.

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade sets his coffee down. "I don't know if I would put it that way..." He *might* be blushing from the woman's compliments. "But I am at your service, should you need it. I want to further the efforts of yours and the Brotherhood's."

    "The faster we make a statement, the faster people will learn that we mean business." He nods at the cobalt skinned woman. "I like being used."

    He pauses and seems to consider his words and frowns. "Another self-burn there, isn't it?" He sighs. "I like being *useful.* That's the better way to put it." A shake of his head and some of his composure returns. "No. You know what? I like being used, too! So yeah. Use me for anything you need, Raven." He used her name directly! "I welcome it."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique's expression slips right back to that playful smiles, a slight wiggle of her brows and then she licks her lips.

"Well then Wade, prepared to be used, but not abused, unless you're into that," another brow wiggle and she takes a sip of her coffee. "I like that you're eager, that bodes well for you... alright, I've assigned you a room in the living quarter hall. It will require a you speak to it to confirm your voice pattern, I /strongly/ urge you to follow the instructions it will offer for what to say, but if you choose to go off script, I'll get someone to fix it and you can sleep in the hall in the mean time." No mincing words with that one, H & D do not like things fucked with in their department and all the electronics and security are their department.

"You'll also get a Brotherhood phone, which will allow you to call up to the asteroid, and if you're really nice, it will let you call me directly."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade's own playful smile returns. "Ooh. Direct line to the boss. I like that perk. I'll be sure to be really nice, then." He covers his cup as the tailed waitress comes by for another refill, seems he's had enough coffee to satisfy his desires. "I think we can work well together. I truly do."

    His madness takes over and he addresses the 4th Wall again. "Things are looking up, Wade. Sure you're not getting to sleep with the beautiful boss, but that's what specialty order body pillows are for. This is more important. A home. Been a long time since you've had one of those, hasn't it?"

    Addressing Mystique as if he hadn't just infered he planned to order a pillow with her likeness on it he continues. "I can work with security and play by their rules." He sobers and sits up straight. "Thank you. I really mean it, Raven. It means a lot to me that you're this... welcoming and accomodating. I had all but given up on being a part of something or having... a family like this. You've proved me wrong. It's..." He touches at the corners of his eyes. "Oh... getting a bit misty eyed, aren't I?"

Raven Darkholme has posed:
The smile offered is genuine, real, and soft. Mystique understands perhaps a little too well what Wade is feeling misty eyed or not. She spent a long time alone before Magneto found her.

"Twenty years ago, would likely have told you join or don't join," she says plainly. "But I've been where you were, and you never have to go back to it. Even if you decide you don't really want to be a part of the Brotherhood, if it turns out that isn't your thing, this is still a home for you. We mutants have to take care of each other."

The waitress comes back by and hands Mystique a small box, which she then offers to Wade. "New phone. I love when H & D are listening in on my CONVERSATION!" the last word is aimed at the camera above the door of the cafeteria. "They get bored."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade takes the box. "Oh... this is a dangerous item you've handed me" he says a mischievous glint coming into his eyes. He too glances at the camera above the door. "Hope the boys in H & D are open minded." Oh no, what has Mystique put upon H & D giving them an open line to Wade Wilson's life?

    "Twenty years ago I might've told you to shove off and taken the loner road. I was a grittier and more cynical person back then. Golden-age Deadpool was a sign of its time, that's for sure." He had to be in his mid-teens twenty years ago, what was he talking about?

    "But things have changed and I've gone through a few phases since then. More about family these days. About belonging. It's hard to see under all this scar tissue and cancerous growths," he taps at his chest, "but DP's got a sentimental heart these days."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Still looking at the camera, Mystique offers a mischievous smile, then turns that smile on Wade.

"H & D are a set of twins that run everything computerized on the asteroid," she explains, before finishing off her coffee. "They get bored because they rarely leave. They are the main frame, literally, that keeps everything working. Entertain them Wade," she gestures to the phone. "Let them live vicariously through you."

Yes, she was well aware what she was saying and doing. Perhaps it was some sort of punishment, or perhaps H & D really were that bored, either way she just siced Deadpool on them.

"For now however, I need to get back and check on the situation in China, and you need to go introduce yourself to your new room."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    Wade nods. "I hear you loud and clear, ma'am" he replies with a grin to the phone. "I will ensure their boredom is alieviated." He rises from the table and offers his hand to the cobalt skinned woman to help her rise from her seat. It seems the Merc with a Mouth has a romantic and chivalrous side to him as well.

    "Oh... one more thing" he asks. "Hypothetically, say I wanted to paint the walls of my room psychodelic pink... who would I speak to for the permission to do so?" There is another mischievous look. "Hypothetically..."

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Although she is more than capable of standing on her own, Mystique takes the offered hand and allows Wade to 'assist' her. She's not above being a lady or at least acting like one at times.

"Hypothetically?" She repeats with a sort of questioning sound to it. "Hypothetically, no one. The room is yours to decorate as you want. You can't remove any walls, only Magneto knows which walls are support, etc. but if you want to paint your room with pin stripes in green and purple, put in a disco ball, and turn your stereo up to 20... by all means. The rooms are sound proof, no one will hear H & D scream."

Wade Wilson has posed:
    "Woooonnnnderfullll" Wade replies extravagantly, giving another wicked grin to the camera and releasing the woman's hand. "I hope to be done by the time you return then. Thank you so much, Mystique. Until you need me." With that, he bows and skips--yes Deadpool skips--out of the cafeteria.

Raven Darkholme has posed:
Mystique nods, "Of course Wade, your phone will ring soon."

Lifting one brow as she watches the man skip from the room, her eyes shift back to the camera above the sliding door. "And now you see what happens when you don't follow orders and listen in on my conversations, I hope you both enjoy." She offers a little wave, then departs the cafeteria herself.

Somewhere on the asteroid, in a large room filled with the mainframe computer, a set of twins stares blankly into space, there eyes completely white with no sign of pupils.

"H, did she just..." D asks quietly.

H nods with a sigh, "Yep, she did."

And that was the day Deadpool was inflicted on the twins.