19560/Dude, Where's My Milano

Dude, Where's My Milano
Date of Scene:	05 December 2024
Location:	LAS VEGAS
Synopsis:	The Milano is back, baby! Now the Guardians just need to learn how to keep up with it.
Cast of Characters:	Peter Quill, Rocket, Carol Danvers, Mary Bromfield, Amy Winston

---

Peter Quill has posed:
Now Playing: Eye of the Tiger - Survivor

The Guardians of the Galaxy have been stuck on Earth since the destruction of their beloved ship: The Milano. There has been quite a push for this to no longer be a thing considering the fact that The Milano meant so much to a couple of the members. One of which obtained an incredible idea from the more empathic members of the team: A Montage.

And that's what has been happening for entirety of this song. Peter and Rocket have been tag teaming the rebuilding (and upgrading) of The Milano with a little help from their friends and allies and Sylvester Stallone. It has been an incredible journey but their combined skills (and one epic song) have made the montage so deliciously powerful that the process was mostly painless. Thankfully, even Earth had some pretty decent tech to use to get the ship back up and running.

Ladies and Gentlemen: The Milano is back in business. And it's a good thing too. Because the song's ending right about here.

Cut To: Las Vegas - Now

The Celebration Suite is a complete and total mess. Nothing is where it is supposed to be. Couches and beds are upside down. Graffiti is all over the place. The room is filled with feathers, chocolate sauce, Twizzlers /and/ Red Vines, bubbles, bibles, miracle bras, cat litter and two llamas -- just to start. There are at least a dozen passed out Terrans in various locations in the oversized suite and it sounds like the bathroom is probably flooded --- or is that the broken aquarium? Either way, six tornados and a hurricane have hit this place.

From deep within the depths of this mess, the wrist of Peter Quill grabs hold of something stationary. A broken handcuff still attached to it as he pulls himself up and out of a pile of string cheese, flower petals and french fries. He groans the classic 'hangover' groan as he attempts to get his vision to focus in the midst of all this post-chaos. But that's going to take him a bit...

Rocket has posed:
THEN-
RISING UP

    BACK ON THE STREET!

Rocket arguing with Quill about the exact specifications to make the Milano flight ready.

TOOK MY TIME!

Rocket hanging upside down from one of Groot's extended arms beneath the Milano, welding a section of plating into place.

TOOK MY CHANCES!

Obviously the sweet ass sound system has to be upgraded. Now there's thousands of tunes loaded into a compact disc changer. Rocket connects some wires, gets zapped... and sucks on the ends of his digits.

NOW I'M BACK ON MY FEET!

Peter and Rocket jabbing fingers into each other's chest about where to hang the fuzzy dice while Drax stands off in the corner eating zarg nuts. Very slowly. (which is why we wont see him for the rest of the scene)

JUST A MAN WITH A WILL TO SURVIVE!

Mary and Carol use their combined powers to weld a satelite that Rocket 'swear to god above' they need. The Milano is now a trailer.

NOW-

The echo of Eye of the tiger sounds so far away through the haze of semi-lucidity Rocket's hunger over head.. It sounds hazy and .. muffled? Why does it sound m- GASP! The soaked Raccoon pops out of the jacuzzi bathtub in a ankle deep in soapy, toilet paper soaked, yellow/green/blue half inflated beachball floating, bathroom. Both clawed hand rub at the domino mask he's got half covering his snout and immediately regrets touching his head. It feels like someone ran a bolt directly between his eyes.

"Get off me..." He says this to a goose.

There's a god damn goose.

And shoves it away, honking. To fly out the smashed window where half a grand piano is only barely hanging on for dear life by the twisted curtains wrapped around two of the legs as if someone suspended it there on purpose. Squinty, beady, black eyes peer around.. then down.

At his half torn tuxedo.

A tiny little Raccoon sized tuxedo.

Then at the human lady in a white wedding dress passed out on the toilet.

"QUILL!"

Carol Danvers has posed:
It's not like Carol meant to let loose during the celebration party. Really, with her recent co-invention of PUNCH CLUB alongside the spectacular She-Hulk, she was absolutely positive she could celebrate one little spaceship repair/rescue in Vegas without any trouble.

At least as consciousness returns, and she realizes she's dressed in a tuxedo, with a lampshade on her head like a hat... she's pretty sure that was her plan.

She also vaguely recalls something about how 'Pianos are the spaceships of the musical world'.

And while she shields her eyes from the light of... well, from pretty much any light (Difficult, when your powers make you glow) she groans out and mumbles.

"This is Quill's fault. All Quill's fault. It couldn't be anyone else's. I'm an _Avenger_."

Her head flops back with another groan. At least she's in a tuxedo. She can't keep coming up with new costume and symbol combos when the press piles on her.

Mary Bromfield has posed:
There was a quiet groan from an improvised fort of couch cushions, with a curtain rod standing upright there with a pillowcase proudly proclaiming that it was, in fact, "FORT KICKASS." Slowly, carefully, Mary picked herself up and peered out at the carnage of the celebration suite. "Um, whoa."

Then there's a soft moan from within the fort, and Mary blushes... because, well, it didn't come from /her/, and some memories are starting to come back of what was happening the night prior.

Definitely Quill's fault. Absolutely.

Peter Quill has posed:
"... why is everybody saying my name?"

Quill, for what its worth, is trying to get up to his feet. He's not wearing a full tuxedo but one of those novelty tuxedo shirts and some daisy dukes. He has on no shoes but he's trying super hard to find a way to stand up but whatever he's stepping on is very mushy and spongy. It could be cake or something from another planet. Who actually knows.

Peter's got a hand over his eyes as he stumble steps his way towards the nearest wall. The wall that has about fifteen knives stabbed into a hastily drawn 'dart board'. "It can't be my fault. I don't even know /it/ is."

More blinking. "Rocket! What did you do?!" There we go. Classic Quill blame shifting is in full effect.

"And why do I smell fudge?!"

Rocket has posed:
Rocket doesn't get out of the jacuzzi so much as he falls out of it. Splash. Right into the ankle deep water with what he genuinely hopes is a snickers bar floating past his snout. "..." Splash splash splash, he swats it away with both hands. Aint taking no chances... Bill Murrey isn't here to take a bite and tell them whether it's a candy bar.

    That's a Caddyshack reference btw.

"Hey.." A clawed hand smacks the lady leaning over the toilet on the back of the shoulders, "Who are you? Where are we?" His nose curls several times, smelling at the air, "Why does it smell like fudge?"

With only a groan in response to his series of questions, Rocket makes his way towards the door. Into which he bangs his head and immediately regrets that little interaction... When he finally spills out into the hallway, he's on his hands and knees. "Quill, there's dookie..." He points back into the bathroom. "There's dookie in there, who does that? What kinna animal..."

A llama walks by... Rocket follows it with a slow turn of his head.

It has a pacifier in it's mouth.

    Up nods at him.

        "Sup thug." Real recognizes real.

Carol Danvers has posed:
As reality continues to reassert itself, Carol rises up from her boneless sprawl in the corner of the suite... not standing. Floating. Floating up, because little known fact: You don't need to balance to fly. Oh, you need to for... complicated flights. But not for slow floating. She can handle this.

Her hands begin a not-quite-fast-enough to be frantic patdown of herself. Because the idea of moving quickly hurts her very soul.

"...Where's my phone. Where's my VERY IMPORTANT AVENGERS PHONE?!" She furrows her brow slowly, fuzzy memories trying to surface, "...Did... did we try to order pizza from Thanagar? I think I tried to order pizza... and... threw my phone... at the sun?" Her brows furrow more, "Wait... it was.. night time and... maybe the moon?"

She groans again, that slow, hesitant floating having not paused, which means she's perilously close to bumping into the ceiling.

"This is... god, I used to /live like this?/"

Mary Bromfield has posed:
Mary drops back down into the fort after hearing the moan, and also realizing what she's wearing. Which is to say... a rather haphazard Chun-Li cosplay. Or at least the top half of it. Complete with the hair buns and ribbons as she suddenly vaguely remembers Mantis or Drax maybe asking what exactly cosplay was and then demonstrating...

At least, that's what she hopes it was, as she glanced down at Amy, who was currently dressed up at Cammy from Street Fighter. Complete with her hair being done in an elaborate braid. Or at least, it /was/...

"Oh, um, Carol, I think I was charging it. Here." She reaches down and tosses Carol the Avengers phone, before reaching down and lightly nudging Amy. Either this was a really good first date, or a total disaster.

Maybe both?

Amy Winston has posed:
A struggling noise and a moan, Amy's hair is a total mess. Clearly, what happened in the pillow fort might have been heard outside of the pillow fort but there will be no talk on that. After all, this is Vegas! She glances up at Mary, blinking at the cosplayed girl in the Chinese hair bun and down at her own haphazard unitard, and her cheeks are red for a few moments, before she reaches to grab Mary's hand.

"Next time, don't get something that crawls so far up my butt." comes her muttered response, her braid a partially unraveled mess before she kisses Chun lightly on the cheek. "That was only the first round." she points out cheekily, before seeing the others.

"Oh... uhm. Hi. I'm Amy."

Peter Quill has posed:
"..."

Peter's either completely shocked by everything he's seeing or not shocked at all. It's hard to tell considering the fact that he's still trying to get his bearings. "When did we even--" Peter turns to look out of the broken window. "... are we in Vegas?" Confusion is setting in.

The other llama walks by wearing a ton of gold chains. One of them being a giant gold T. In fact, all of those chains look -really- familiar to anyone that is an expert on 80s pop culture and pitying fools.

"Hey." Peter offers to Amy while looking around at the others. "This is not what our lives are actually like." He motions towards Rocket. "His room maybe but not the rest of us." Shots fired and Peter's back to trying to figure out things.

"So uh... if we're in a hotel room, then--" His eyes go wide for a moment. Worry sets in as he sticks his head out of the window, trying not to knock the piano down. He looks around as much as he can and sees not what he looked back out there to see. Which he should be able to see since it's pretty big and see-able! He brings his head back in and with a sigh that brings the camera zoom right on up to his face, there's only one question left to ask.

"... Where's The Milano?"

Rocket has posed:
"Oh, hey Carol."

So casual. Rocket waves, from his hands and knees, in a puddle of Mountain Dew Pitch Black. (R.I.P. Bray Wyatt) After the wave, his hand slaps down into the puddle of Mountain Dew Pitch Black. (R.I.P. LA Knight's career now that Cody Rhodes is in WWE)

"What?! My room don't look like this..." It might. Well it might 'right now', they just finished rebuilding it, so there's a strong chance every room looks a lot like a construction site for space ships without all the fine details that make a space ship a home.

He smells like wet dog because his fur is soaked. Even if he is in a torn up tuxedo. Because he's a raccoon. Who waves at Amy, "Hey." Also very casual despite the fact she just said something went all the way up her butt. Disney's gonna be pissssssssed.

"The Milano's fine. Remember? Carol said she 'had' to have Carl's Junior while we was out west, so we flew it through the drive throu." Which is maybe thirty or forty seconds worth of last night. "An' I'm gonna be honest, I don't get the hype. How come all them Californeans-" Said as if that is an alien species because to him they are, "- are so-" pointing at Amy, "-up their own ass... see cus she said it now I can... how comes they up their own ass about Carl's Junior."

    Which is absolutely besides the point.

"Then we toilet papered Vanilla Ice's house."

Carol Danvers has posed:
Carol reaches out to catch her phone, succeeding, even if it does mean she lazily spins through the air like an out of control satellite for a few moments... because she's got bigger things to do than focus on not kicking the ceiling or floating out any open windows or balcony doors.

Pictures. She has to make sure there are no pictures. Or that there are. Or both. No pictures of incriminating evidence, but also maybe some pictures to jog her memory?

And as she's tapping and swiping and desperately navigating her phone...

"Wait, we got Carl's Jr.?! I GOT TO GET CARL'S JR. AND I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER IT! OH MY GOD!"

She blinks and frowns slowly, "Hey I didn't move the Milano. I don't move spaceships I, admittedly, more than most people, do sometimes /punch/ them but... I'm pretty sure I didn't punch any spaceships last night..."

She sounds very very sure about this. So sure.

And then she's peering upside down at Mary and Amy's fort. "Oh. That's neat! ...Also, yeah, like, we don't normally do this. I mean, I don't normally do it. Anymore." She chews her lower lip slowly, "...I think I'm going to call my lawyer after this. Just in case."

Also also just in case she drunk dialed Jen last night. Although given the lack of a flood of texts from her Gamma Charged best bud, she's pretty sure she didn't.

Or she did and Jen is also having a weird night. It'll all work out, she's sure.

She looks back to Rocket, "Wait... did you give the Milano to a valet? Is that why it's not parked outside?"

Mary Bromfield has posed:
Mary blinked at Amy, then says, "Hey, I offered you Juri, I... I think." She then blinks again at the kiss, "Round two?" She sounds a little bit surprised that there's going to be, then she smiles a little, because... well, if Amy isn't going to run away screaming from /this/?

Definitely a keeper.

So with that, Amy gets a kiss back on the cheek, "Alright, um... first off. Pants. We need pants. And then yeah. Milano. Need to figure out where that went. I just remember making fun of what Carls Jr thought a 'cheesesteak' was..."

Amy Winston has posed:
Oh, there's a lot to unpack here. That's for sure. So Amy starts at the top. "Pants." With a wave of her hand, and some words of anctient Yiddish dialect, gone are the girls costumes, replaced with pants and shirts that are totally touristy kitsch. With that out of the way, she's working her way down the list. "In and Out is far superior to Carl's Jr. and I will fight anyone that disagrees with me on that." she points out.

Her arm slides around Mary's waist to hold onto her. "And I though you asked what a Cheesecake was and I had to show you." A small smirk of amusement, and her purple eyes flicker warmly.

"Anywho, more proper greeting later. What's a Milano?" she asks curiously. "If you have some part of it... I might be able to track it."

And softly offered words for Mary.

Peter Quill has posed:
There's a good chance that Peter's paying attention but there's a bigger chance that he's just nervous about his ship. They JUST got her back together and now there's a chance that she's not in a safe place and that's weighing on his soul a bit.

"Who the hell is Carl?!"

Peter stumbles again because the floor's a mess and he can't fly right now. He's hoping his normal gear and clothes are on the ship but they don't have the ship so that's why he's just going to have to stumble around this damn hotel suite until he can figure out where she is!

"I swear to god if something happened to her. I just got her back." Peter looks like he's starting to freak out. But thankfully, the question from Amy pulls his focus in her direction. "The Milano is my ship. She got blew up. Rocket and I put her back together with my own very capable and very loving two hands." Even though the earlier montage proves Rocket did the bulk of the work. "And now she's lost. And if we don't find her, we're going to be stuck here."

Peter's reaches out to grab the nearest llama by the -- does it even have shoulders? "I can't be stuck here!"

Rocket has posed:
It only showed Rocket doing the bulk of the work because Rocket did the montage and everyone is the star of their own show. There exists other versions where Carol did all the work... there may even be one where Groot is the responsible party who nailed the ol bird back together with love and a little tree sap.

"I am Groot." Speaking of which.

The lumbering Groot comes lumbering out of the bedroom.

    He has on a bow tie and is grinning.

"That's right!" Rocket snaps and points up at his ol' pal!

"Y'all really don't remember none of this? After we had the Carl's Jr an' tossed some rolls of toilet paper at Vanilla Ice's Malibu home, we came to Vegas." He pushes up to his full two and a half feet to pad over in tuxedo to throw open the curtains. "Where we did a whole other montage of us winnin' at roulette cus I used a magnetized palm pad to completely rig the game. Then we got throw out... then we came here to the Belagardia.. Bulagio? Bulb-... Bulb somethin', I'm sure it had a B in't.. Anyways we came here to the Bologne." It is entirely too bright.

"/I/ am Groot."

    "Yeah I'm gettin' to that part, hold your acorns."

"I AM GrOOt..."

    "Don't you get sassy wit' me, I told you not to drink the fountain water!"

Groot grunts, then returns to the bedroom. Right past Drax.

Who was standing here the whole time.

Drax turns and follows Groot into the bedroom.

    Door closes.

"Anyways, we let C-Money fly the Milano cus he said he aint never flown in a real space ship before... It's fine tho, his real name's Clarence."

Carol Danvers has posed:
Carol eyes Pete balefully. Or, you know, maybe she's eying him impassively, and the hangover just makes her look baleful.

"Carls Jr., not Carl. I don't think there's a real Carl. It's a burger place. It's fine. It's like... Hardee's out east or something. But they have GIANT SODAS and that's important."

And then she's back to barely being able to remember her name, let alone having any way to sort out her fragmented memory, "Wait, ...Is that the Llama? Can you talk to Llamas? Why would a Llama choose the naem C-Money?"

she looks back to Amy and Mary and sighs, "I swear, I swear I was a role model for like... FOUR YEARS without stuff like this happening. It's definitely Quill's fault. You just heard him say he can't even keep track of his ship! He is a walking bundle of misbehaviour."

Yes. This is definitely all Quill's fault and not hers. Or Rocket's. They're innocent.

Mary Bromfield has posed:
Mary blinks as she now has on not only pants, but pure tourist kitsch to blend in. Complete with oversized plastic sunglasses with little yellow lightning bolts on the frames. A bit of sympathetic magic at work, perhaps, as she grins at Amy, returning the embrace as she says, "Well... yeah, later. Actually, wait, the Rock!"

She grins at Amy, "When we were tracking down the Heralds of Galactus and stuff, I put a sliver of the Rock of Eternity on the old Milano, so I could ride the lightning and get there no matter where it was. Seemed like such a good idea that I made sure to put another one on the new Milano too." She gives Amy a wry look, "Think you could track it down, Amy?" Her grin goes a bit wider, as she looks super excited, and not /just/ because of what Amy whispered to her just now...

Amy Winston has posed:
As Amy turns over the idea in her head, she nods finally. "I'll need to use you as a conduit, since you are thick with the magic of the Rock." There's a giggle from the Magical Princess at an inside joke, but she reaches out, settling her hands into Mary's. "I need you to focus on your connection. I'm going to sync our magics and open a portal..."

As she twines her fingers with Mary's, she watches the other girl's eyes as she lights up with magic, and Amy works on feeling it out, her own eyes glowing brightly as the wind picks up in the room, tossing lighter items around, toppling the pillow fort as Amy chants in that magical language of hers. And then... she realizes she's glancing over Mary's shoulder and... "Say... the Milano. It's a big blue and orange spaceship right?" she asks.

And then after a moment, she adds. "Like that one over on top of the parking garage out this window?"

Rocket has posed:
Rocket is motioning out the window, "That's what I been tryin' to tell you!" He has done no such damn thing. "It's right there... Jeez." He jerks the curtains closed and pats off his palms. "Now if you'll 'excuse me', I needa go save a lady from a turd." He points both clawed index fingers towards the bathroom, where the... god is this his wife..? Is starting to stir. "Carol, call ya lawyer friend ya mentioned last night, I'm thinkin' Imma need one. Then again, maybe this makes me a legal Terran?"

"Nah, fuck that, call the lawyer."

He heads into the ankle deep water, slogging through, kicking a beach ball out of his way, muttering about how much he hates Terra.